Meditation: The only introduction you’ll ever need. Christina Feldman
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PATIENCE
When you practise meditation and discover a mind that seems to be bursting with thoughts, a body that is restless or uncomfortable and emotions that are unpredictable or overwhelming it is easy to conclude that your meditation is impossible and worthless. The moment you focus your attention it seems to be swept away by memories from the past, planning the future or lost in the apparently endless mind storms of the present. You may be tempted to think that your meditation can only truly begin once you have succeeded in getting rid of or overcoming all of the distractions that plague you. This is a conclusion and an attitude that can only lead to tension, struggle and further confusion as you struggle with the apparently bottomless well of distractions. Consenting to this attitude breeds forcing, willpower and striving but does not lead to peace, calmness or understanding.
Patience is one of the primary enabling principles of meditation practice. It is the quality that allows us to find calmness and harmony in every moment rather than the struggle and tension born of impatience. The preoccupations, thoughts and distractions that appear to plague us and prevent us from meditating are not obstacles to be overcome or enemies to struggle with. It is in the midst of all of these that we learn some of the deepest lessons of our lives and our meditation. It is easy to hold love, compassion, acceptance and simplicity as ideals to be achieved in the future. It is also true that anyone can be compassionate when they remain unchallenged, we can love easily when surrounded by flattery, we can easily be calm when we are undisturbed – but this is not the truth of our lives. It is in the midst of disturbance, challenge and the difficult that we learn most deeply about acceptance, balance and compassion. The willingness to let go of our comparisons, evaluations and preoccupations with goals is a major factor in cultivating patience, to stay steady and balanced in the midst of busyness and confusion.
As we are faced with the variety of forces of our minds, hearts and bodies that appear to pull us away from our meditation it is patience that enables us to return over and over to the moment we are in with calmness and ease. No matter how lost we become in our thoughts and preoccupations, we can begin again to cultivate awareness and connectedness in the very next moment. The willingness to begin anew in every moment, free from judgement or conclusion is always possible for us. It is the embodiment of patience.
ACCEPTANCE
The capacity for acceptance is another of the primary principles that allows meditation to deepen and that runs through the variety of approaches. True acceptance is neither blind nor passive, but the capacity to see things as they actually are, free from judgement or prejudice. Acceptance is the extension of generosity, tolerance and forgiveness.
The process of inner change includes the process of becoming increasingly aware and sensitive to our inner landscape. In cultivating the power of attention we are revealed to ourselves. The variety of inner processes and dynamics that shape the life of our hearts and minds becomes progressively more visible to us. No one has yet created a path of meditation in which we are able to bypass ourselves – our bodies, emotions, minds, or personalities on the way to enlightenment, peace and understanding. Instead through meditation we become increasingly intimate with all the variety of thoughts, feelings, impressions and aspirations that shape us as human beings. We do not always enjoy or appreciate facets of our being that are revealed through our meditation practice. Qualities such as greed, anger, jealousy or indifference are not easy to accept with kindness and tolerance. It is easy to become judgmental and rejecting of parts of ourselves that we dislike because they are not in accord with our image of who we think we should be. Our judgements and rejections serve only to harden the mind and create endless agitation as we endeavour to avoid what we condemn within ourselves.
In a very real way meditation begins with acceptance. It allows us to soften and open, to bring compassion and generosity of heart. We do not have to justify, excuse or villify the variety of thoughts and feelings that arise. As we become increasingly aware and sensitive to the movements of our minds and hearts we also more deeply understand that rarely do they come to us through personal choice or selection but are born of confusion and misunderstanding. We are not always in control of our minds and hearts – this is a significant understanding. Rarely do we wake in the morning and decide it is a good day to be depressed or angry. Equally it is not so simple for us to wake in the morning and decide it’s a timely day to be happy or compassionate. Understanding with sensitivity and balance the unpredictable nature of our thoughts and feelings enables us to step back just a little, to refrain from judgement, to see things as they actually are and to stay balanced. This is the embodiment of acceptance and compassion.
Acceptance is the withdrawal of judgement and prejudice; this is also the beginning of change and transformation. Instead of resigning ourselves to helplessness or despair in the face of our thoughts and feelings or resisting them with tension and struggle we can turn our attention to meet directly whatever thoughts or feelings are present without conditions. Surrounding those inner processes with a clear and balanced attentiveness creates a relationship of interest and exploration rather than rejection. We begin to sense the possibility of new pathways of understanding, letting go and depth.
SIMPLICITY
Simplicity is a fundamental principle of meditation found in all spiritual traditions. Cultivating simplicity is in the service of establishing an environment of calmness and wholeheartedness in our lives and within ourselves. There are many dimensions to simplicity. Simplicity does not imply abandoning our lives, work and relationships. Simplicity is concerned with our approach to all of these areas of our life. Conscious simplicity is a path of disentangling ourselves from complexity, excess and the confusion generated by a mind that is fragmented and scattered. Excess may be in terms of possessions, commitments or thought. The mind that is burdened by excess in any area, is a mind that is starved of calmness and balance. Alienated from inner calm we are prone to habitual reactions and feelings of being overwhelmed by the events of our inner and outer world. Cultivating a path of simplicity begins with the honest reflection upon our lives to see where there is excessive complexity and entanglement. Do we do too much? Are we over-committed? Do we want too much? These areas signal their presence through tension, obsessive or repetitive thinking, habitual reactions and stress. We can interpret these signals of complexity and excess as messengers that invite us to give clear and conscious attention to the ways we may be able to cultivate disentanglement, simplicity and calm.
Simplicity is a path that is consciously developed through calm attention and wholeheartedness. Learning to be simply present, attending wholeheartedly to the moment we are in, is the path of meditation that can be applied to the whole of our lives. The cultivation of simplicity invariably has with it the companion of renunciation – not in the pursuit of asceticism but in the service of calmness and balance. Layers of judgement, evaluation and comparison are unnecessary burdens that distort our capacity to see each moment and each person in our lives as it actually is. We can learn to let go, to bring a fullness of attention to one moment at a time. In any moment of our lives it is not possible to attend to or solve every detail of our past or future. It is only possible to fully attend to and care for the moment we are in. Thoughts of past and future will continue to arise in the present – held in the light of clear and simple attentiveness they are divested of their urgency and will also pass. Held in the light of clear attentiveness there is the possibility of a more intuitive response emerging.
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