feeling lower than pond scum.
Shannon cleared her throat. “We... I...realized the marriage was a mistake right after we went through with it. We’re getting a divorce, but we just haven’t gotten around to it.”
Evie straightened and stared at Shannon. “This is too much. Keeping this secret was hurtful enough, but now finding out you’ve been stringing him along for seven years?”
Shannon went hot all over.
“Mama,” Jack said. “This is as much my fault as hers. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier. I just...didn’t want to talk about it.”
“You don’t want to talk about anything,” Keegan said. “Except horses and saddles. Silent as a man being shaved, as Granddad used to say.” He was still enjoying the whole drama.
The baby’s fussing turned into an all-out holler.
“I’m going to find Annabell some baby things.” Evie walked by, and Tom caught her around the waist.
“I’ll help.” He looked at her and squeezed again. Their eyes met, and she sighed, some of the anger leaking out of her. She did not exactly smile at Shannon, but her tone was softer.
“We’ll do everything we can to help you both.”
“Thank you,” Shannon said.
The time was broken up by his mother’s forays into the attic to find clothes, mostly in blues and yellows, leftovers from their babyhoods.
“The Thorn boys were all big tykes,” she said, “so little Annabell will be swimming in them, but at least she’ll have clean clothes to wear. Look, though. I found some pink things. Must have been from when I was expecting Barrett. I thought for sure he was going to be a girl.”
Keegan laughed. “He would have been one unattractive girl. Big as an ox and just as graceful.”
Shannon mumbled a thank-you.
Jack marveled at the sheer joy on his mother’s face as she sorted the clothes to take them to the wash. Even though the baby was not her kin, and they’d just shocked her badly, she had instantly offered up whatever she had. He blinked back a strong surge of emotion. His mother had a true servant’s heart. She didn’t deserve the hurt he’d dished out, not one bit of it.
She even managed to locate a bassinet, which made her eyes swim. Barrett ambled into the room with his arm around his wife, Shelby. Jack knew Keegan had filled him in on the latest bombshell.
“Perfect timing,” his mother said. “Barrett, can you go pick up diapers? I’m thinking a newborn size? She’s four months old, but tiny.”
Jack’s oldest brother rubbed his beard and broke out in a look of sheer panic when his mother began to expound over the various diaper options.
“Uh... I thought they just came in a one-size-fits-all kinda deal.”
Shelby laughed. “I’ll go with him. We’ll get bottles and formula and all the trimmings. Good practice for the future,” she said, elbowing him.
The expression of half terror, half longing on Barrett’s face made them all laugh.
When they finally finished rich bowls of stew with crusty slabs of bread, Shannon and Keegan tackled the dishes, while Evie rocked the baby in the adjoining room. Jack sank into a chair next to her. “I’m sorry.”
“You should be,” she said with spirit. “I always told you keeping a secret is the same as lying, and here you were keeping quiet about a thing as important as marriage. Inexcusable.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
She skimmed the baby’s downy head with her cheek. “Is it what you wanted, Jackie? The separation and the divorce?”
Her hands were so strong, he thought, calloused and capable, but she held the baby so tenderly. “I wanted her, Mama. I wanted Shannon.”
“Still?”
He shook his head. “I only need to be kicked in the teeth once to learn my lesson.” Part of his heart would always want her, but wanting and trusting were two different breeds.
“So, it’s going to be a divorce, then? When the baby is safe?”
Divorce. Ugly word. He swallowed, throat dust-dry. “Yeah.”
She bit her lip. “But this is probably painful for you. I mean, pretending to live as Shannon’s husband...”
It had taken him seven years to excise her from his every thought, but he was stronger now, over it, over her. Their marriage was made of flimsy paper. They were joined by nothing more concrete than words on a certificate. “We have to continue on, just until Dina makes contact with her brother. Then, after that...” He shrugged. “Nothing has changed.”
“Nothing?” She looked deep into his eyes.
He nodded. Nothing.
“Are you sure it isn’t better to give Annabell to the police, in spite of what Larraby said?”
“No, not sure, but I saw the bruises on Dina’s arms, Mama, the burns.” His fingers gripped the chair arm, fighting down the anger he felt that a man would choose to dominate a woman, physically hurt the mother of his own child. “We have to give her a chance to get free of the Tide.”
“But, Jackie.” Her voice was a soft murmur. “Shannon?”
Shannon looked over her shoulder at that moment. He glanced back, telling her silently and reminding himself. There’s nothing between us, Shannon. Don’t worry. I know that.
She turned away, wave of dark hair falling across the curve of her cheek, hiding herself from him, like she did from the rest of the world. Hurt thrummed again through his chest.
They decided it would be best to dive into the next round of explanations with Shannon’s mother the following morning, since Shannon could hardly keep her eyes open. The baby’s bassinet was next to the guest-room bed, where Shannon would sleep.
Though his body was wrung out with fatigue, he found himself still dressed, pacing his tiny room, filled with energy that no amount of reading or sit-ups could dissipate. He longed to play his guitar. Instead, he rummaged through his drawer until he found the small box that he had not been able to open since she’d returned it to him. The diamond set in the gold engagement band glimmered at him, taunting him for his stupidity. Six months of savings and weeks agonizing over the style, it had meant everything, and now it was only a dust catcher. Maybe that was what it had always been. He shoved it back in the drawer, pulled on his boots and let himself out.
The ranch at night always soothed him. There was music in the hush of the breeze stirring the grass and the springtime frog symphony echoing in the creek bed. Quiet places spoke to his soul—always had. Sunset brought the end to the clamor of horse trailers coming and going on their thousand-acre property, where they boarded and trained some sixty horses at a time. Nighttime held no clang of Ella’s hammer on the anvil as she crafted new horseshoes, no buzz of Keegan’s motorcycle along Oscar’s unused airstrip that Jack was saving every penny
