at least, when he returned to himself he was with Zara.
“Oh,” she said, the word coming out on a long breath.
“Are you disappointed?”
“No. I just... I didn’t know. I didn’t know it could be quite like that.”
“Neither did I.” And that was true. He had used sex for a great many things in the past. And always, he was in control. If he was seeking numbness, temporary companionship, that was what he would find. A mere distraction, and then he would be diverted for just a while. But he hadn’t claimed the control here. This had been a fight to the finish. And right now he could not confidently say he had come out the conqueror.
At the moment, he felt conquered.
“I will have your things moved back into my room.” He didn’t think the words through before they came out of his mouth, but he meant them. He would reclaim control of the situation. He would have his way. There was no reason for her to sleep in her own bed, not when they had discovered this connection between them.
He hadn’t used a condom this time either.
Rather than cursing himself, he felt a kind of grim determination and satisfaction. If she was with child, she wouldn’t be able to push back against him about the engagement. About the marriage. And while he had a feeling he had managed to talk some sense into her, insurance didn’t hurt.
He ignored the biting guilt that came on the heels of that thought.
“Now you’re having me move back in?” she asked.
“That is what I said.”
“But you threw me out!”
“And now I am throwing you in. Things have changed.”
“The sex, you mean.”
“Between men and women there is very little else.”
She frowned. “Is that true?
“In my experience. Though what we have is very good sex. As I said, it is not always like that. It has never been like that for me.”
“Yes,” she said, climbing up the bed, pulling the covers back and burrowing beneath them. “Because you have vast experience.” Her voice was muffled by the blankets.
“What are you doing? Are you burrowing?”
“I am not.” She shifted beneath the covers. “I’m cold.”
“I think you’re hiding from me.” He pulled the covers back and she made a sharp, short sound of protest. He slipped beneath them, alongside her, and covered them both back up. “Do not hide from me.”
He didn’t know why he cared. Didn’t know why it mattered. Only that he had felt connected to another person for the first time in longer than he could remember, and he didn’t want anything to disturb that. He didn’t want her hiding from him.
“This is very new.”
“I know. You wanted to experience things.”
“Well.” She shifted, moving away from him slightly. “Now this, and you, are things that I have experienced.”
He wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her up against his body. “This was not a onetime thing. You are going to be my wife. That means you will share my bed.”
“If...if I am your wife, and I share your bed, that means you will not share it with other women.” It was not a question; her tone was fierce.
He had not intended that. Not at all. But this was a test of his control. He clenched his teeth. “Yes. I swear it.”
She looked straight ahead, her dark eyes unreadable. “Then...yes. Yes, we will go forward with the wedding.”
ZARA WOKE UP feeling different. It took her a moment to figure out exactly why. Mostly because though she woke up in Andres’s room, she woke up in an empty bed. The sheets were cold, and it was clear that Andres hadn’t been between them for hours.
She sat up, holding the blankets to her chest. She looked out the small window that was behind the bed, and saw that the sun was high in the clear December sky. She got up, leaving the blankets behind, gazing outside at the landscape. It was covered in snow, the light glittering over the pristine blanket. It was late. She had no idea how late.
They had left the lunch yesterday, and then...all of that had happened. They had come back to the room. There had been the bath. Then the rest. Then more. And eventually, she had fallen asleep. Somewhere in there, she was pretty certain she had agreed to marry him. She looked down at her left hand and saw that she was still wearing his ring. Yes, she had definitely agreed.
And apparently she had also been in bed for nearly twelve hours.
She groaned and turned back to the bed, flopping down over the top of it. Right then the doors to the room burst open. She scrambled for the blankets, pulling them over her naked body.
“Oh, good,” Andres said, closing the doors behind him. “You’re awake.”
“Barely,” she said.
“We have somewhere to be.”
“What?” She sat up. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because I didn’t know until recently. And because you have been asleep.”
“I would have thought your schedule would be more fixed.”
He shook his head. “Regrettably, no. I don’t normally live here at the palace.”
The statement took her by surprise. She had assumed that Andres lived here. Then she realized she had not been here very long, and they had never discussed it. “You don’t?”
“No. I have penthouses in a few of the major cities in the world. I try to avoid being under my brother’s roof when possible. Sadly, of late, it has not been possible.”
“So we... We won’t live here?”
“No. Unless it is very important to you.”
She shook her head. “No. I... Which cities?”
“Paris. New York. London.”
“I should like to live in those. All of them.”
“Sometimes we will.”
For the first time she felt wholly pleased with the idea of marrying him.
“I see that you like that.” A smile curved the corner of his lips. He seemed pleased that she was pleased. And that made her feel...pleased. She had the feeling that sex made people slightly crazy and she was suffering the aftereffects of that. She had spoken very boldly of all she
