should I say to any of them? Better to just make that call than to sit on the toilet staring at a mobile phone, surely that wasn’t overly hygienic.
‘I’ve been wondering when you’d call.’ James didn’t sound as happy as I was hoping he would be. ‘Left it a bit late, haven’t you?’
‘Well, you won’t believe this but there’s this rumour going round my office that you’re gay.’ I stretched my toes out to rest on the heated towel rail. Ooh, damn it, too hot. ‘Isn’t that shocking?’
‘Very funny,’ he echoed. Apparently the bathroom wasn’t the best place to have a mobile phone conversation. ‘So when are you coming over to do this? I’d really like to get it over with.’
‘Oh, thanks,’ I heard Blake call down the line. ‘I’m so glad you’re excited about this.’
‘Shut up,’ James countered, but I could hear a smile in his voice. ‘Seriously though, there is –?according to your terrifying editor – some urgency in the matter.’
‘I know,’ I said, pressing my toes against the cold tiled floor. ‘She has been quite insistent on the urgency. The only thing is, Alex just turned up here and I sort of can’t leave him right now.’ What I failed to add was ‘because I’m terrified that if I leave him alone in this hotel room for even a moment, he’ll find some shred of evidence that I shagged the barman last night.’
‘He showed up, did he? To apologize?’
‘Mm-hm.’
‘Any diamonds accessorizing that apology?’
‘No.’ I couldn’t imagine how I could feel worse than I did right then, but possibly diamonds would have pushed me over the edge. Of the roof. ‘Things are a bit complicated. I have to submit my copy by tomorrow lunchtime so if I came to you about nine, would that be OK? That gives us a couple of hours to talk and then I’ve got another couple to sort it all out.’
‘Are you that good a writer or just that desperate for a seeing-to that you can’t leave your man?’ James asked. ‘And I expect an honest answer, given that I’m about to out myself for you.’
‘Oh, so you’re doing this for her now?’ Blake again.
‘Do I have to bring him on the interview?’ James asked. ‘He’s been bloody intolerable since I agreed to all of this. There’s still time to change my mind, isn’t there?’
‘No there isn’t,’ I said quickly. ‘So we’ll do it at your hotel?’
‘Fine, it’s where all the best scandal goes down.’ I heard a scuffling in the background and then giggling. ‘Sorry, Blake’s freaking out that I’m actually organizing something myself. Piss off; you’re supposed to be organizing the photo shoot, not listening in on my conversation. Have to say, Miss Clark, I’m a bit gutted you’re not going to be in the pics.’
‘I’ve been in quite enough pictures with you,’ I replied. ‘See you tomorrow at nine, then?’
‘OK,’ he said. ‘And Angela, I am really sorry for all the hassle. Hopefully it’s all going to work out for the best. For both of us.’
I tried to smile as I ended the call, happy for James and Blake that they were together, but I was still pissed about the fact that if those photos of James and me had never leaked, I would probably never have ended up in bed with Joe in the first place. I paused between phone calls to wash and moisturize, my skin had got so dried out here. Smoothing on an inch-think layer of Beauty Flash Balm, I stared back at myself in the mirror.
I didn’t look any different for having had a skanky one-night stand, so why did I feel so different? Same blue eyes, same light brown hair, same ‘not bad really but would definitely get veneers if I ever got mega-rich’ teeth. If only I could remember what had happened, maybe I could stop imagining the worst. Unless it had been the worst and my brain was trying to protect what little self-esteem I had left. And the worst thing was, as much as I could complain about James and the photos, about Joe taking advantage, there really was no one to blame for all this but myself. I was going to sort it out myself. With a little help from Jenny.
I dialled her mobile and got her answer phone. The first time that girl answered her phone herself, the world would end. ‘Hi Jenny, it’s me. So I don’t know where you are but I really need to talk to you. Alex just turned up – he’s here in my room and I don’t know what to do. I’m totally freaking out about the whole … situation. Help? Please?’
‘Hey,’ Alex said, curling his long body around the door, ‘you OK?’
‘I thought you were asleep,’ I said, quickly wiping away the smears of moisturizer all over my face. ‘I was just sorting out some stuff.’
‘That’s cool, you don’t need to tell me.’ He stretched up, gripping the top of the frame, his T-shirt pulling up over the waistband of his jeans and revealing his tight, pale abs. Good job I was holding on to the sink. ‘So my body clock is totally wrecked and now I’m starving. You want to eat?’
‘I am actually really hungry.’ I couldn’t remember when I’d last eaten. ‘Do you want to go out?’
Alex let go of the doorframe and stepped tentatively into the bathroom. He smiled and wiped away a little leftover moisturizer from my cheek, making me flush from head to toe.
‘Do you?’
I shook my head. ‘Not really.’
‘Me either.’ He pulled off his shirt and unfastened his belt buckle. ‘But I do need to take a shower. You coming in?’
I looked at the floor. Why was he making this so difficult for me? The empty sick feeling in my stomach eased into tickling butterflies. Before I could say anything, Alex was right there, kissing me so hard, my lips felt bruised and my breath was knocked clean out of me. As he hooked his hands under my arms and pushed me up against the sink, I wrapped my legs around his waist, kissing him back. Maybe this was the best way to clear my head. It certainly felt like a good idea. Not that I could really use that as an indicator of good ideas, given my previous.
I was vaguely aware that I’d knocked on the tap as a startling stream of cold water ran down my lower back, but I was so busy helping Alex yank my T-shirt up and over my head that I didn’t really mind. Instead of trying to turn it off, I let myself twist my fingers into his hair, just like I’d wanted to ever since he’d walked through my door. I held on tightly around his neck as Alex staggered backwards, sliding me off the sink and clattering into the towel rail.
‘Is this OK?’ He breathed hard in between kisses that made my knees weak. So weak that getting to the floor as soon as possible was really the only solution.
‘I thought I was the one who talked too much,’ I replied, pulling him down onto the cold, hard tiles.
‘I can’t believe that guy is gay,’ Alex said afterwards as we lay on the bathroom floor, draped in The Hollywood’s fluffy towels. I wasn’t sure my legs were up to making it across the room anyway, and it seemed as if it would be unflattering to crawl. Not to mention the fact that having two men in
