in life. Kate met Conner’s gaze, saw her concern echoed. Something shifted inside her, knowing they were united in caring for this baby.
She jerked her gaze away. She must not cross the line between a patient and a doctor’s assistant. And that included the patient’s family. Don’t let your emotions get involved. You do what you can and leave the family to pull together.
She hurried to the kitchen to prepare the water mixture for the baby. A few minutes later, she had everything ready and returned to the sitting room.
Conner shifted to make room for her at his side on the couch.
She eased the tip of the syringe into the little mouth and squeezed out a drop, then massaged the thin neck. “Come on, Ellie, swallow.” A sigh escaped her when the baby did so. “Thank you,” she whispered.
She met Conner’s look, found there a sense of accord in shared concern for this wee bit of struggling humanity. It warmed her cheeks and heart to feel united with him in this.
Turning her attention back to the baby, she squeezed out another drop and then another. After a few swallows, little Ellie refused any more no matter how much Kate rubbed her face and neck and begged her to take more.
With no desire to drown the wee thing, Kate withdrew the syringe. “I’ll feed her every few minutes.”
Conner’s blue eyes filled with worry.
She patted his arm. “We aren’t solely responsible for the outcome here. God has a bigger part in healing than any mere man can play.” She needed the reminder for herself as much as for Conner. She was often frustrated by the limitations of medical science.
He nodded and she again felt as if they shared equal concern and responsibility for providing what this baby needed. He bent his head over his daughter and whispered her name.
She wondered if Conner watched the rise and fall of the tiny chest as desperately as she did.
In a bit, Ellie made a mewling sound.
“Hand me that whatever it’s called and I’ll see if Ellie will drink some more. I’m no doctor, but I know she needs something in her stomach if she’s to survive.”
Kate gave him the syringe of sugar water. He eased the tip between Ellie’s lips and squeezed out a shot.
Ellie choked. Her face grew red.
Conner’s face blanched. “What do I do?”
Rather than explain it to the distraught man, Kate took Ellie, turned her over and patted her back. She bent over the baby, watching her face. “Come on, little one, take a breath.”
The baby calmed.
Kate’s heart took slightly longer to return to a normal pace.
She turned Ellie about to look in her face. “You gave us quite a scare.” Solemn eyes focused on her for a brief moment before losing interest.
Conner let out a long sigh. “I almost killed her.” His voice shook. His gaze met hers. She couldn’t say if it was gratitude or caution she saw in his eyes or something else entirely. Nor could she explain why the look made her ache inside.
She struggled to adjust her thinking about this man. She’d always thought him noble and honorable. To learn he had fathered a child left her wondering what sort of man he really was.
She placed the baby back in his arms and looked at the syringe. “Just a little at a time.”
Conner studied her for a moment, then turned to the baby. “Swallow for me, little Ellie. Please don’t choke.”
Water dribbled from the baby’s mouth.
Conner watched the baby for a moment, then lifted his gaze to Kate’s. “I can’t do this by myself. Will you stay and help?”
How could she stay? Father needed her.
“Please?” Conner’s eyes filled with kindness and something she wasn’t able to identify. Was it determination or regret? Fear or warning?
She brought her attention back to the baby. She had to do what she could to ensure little Ellie lived. A baby’s life hung in the balance.
“I’ll stay until she’s doing better.” Father would have to get along without her for a few hours. After that? Conner would need to find someone to tend his baby, but he had lots of people to choose from—his sister and his sisters-in-law.
Conner smiled. “Thank you. This baby needs a family, but right now she needs more. She needs what you can give her.”
Family. The word caught at her heart. Why did it trouble her? She could think of no reason and dismissed the thought. It wasn’t like she longed for something more. Medical care was what she offered. It was the focus of her life.
She’d once thought things might be different. As an eager seventeen-year-old, she’d loved the attention given to her by Edward Sabin over a six-month period. Her eyes full of starry dreams, she’d told him of her plan to become a doctor. He’d said she would have to choose between him and her dreams because he didn’t intend to share her with every Tom, Dick and Harry, or even every Mary, Alice and Harriet.
She’d said it wasn’t that easy and told him of her promise to Grammie. Grammie, who had raised her since her birth parents died when Kate was four until her own death six years later, said she had the gift of healing and made her promise not to waste the gift. Besides, she liked taking care of people.
Edward had stopped calling, but he’d made her acknowledge the impossibility of trying to be both a doctor and a wife and mother. Her own childhood after the Bakers had adopted her provided further proof. How many times had her sleep been interrupted as she was taken next door so her parents could attend some medical need? How often had she missed a social event for the same reason? But in exchange, she’d learned much about caring for others.
Kate went to the kitchen. Grandfather sat outside on the veranda, rocking in the sun and watching the activities in the yard. She glimpsed one of the cowhands riding by the garden.
It was all so ordinary and peaceful. Unlike her own home, where every ordinary moment ended with a call for the doctor’s services, where there was often a flurry of activity as they faced a medical crisis. It was just her father and her now. Mother had died eight years ago when Kate was fourteen.
Kate was a willing, eager participant in dealing with the frequent illnesses, accidents and childbirths, but as she waited for the water to boil, she leaned on the windowsill, taking in the calm scene.
The kettle steamed and the moment passed. She prepared Ellie’s feeding and returned to the sitting room and drew to a halt at the sight before her. Conner leaned back on the couch, his mouth open as he snored softly. The poor man must have been up most of the night. Ellie slept peacefully on his chest. A beautiful picture of fatherly love and care.
It triggered an ache hidden deep within her heart. One she must deny.
This man had a daughter and thus belonged to another woman. Not that it mattered to her. She had plans that would take her away from here. But for today, she would enjoy the feeling of warmth that being with the Marshall family gave.
