out!’
A woman crashes into me, giving me a furious look and weaving past, muttering loudly about bloody tourists.
I am not a tourist, I think. I am – or will be, in just a couple of hours – an official Londoner. I step out of the way of the thronging crowds, pasting myself against a carved wooden window frame, and watch as a sea of people scurry past.
I add ‘stop dead on the pavement’ to my mental list of Things London People Never Do. I know that already, really, but it’s easy to forget when everything is so sparkly and festive. I pause for a moment and take a photo to share on my Instagram stories, because it’s just so ridiculously perfect and my life has been so beige and boring for months – it’s lovely to have something interesting to put on there. And then I take another of the street scene, because it’s just so … London-y and Christmassy and perfect.
I look at the flowers in the doorway of Liberty, thinking that it would be a nice idea to take Becky some as a thank you (again) for offering me a room in a house that would otherwise be completely out of my reach. There doesn’t seem to be a price anywhere though, which I think is weird, then I hear my Nanna Beth’s voice saying, If you have to ask, you can’t afford it. But they’re only flowers, surely. How expensive can a bunch of flowers be?
‘Can I help you?’ The girl behind the faux-Victorian wooden flower stall looks at me. She’s tiny and has huge brown eyes that match the expensive-looking Liberty of London apron she’s wearing.
‘I was wondering how much these are?’ I lift up a ready-prepared bouquet – deep red roses mingled with silver-grey foliage and white lilies streaked with lime green, still not quite open. They’re wrapped in thick, luxurious waxed paper and sealed with a gold Liberty sticker. They’ll make the perfect thank you present for Becky.
The girl chews her gum for a moment and looks at me, taking in the fluffy pink coat I bought for my big move (if I’m going to be a London creative, I thought I should wear something that suits my new job), along with my denim pinafore, blue tights and my trusty silver Doc Marten boots. When I got off the train from Bournemouth earlier I felt quirky and artistic, but now under her supercilious stare I think perhaps I look like a kids’ TV presenter.
‘Forty-seven pounds,’ she says. ‘And five pounds extra if you want our gift-wrapping service.’
Ouch. That’s a week’s worth of my new food budget. I put the flowers back in the stylish metal bucket. I think Becky would understand.
‘I like your coat,’ she says, as I start to slink off. I turn, surprised, and smile a thank you.
‘It’s from eBay,’ I tell her, patting my fluffy arm.
‘Cool. It’s really nice.’ The girl lowers her voice, conspiratorially. ‘I couldn’t afford the flowers either, if it helps. There’s a stall a couple of minutes away on Noel Street – he always has decent flowers.’
She waves her hand briefly in the air, but then another customer appears and she turns to them, greeting them with a cheerful smile.
‘Thanks,’ I say, in her general direction, but she’s not listening.
So I take my phone out. My sense of direction is absolutely hopeless, and I still can’t work out how people find their way around London. I’ve worked out bits of it, but I can’t seem to join them up. It takes me three tries, but I make it to Noel Street in the end. There I find a round-faced man wearing a Santa hat, singing along to Christmas songs from a Bluetooth speaker. His stall is piled high with fruit and veg, and – phew – surrounding it is a rainbow array of flowers, which look to my uneducated eye just as nice as the ones from round the corner at Liberty. Well, almost as nice. A bit gaudy maybe, but I can’t afford to be fussy on my new London wages.
Five minutes later I’m back on Oxford Street looking at the Christmas lights with a bunch of (considerably cheaper) red roses, their cellophane wrapping crinkling in my arms. The lights – strung from one side of the street to the other – sparkle against the sky, which ten minutes ago had been the usual English winter grey, but now has shifted to an ominous bruised purple. I’m trying to figure out if it’s easier to jump on a bus or get the tube to Notting Hill to meet Becky and my new housemates. I’m standing on a street corner peering at Google Maps again when the first hailstones hit me on the head. And – ow – they really sting.
In seconds the packed streets empty, as everyone ducks into the nearest shop or doorway to shelter, clutching their shopping bags tightly. Only the smug umbrella holders and the hardy few carry on, marching down pavements now clear of tourists and Christmas shoppers. The tyres of the red buses and black taxis hiss on the tarmac and the hailstones hammer on the metal awning over our heads. I’m crammed with a handful of shoppers in the doorway of – I look up to see a shiny brass plaque on the wall – NMC Inc, and then I frown at the screen of my phone once again.
‘Are you lost?’ a man says. He has Scandinavian-looking blond hair and a dark blue scarf wrapped round his neck. He’s got a bit of an accent and now he’s indicating my phone with a finger. ‘Where are you trying to go?’
‘Notting Hill,’ I say, feeling like I’ve stepped into a film for a moment. Christmas is everywhere and there’s a tiny split second where the noticing-things part of my brain is looking at me from the outside. The thing about being addicted to a certain kind of romantic movie is that you’re always half-expecting that your life might just suddenly take a turn for the better. And handsome Scandinavian types who look a bit like Jaime Lannister are pretty much up there on my list of good things.
‘I’m not sure which bus to get,’ I say. ‘Because I usually get the tube, but my friend said it was easy from here. Easy if you’ve got a sense of direction, I think. Which I definitely have not.’
And then I find myself telling this complete stranger, who has opened the Citymapper app on his phone and is tapping rapidly: ‘I’m picking up the keys for my new house.’ I can hear the little note of pride in my voice.
‘Nice,’ he says, smiling. He points to the bus stop on the opposite side of the road. ‘If you get the 94, it’ll take you straight to Notting Hill Gate. It’ll take a bit longer than the tube, but on the other hand, it’s a lovely view if you’re new to the area.’
‘Thanks,’ I say. I’m not doing a great job at trying to look like a well-established local, then. A fresh torrent of hailstones batters the canopy above us. ‘Might just wait a moment.’
‘That’s very wise.’
Obviously if this was one of those movies with woolly hats and kissing in the snow and hard-bitten businesswomen remembering the true meaning of Christmas, at this point we’d start a conversation, and he’d follow me onto the bus, and – well, you know the score. But this is not a movie, I am one hundred per cent single, and despite being as much of a sucker for a Richard Curtis movie as the next hopeless romantic, I remind myself that I am one hundred per cent not looking for anyone else. Because this is my new start, and my new life, and I am doing it On My Own.
The hail stops, and I try my best to stride across the road in the manner of an independent London girl living her best life, aware that the handsome Scandinavian person is watching and (obviously) thinking that I am the one that got away and wondering if he’ll ever see me again. What actually happens is I almost get knocked flat by a bloke on a Deliveroo bike, fumble to find my card to swipe it when I get on the bus, and when I do climb the stairs and sit down on a seat, I look across the road to see the handsome Jaime Lannister lookalike beaming with delight
