cut myself off from friends and family. When the Russell clan started pressuring me too much to jump back into life and just ‘get past it,’ I turned off my phone and stopped answering when the doorbell rang.”
“Did you get those who’d also lost loved ones that felt the need to load you down with their stories?”
“That, too.”
“What did you do?” They’d never talked about this before. Until now, Lynley had kept the subject of Sandra’s death off-limits, just as she’d kept the subject of her father’s behavior off-limits.
“I asked for an interdepartmental transfer at work and changed churches. Even though I loved my church, they couldn’t understand that I’d become a different person. I stopped teaching Sunday school, quit choir, stopped committee work, and they decided I’d lost my faith.”
“And yet you didn’t shut God out of your life.”
“How could I shut out the One who is my reason for living? I feel as if I failed Sandra because I haven’t followed up on her final request.”
“Did she give you a time limit?”
He shook his head.
“Then don’t worry so much,” she said quietly. “I understand, John. Something in you died with Sandra, just as something in me died with the death of my marriage. Sometimes I feel there’s too much pain from the past to risk the same in the future.”
He shot her a glance. “Wow, we’re perfect for each other, aren’t we?”
She gave him a sad smile. “We both want solitude. I feel as if my comfort zone has been depleted. Even when I feel a strong desire to be a part of someone’s life again—”
“You also feel a need to withdraw?” he said.
“Sometimes.”
He flipped the turn signal. “Your friendship has been a happy constant in my life since I first arrived in Jolly Mill. I could be mistaken, but it doesn’t seem as if either of us has had a lot of that solitude lately.”
She leaned back in her seat, surprised that she hadn’t acknowledged that herself.
Was it time to put some distance between them, despite her growing attraction? She couldn’t bear to be the cause of another devastation in his life. What if someone managed to get to her, even after all John’s efforts?
“I didn’t mention it in front of Mom yesterday,” she said, searching for a change of subject, “but when Dodge and I moved here from Kansas City, it was so I could help take care of her. He once casually remarked that if Mom died we’d never have to work again.”
John sucked in his breath.
“That broke the emotional ties I had with him. It was when I discovered he wasn’t the person I believed him to be. I just didn’t do anything about it until I had legal reason.”
“Anything else he said that would lead you to believe he’d threaten your life for money?”
“Nothing he ever did or said implied he would threaten my life, John. Sure, he likes money. He doesn’t like work. During the divorce proceedings he did ask for a piece of the inheritance he knew Mom would receive, even though his own attorney rolled his eyes at that.”
“You didn’t mention that yesterday.”
“I’ve tried so hard for so long to forget about his involvement in my life, these things slipped my mind. My father was the one who told Dodge about the money. Neither Mom nor I ever mentioned the extent of Uncle Lawson’s personal finances because it was no one’s business.”
“Do you think Dodge remained in the area because he thought he might still get a grab at the money?”
“You mean by threatening my life? I might not be the best judge of human nature—obviously I’m not—but I can’t bring myself to believe Dodge would spend this much of his life in the ‘backwater’ town, as he calls Cassville, just on the off chance that he might be able to swindle or threaten Mom into giving him money. Why not start robbing banks?”
“I need to know everything you know about Dodge, or about who else might have a reason to hurt you. This isn’t gossip. It’s self-preservation.”
“All I can think of right now is that I walked in on him with another woman. I’d already heard from too many people about his affairs, and I was sick of it.”
“So that’s when you filed?”
“That’s right.”
“Will it disturb you to learn that I discovered this morning that he’s snagged himself another woman—a neurologist who works in Joplin?”
“Why should it? He always did want to trade up financially. That leaves him even less likely to be the culprit. But it also means we might not catch him alone this morning.”
“Not we. I. I might not catch him alone.” John wrapped his Bluetooth earpiece around his ear. “You’re not coming in with me.”
“I know. You might not even catch him awake. It’s early yet, and unless Dodge has changed, he sleeps late on his days off.”
“I’ve already checked his schedule with the hospital, and he’s off today.” John glanced over at her. “Someday you’ll have to tell me about your father.”
Lynley stared out the window at the winter scenery, the patches of snow that were quickly melting. “He, too, had women.” She paused. “He attempted to kill Mom with mercury in the air vent to make it look as if she developed premature Alzheimer’s. And, like Dodge, he always attempted to seduce upwardly mobile women. Some desperate women with money could be generous to younger, attractive men.”
“How did you know about all this?”
“Small town, lots of big mouths, though he tried hard to keep Mom from knowing. After all, he knew she would inherit, and he didn’t want a divorce before that happened.”
John slowed the SUV nearly to a stop in front of Lynley’s former home. An older blue Ford was parked in front of a two-car garage. They sat and stared at it for a long, tense moment.
“There are a lot of blue cars on the road,” she said.
“Did he have this when you divorced?”
“No. He had the pickup truck, silver. Maybe we should’ve brought Mrs. Drews so she could identify it.”
“Take a picture with your cell, then link us up.” He made a U-turn and parked beneath the bare overhanging branches of a maple tree. He situated them just right so Lynley couldn’t be seen from the house. “Just sit and listen.”
Lynley sighed. “Having one’s life threatened can be so confining.”
“You’ll adapt.” He paused, adjusting the sound on his earpiece. “You know, tastes can mature over time.”
She screwed up her face as she tried to follow
