her heart tore in her chest and leaked pain. She reached out, but didn’t quite touch him. “I’m sorry.”
The words seemed inadequate. She reached over and blanked the computer screen, as though erasing the headlines could erase the memories.
“If I’d been there to drive her home…” His expression was closed, as though he were talking to himself now, as though this were a conversation he’d been through a thousand times in his head. “If I’d been better about separating my life from my work…” He trailed off and refocused on her. He scowled, but the expression didn’t seem as fierce as it had before. “Sorry. Not your problem.”
But it was her problem, she realized. It explained what had happened back in the alley, and why he had moments of being as overprotective as one of her four older brothers. Why he kept trying to push her to the edges of her own investigations.
It was her problem, because it was affecting her ability to do her job and make her place in Bear Claw.
Knowing it, but also knowing that she’d never been good at touchy-feely emotional conversations, she jammed her hands into her pockets. “I’m sorry, Varitek. There’s nothing I can say to make it better. Nothing at all. But I won’t let you shut me out of this case like you did with the kidnappings, just because I’m a woman and you’re afraid I might get hurt.”
He scowled down at her. “I didn’t shut you out.”
He was closer than she’d realized, a mere half step away. She wanted to retreat from the warmth of him, the sheer size of him, but held firm. “Yes, you did. Maybe you didn’t mean to, and maybe the lab fire made it simpler to use FBI equipment and personnel. But in the end, it was your work, not mine, and everyone here knew it.”
“I didn’t—”
She held up a hand to stop him. “Don’t worry. We’re both at fault because I let you take over. But not this time. This time you’re on my turf and I’m not giving it up.” She took a breath. “Look, I’ll admit it. With Alissa and Maya away, I could use help. But this is going to have to be my investigation and my evidence collection. I’m in charge this time.”
She expected an explosion, but instead he closed the scant distance between them, until that damn warmth kindled in her midsection and she saw the heat reflected in his eyes. “What do I get if I agree?”
Her first thought was so thoroughly sexual that she stumbled back on a wash of heat and surprise before catching herself and standing fast. Since when did her mind dwell in the gutter?
Sure she’d been on a dating hiatus for the past few months while getting settled in Bear Claw, and before that she’d stuck to casual things that rarely developed past pleasant kisses. She liked sex well enough, but she’d been…busy. Why had her body picked now to wake up?
She gritted her teeth, forced the heat aside and said, “What do you want?”
He stared down at her for a moment, and she didn’t dare interpret his expression, which was part closed off, part something else. Then he said, “The guy in the alley said he’d see you again. If he wasn’t focused on you before, he is now.”
The chilly logic chased away some of the heat. Cassie crossed her arms and swallowed a bubble of worry. “That’s good. It’ll give us something to work with. Maybe he’ll be stupid and make a mistake.”
“And maybe he won’t,” Varitek countered, voice dead level. “Bradford Croft wasn’t as smart as his crimes. That, plus the murder scene today, tells me we’re dealing with the slicker of the partners. We can’t count on him making a mistake.”
Cassie forced herself to meet Varitek’s eyes. “Which means?”
“That you’re in danger,” he answered flatly. “So here’s the deal. I’ll let you run the case and make you look good in front of the locals, but I’m in charge of security. In the lab, in the field, wherever. No debates, no questions asked. What I say goes.”
She bristled. “You’re not letting me do anything, and I don’t need you to make me look good.”
“Take it or leave it.” He shrugged. “I’m not here for a turf war. I’m here to help you people find a murderer before he strikes again.” His eyes sharpened on hers. “And he will strike again. Soon.”
She couldn’t argue against that. The pose and the missing fingertip argued for ritual. The lack of good evidence argued for the perfection of long practice.
Yes, the killer’s appetite would be whetted now. It was only a matter of time.
But it galled her to give Varitek control. She didn’t need anyone to protect her. She could take care of herself. Hadn’t she proved that when she moved away from her father and her four too-protective older brothers?
That thought brought an insidiously undermining voice that said, Yes, and you hooked up with a man just like them, only much, much worse.
“Do we have a deal?” Varitek asked, snapping her away from the memory of being weak.
She stiffened her spine because she wasn’t weak anymore, damn it. But she also wasn’t stupid or suicidal. Varitek had a point, whether she liked it or not. The guy in the red hat had rigged her brakes, and he’d promised to see her again.
So finally, though she wished there was another option, she nodded. “Deal.”
They didn’t shake on the agreement. She told herself it was because they didn’t need to, that their words were good enough. But deep down inside, she knew why she didn’t offer to shake his hand.
She didn’t want to know what it would feel like to touch him. Rather, she wanted it too much, and physical attraction had been her downfall once before.
She wouldn’t let that happen again.
Chapter Three
The next morning dawned a balmy forty degrees, which was both good and bad news for Cassie and Seth, who had decided to reexcavate the canyon gravesite in search of additional clues. It was good news because the ground would soften up quickly. Bad news because it meant they would be working in mud.
Knowing it, Seth skipped his usual slacks and button-down shirt and went with jeans and a sweatshirt. He kept a packed overnight bag in his truck, which saved him from having to hit the local mall. He armed himself with the backup weapons he kept in the truck’s locked console, and pulled out of the hotel parking lot feeling more centered than he had the previous day.
He’d considered spending the night on Cassie’s couch, but she’d nixed the plan in no uncertain terms and he hadn’t pushed because he’d needed the time away from her, needed to decompress.
He’d worked hard to deal with the memories and the guilt, yet a few old headlines on a Web search engine had slammed him right back to that place, breaching his defenses and sweeping him into the memories before he’d been prepared.
Seth braked the truck beneath a red light, and scrubbed a hand across his face, though that did nothing to erase the image of a delicate, dark-skinned woman with a riot of curls and laughing brown eyes. Robyn. Sweet, big-hearted, impulsive Robyn. They had met in college and immediately embarked upon a tumultuous relationship. The sex had
