It’s a peaceful feeling you can learn to live with, not something you have to search for. You can never find happiness by searching because the moment you try, you imply that it is found outside yourself. It isn’t. Happiness is the feeling of your own healthy functioning. When you accept the idea that healthy functioning is a significant part of yourself, you can stop trying to be happy and simply learn to be happy.
If you don’t learn to trust in and access your healthy functioning, it’s impossible to learn to be happy, because rather than learning to look for a feeling within yourself, you will continue to pay attention to the negative thoughts that run through your mind.
Your healthy functioning is not concerned with what happens in your life. It has a more expansive vision. It is concerned with how you relate to what happens in your life. Obviously there is a tremendous difference between these two modes. Your thought system comes up with what ‘it thinks’ would make it happy. Your healthy functioning, on the other hand, is what makes happiness possible. If all you had was your thought system, you would never be happy. You would be able to think of plenty of things that might make you happy, but you could never actually feel happy. Your thinking mind would keep coming up with conditions that would supposedly make you happy, but when the conditions were met, your thought system would begin to process all over again – coming up with new conditions that must be met. Your thought system will come up with ideas like, ‘I’ll be happy when my financial circumstances get better.’ If you won the lottery, however, your thought system would start all over again: ‘I wish the jackpot had been bigger,’ or ‘Oh no, what if I lose the money?’ or ‘What if they run out of money and can’t pay me?’ Such thoughts would again start to fill your head.
Your healthy functioning is that part of you that allows you to feel happy whether or not your financial circumstances are what you would like them to be. It’s a place within you that always feels content. Your healthy functioning is not interested in what happens, it’s only interested in how you feel and how you relate to what happens. All events, the good and bad, come and go. It is only your memory, your thinking, that keeps any event alive and relevant. The key to unlocking your inner happiness is to realize that you are the creator of those thoughts. Your healthy functioning is the part of you that knows that the true power in life is in the thinker – you – and not in the thoughts themselves.
Your healthy functioning is not just a theory or a passive entity to be read about and then forgotten. It’s a very real, positive and living force within you that you can learn to access. And as I have stated, you have already accessed it many times in the past, at those moments when everything felt just right. The key to eliminating unhappiness and replacing it with joyfulness is to learn to recognize healthy functioning when it is present in your life, and to help it grow and develop.
Your mental health can never be completely lost, it can only be covered up by negative, habitual and insecure thoughts that you have learned to take too seriously. The more seriously you take your own thoughts, the more distant your healthy functioning seems to be. Becoming aware that you have not just a personality and thoughts about your life, but also this other part of yourself, this ‘healthy functioning’, is a major weapon against unhappiness. When you know deep in your heart (even in the midst of a depressed state) that beneath your negativity lies a peaceful and light-hearted feeling that is ever present, you will regain the hope and confidence that a nicer, non-depressed, feeling is just around the corner – which it is. The only factor holding your unhappiness in place is your own thinking. All you need to do is relax and open your mind to the possibility that there is more to life than what you think about, and a new richness and sense of peace will begin to unfold for you. Begin by appreciating the simple, powerful feeling of your own healthy functioning.
If you are a parent, try to think back to the moment your first child was born. Remember the bliss, the joy in the way you felt. If you aren’t a parent, remember an instance when you were completely ‘present’, a time when your mind was nowhere else but right where you were, a time when everything seemed ‘just right’. It may have been a time in the beauty of nature, in a forest or by the sea. Perhaps it was a time when you fell in love. Everyone, no matter who they are, or how depressed they have been, has had at least some moments of healthy functioning in their life. No one had to teach you how to feel your own mental health. It just happens, all by itself, when you slow down your thinking and turn off your thinking mind. Your healthy functioning exists in the now. It occurs when you take your focus of attention off your concerns and problems, and instead allow your mind to feel at rest.
As you begin to realize that your healthy functioning comes from you and not from external sources, no matter how beautiful they may be, you can begin tapping into this beautiful place whenever you wish. Becoming conscious of your healthy functioning can be learned. You can learn to tap into it as easily while you are with your children or at work as you can while you are sitting in front of a fire or walking in a forest. All it takes is understanding, intention, patience, and practice.
Your healthy functioning is not only a place you can tap into on rare occasions or when you are sitting quietly by yourself, it’s a place in which you can live. Ask yourself daily, even hourly, ‘Where is that place in me? I know it’s there because I’ve felt it before.’ Your search for, and recognition of, your healthy functioning must be a significant and integral part of your life.
Your worldly pursuits, your dreams, and your aspirations are not jeopardized when you learn to tap into your healthy functioning. On the contrary, you will begin to see the bigger picture, you’ll see what truly motivates you and what you really want in your life. You will also see what activities and pursuits would be better left alone. This ability to leave things alone will also be true with regard to your thinking. Once you see where a particular train of thought is leading you, and you don’t like where you’re headed, you’ll be able to change course. You’ll spend less time doing things mechanically, and more time doing things for the love of it. Instead of believing ‘Anything worth doing is worth doing well: you’ll start to see that ‘Anything worth doing is worth doing because you enjoy it.’ You’ll have authentic inner power, a greater ability to say ‘no’ when it’s appropriate, and the wisdom to know what you really want. Accessing your healthy functioning allows you to see information in new and creative ways, and allows you to make rational, productive decisions in a timely manner. It allows you to enjoy, rather than struggle with, the ebbs and flows of life. It encourages your wisdom and common sense to surface.
Your healthy functioning can be pointed to and it can be felt. You can see the effects of its energy. You can see acts of loving kindness, compassion, and caring. You can see people who used to be angry and depressed who are now peaceful, loving, and happy. You can see people who have so much love and self-respect in their hearts that they rarely get defensive, upset, or critical of others.
Looking for the Clues
You can begin to look for clues to point you in the direction of your healthy functioning. To begin, you must first acknowledge that you have it in you – and then appreciate it when it is present. Don’t just look for healthy functioning when you feel upset, but pay attention to it when you are feeling good. In this way, your healthy functioning can grow. As more and more of your energy and attention are directed towards this other part of yourself, you will find yourself experiencing it far more often. The better feeling you experience will feed on itself, giving you more confidence and more hope, setting forth a positive, life-enhancing cycle. Over time you will be able to see yourself moving in and out of your healthy functioning, and eventually you will be able to live in this state of mind most of the time. Even when you aren’t able to tap into this happier state, you will at least know that it exists. This knowledge will protect and shield you against the grips of unhappiness and depression.
Your healthy functioning must become more important and more real to you than your unhappiness has been in the past. If it does, you will see new light and new hope emerging in your life. The moments of mental health
