no, no.” Kiki waved an impatient hand. “This just came up. I found a website for a real estate agency, and one of the agents is named Victoria O’Hare. That’s her maiden name, and it’s possible she stopped going by Vicky. And—I don’t know, but there’s a photo of her. The last picture I have of her is from twenty-four years ago, but...this woman has red hair.” Kiki shook her head and then dropped it into her hands. “I’m terrified, Nic,” she said through her fingers. “Freaking terrified. I wish I never looked. I didn’t—for two years I didn’t, and then I had to go and start again.”
“That’s because she’s half of you,” Nicola said gently, placing a hand on Kiki’s arm. “You moved here to heal, but this place also allowed you to bury the things in your life you didn’t want to look at. But they come back—they always come back. You need closure with her.”
“But what if she wants nothing to do with me? I’m too scared to email her. What if she doesn’t write back? Or what if I scare her off and she goes into hiding again? What—what if she just doesn’t want to hear from me? I mean, she knows my name—she named me! If she wanted anything to do with me, she could have reached out anytime. It’s been twenty-four years, and nothing.”
“Oh, honey...” Nicola reached for her hand. “You for a daughter? She doesn’t know what she’s missing.”
Tears flooded Kiki’s eyes. “But that’s the whole point—she does! She’s the one who left me, remember? I was six years old. She knew exactly what she was doing.”
“But she didn’t leave you alone,” Nicola reminded her. “She knew you had your father, and he’s an amazing dad. Listen...” She tightened her grip on Kiki’s hand. “You need to meet with her in person—just show up at her work and force her to see you. I’ll go with you, okay? Where is she? She’s not still in Atlanta, is she?”
“That’s the thing.” Kiki shook her head in disbelief. “This woman is in Sydney, of all places. As in Australia. Which makes me think it can’t be her—why would she travel so far, unless it was to get as far away from me as possible?”
Nicola looked thoughtful. “Well, that is strange,” she admitted. “But it could happen. People end up all over the world for all sorts of different reasons. Just look at us—a couple of girls from the States. Who would have thought we’d end up living in the middle of the Caribbean?”
“Yeah, I guess so...” When Kiki pulled her T-shirt up to dab at her eyes, Nicola went to the kitchen to grab her a paper towel. Then she sank down on the sofa beside her again. “What?” Kiki asked when she felt her friend’s eyes on the side of her face.
“Just waiting, that’s all. There’s something else you’re not telling me.”
“My God, you’re a pain in the ass.” Kiki sighed deeply. “Okay. This is kind of crazy, but Dev offered me a job today. His tour assistant just quit and he needs a new one. Would you please stop fucking smiling?” Kiki threw her hands up in annoyance. “I said no, of course. But here’s the crazy part. His tour will take him to Sydney. And I—I really can’t afford to go otherwise. I mean, to spend that kind of money to go and check out a remote possibility? It’s just not going to happen on my bartending tips.”
“So it’s a sign!” Nicola said, clapping her hands together. “Come on—you have to accept!”
“But I can’t! It’s—it’s Dev! We had a...a thing, and that messes everything up. I mean, watching him get swarmed by groupies for weeks on end? No thank you. And besides, I have a life here...” she ended weakly, thinking that did have a life here felt more accurate right now.
“Listen, sweetie. I know it might not be the perfect scenario, but this is a lifetime opportunity. Eventually you have to get back to the real world anyway, and this is your chance to start a new career. Remember—the Kiki I met in LA was a go-getter with big career goals! But more important, this is a chance to find your mother, and you can’t pass that up. No matter what may or may not happen between you and Dev,” she added when she saw the protest forming on Kiki’s face.
Oh, God. Nicola was right, Kiki knew, but just the thought of it—leaving the safety of her island world and her easygoing job, working side by side with Dev, confronting the woman who had abandoned her as a child—was enough to tie her stomach in knots.
“You are a survivor,” Nicola went on, her voice strong with emotion. “And you’ve never been one to take the safe route. Even if I don’t know the details of what happened between you and Jack, I know that by moving here and shaking your life up, you took a huge risk to find happiness. This might scare you more than anything you’ve ever done, but fear won’t stop you. It never has.”
“Thanks for the pep talk, Brené Brown.” Kiki smiled weakly as a knock sounded at the door. Knowing it was Alex back from the store, she quickly flicked her tears away and ran a hand over her hair. Nicola rose to greet him, but though the aqua eyes belonging to the man on the landing were identical to Alex’s, this man had a power over Kiki that his brother didn’t have.
Dev.
“Hi there,” he said, transferring the Beats he was wearing on his ears to around his neck. His gaze rested on Kiki, making her belly flop over. “I hope I’m not...?”
“No, it’s fine,” Kiki said. Nicola stepped aside, and Dev walked over the threshold. There was a rock star in her house. Kiki almost laughed aloud as she cast a glance around, comparing her tiny combined kitchen, living and dining area to his sprawling beachside home.
“Listen,” he said. “I just—there was something I didn’t say to you today, and I couldn’t leave without being honest.”
“I think you were pretty damned honest,” Kiki said as she stood. “If I recall.”
Nicola grabbed her handbag from the coffee table. “I’ll just—”
“No,” Dev said quickly. “You’re her best friend, and I’m fine for you to hear this. Just...” He took a breath. “A tour is a really intense experience, and I need the right people to get me through it. I know I’ve just sprung this on you out of nowhere, but I want you to know that the real reason I want you with me is because I trust you. And that’s hard for me to come by.”
Kiki absorbed his words. “But...you don’t know me well enough to trust me.”
“I know, and that’s the crazy thing. I can’t explain it, but I felt it the moment I met you.” He shook his head. “I’m making this weird for you. I don’t want you to accept because you feel obligated to. But if you do, it’s your terms, okay? Business only—if that’s what you want.”
Kiki swallowed hard. There were so many reasons to accept and only one reason not to. But that reason was huge, because it was Dev. It would take every bit of her strength to make it to the end of six weeks with her virtue intact, not to mention her heart. The only way this would work would be for her to develop a resolve of steel.
Dev was looking at her with something close to pleading in his eyes. It’s still a no, she opened her mouth to say, but it didn’t come out. “I, uh...”
“—accept your offer, for double my regular salary,” Nicola coached her with a mischievous grin. “Right, Kiki?”
Kiki nodded slowly as Dev’s mouth turned upward
