me by my merit, not my face on some magazine.” He paused and turned toward her. “Know what I mean?”
AJ met his gaze without blinking. You have no idea, cowboy. The words nearly escaped before she bit them back. “I think I might,” she said instead.
Travis stared for a moment before his eyes widened. Then he lowered his head and focused on putting the key in the ignition. “Yeah. I guess you do,” he murmured.
Silence filled the cab as he backed up and headed back to the ranch.
“Did I mention that you did a nice job with Rusty?” Travis said minutes later.
“Pardon me?” She turned to look at him.
“Rusty. Nice job. Did I say that?”
“Yes, you did. Thank you.”
They drove in awkward silence until Travis glanced over at her, a question on his face.
“What is it?” she finally asked.
“You’re an only child and Lemuel McAlester is your stepfather?”
“Yes. When I was in college, my mother married Lem and they renamed my father’s ranch. Lem is a good man, but he never really knew what to do with a grown stepdaughter. He takes care of Gus for me and I try to stop by or call when I can. Not as often once Jace left the rodeo circuit and moved to the ranch.”
“Lem turned the spread over to Jace?”
She nodded. “Jace is his only child. Our parents married after we both had left home. Me for college and Jace for the rodeo circuit.”
Travis shook his head. “Bet that was a surprise. Finding out Jace was your family.”
“It wasn’t so bad when my mother was alive. She provided a buffer. Once I lost her, my entire world was turned upside down. Jace made it clear everything would be his when Lem retired, so I never looked back.”
“I’m sorry, AJ.” His dark eyes were warm with concern.
“Thank you,” she murmured.
“I don’t understand why Lem didn’t step in. After all, that ranch was yours, as well.”
“My stepfather is no different than most of the old-timers in Oklahoma. He believes a woman’s place is in the kitchen.” She shook her head. “He forgets that, besides cooking, I can also mend fences, rope and brand cattle.”
Travis offered a solemn nod. “How long ago since you left?”
“Nearly ten years, though it turned out the joke was on Jace. His father didn’t trust him enough to retire until this year.”
Travis rolled down the window. “You mind?”
“Not at all.”
His fingers tapped out a beat on the steering wheel in time to the country-western song on the radio.
“Funny our paths haven’t crossed before now,” he finally said.
“How long have you been in Timber?”
“A little over five years.”
“How did you end up here with the ranch?” AJ asked.
“After we were fished out of foster care, by a cousin of our mother’s, we lived in Pawhuska. My sisters and I didn’t even know about the land in Timber until she passed on and left it to us.”
AJ nodded and watched the tall prairie grass out the truck window.
“So what’s your plan?” Travis asked.
“My plan?” She looked at him.
“Yeah. I’m guessing you aren’t here for the long haul.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Big Heart Ranch obviously is not the last stop on your trail.”
AJ stared at him, suddenly bone-weary. If only he knew how much she longed to be in it for the long haul, as he put it. She took a deep breath, shoving back the emotion burning behind her eyes. The emotion she could never reveal because every time she did, she was disappointed. Again.
“I’ll stop when I know that I’m where God wants me to be. Then it will be time to put down roots.”
“What’s if that’s Big Heart Ranch?”
“I’m not ruling it out.”
Silence hung in the air as AJ considered his words. Her plan? God’s plan? She’d take either at the moment, praying one of those plans included an end to her drifting, and finding a place where she was actually wanted. Needed.
“Mind if I ask a personal question?” he finally said.
“I won’t know if I mind until you ask.”
“Fair enough.” A small smile lifted his lips. “Who’s Gus?”
“My horse. A gift from my mother.”
“Why don’t you move him over to Big Heart?”
“It’s complicated.”
“I understand complicated. Why don’t you try me?”
“Look, I’d rather not move Gus and have to move him back if this job doesn’t work out. Besides, Gus had a pretty big vet bill a while back and I’m still paying Lem for that.”
“This is your call, but I’m happy to help.”
“I’d rather do things my way.”
“Understood.” Travis cleared his throat. “Any idea how Jace knows that we’re applying for the grant?”
“What?” Her head jerked up at the quietly spoken question and she met Travis’s gaze.
“How does—”
“I have no idea.” She paused, struggling to read between the lines of his question. “You don’t think I told him, do you?”
“Just asking.” Travis took a deep breath.
“‘Just asking’ sounds an awful lot like an accusation to me.”
“Whoa.” He raised a hand. “I’m just doing the math.”
“You can subtract me from your equation.”
“I apologize,” Travis said.
AJ was silent, uncertain if he was sincere.
“Look,” Travis said. “You don’t know me and I really don’t know you. All I’m doing is trying to figure things out.”
Trying
