tables glanced their way. She closed her eyes, her chest rising and falling as she took a deep breath and let it out. “Look at it from my perspective. I thought I had earned that scholarship. I worked hard in college and applied for every financial aid opportunity under the sun. And then to find out that my scholarship had nothing to do with merit or anything else I’d done…”
His stomach tightened. “Why didn’t you say anything while we were together?”
“Because I didn’t know where the money came from. Not until the day of my graduation.” She toyed with her fork, eyes not meeting his.
“You didn’t know until…”
Everything fell into place in an instant: why she’d thrown their relationship away with a haughty look of disdain, why she hadn’t wanted to talk about anything.
But it was only money.
“No, and you went out with me and never said a single word about it the whole time we were together.” Her eyes did come up this time. “I felt so humiliated. My rich boyfriend’s parents paid my way through one of the best medical schools in the country. Only no one saw fit to tell me.”
When she put it that way, he could see why she’d been so upset that day. But his parents had certainly felt as if she’d deserved the scholarship—had seen it as an investment in the future. Yes, they had a soft spot for Tessa’s folks—they were good friends, in fact—but they weren’t the kind of people who threw money at a cause they didn’t believe was worthy. They’d expected Clay to work just as hard as they did. And Tessa had made stellar grades. Better than his, even.
His anger faded. He reached across the table, touching her face. “My parents may have paid the tuition, but you’re the one who earned that degree, Tess, not them. I know how many hours you put in studying. And if their scholarship hadn’t paid your way, any other awards agency would have been happy to step up to fill in any gaps. Is it so terrible that it was my mom and dad who happened to set it up?”
Her gaze held his for a long second. “I don’t know what to think. My parents didn’t know about it, either. Wouldn’t it have been easier if they had just told us about everything up front?”
“They probably thought your parents would refuse the money if they knew who it came from. They’re proud. Very much like a certain young doctor I know.” He took his hand away and sat back.
A small smile played about her lips. “I’m just a little proud.”
“Oh, Tessa, if that’s your definition of a little…” He sighed, then fixed her with a look. “You’re going to be a damn good doctor. You already are, in fact. I saw you operate on Mr. Phillips’s leg.”
He hesitated about saying the next thing that came to his mind, but went ahead. “Your mother would be proud of all you’ve accomplished. And I know your dad is. Mom says he talks nonstop about you.”
Tessa’s eyes turned soft and moist, the green glittering like meadow grass covered with dew.
“Thank you.” The words came out a shattered whisper. “My dad and I miss her more than words can say.”
Suddenly his focus slid lower. To the pink lips that had once parted beneath his own. He wanted to part them again… to use his mouth to chase away the pain and grief he heard in her voice.
As if she heard his thoughts, something simmered in the air between them. An electric current that seemed to draw them closer and closer.
If not for the fact that there was a table and plates between them, he might have leaned across and kissed her right then and there—to see if the experience was as heady as he remembered.
But there was a table… along with a whole lot of baggage. So he picked up his fork and speared one of the meatballs on his plate of spaghetti instead. Just because she’d confessed the reasons why she’d broken things off with him, there was no reason to think they could pick up where they left off.
They couldn’t.
Too much time had passed. He had a daughter and an ex-wife. He, more than anyone, should know when to leave well enough alone.
Tessa took a bite of her salad, her gaze now traveling around the room. Time to steer the conversation toward something a little more superficial.
“How is Marcos and everyone over at the studio?”
She smiled. “Still as ornery as ever. They’re excited about the exhibition.” She paused. “Which reminds me, I totally forgot to call him and ask which day would be best.”
“Better sooner than later. Molly saw a movie a few weeks ago about a kid who learns to do all kinds of fancy karate moves. She’s been going on about it nonstop. Capoeira isn’t karate, but I think it would seem like it to her.”
“I’m sure Marcos wouldn’t mind her coming in. I’ll try to ask him sometime tomorrow morning.” Tessa’s lips pursed for a second. “I’m sorry about your divorce.”
The shift back to personal subjects took him by surprise, hitting a little too close to home. “Long-term relationships don’t suit me, evidently.”
She laughed. “You and me both. Your daughter is beautiful, though, so something good came out of it.”
Yes, it had.
“She’s my life.”
Those simple words contained more truth than he’d handed to anyone in ages. They cut to the heart of who he was now, barreling past the flip replies that seemed to come far too easily these days.
He could only hope he and Lizza had spared Molly most of the ugliness that had gone along with their breakup. Those last few months hadn’t been pleasant ones. Thankfully Molly had been too young to understand what the fights and arguments had been about back then—unlike now. He did his best, but he still got a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach whenever it was Lizza’s turn to have her for the weekend.
He wouldn’t put his daughter into a volatile situation like that marriage ever again. Remaining unattached was the best way to guarantee he didn’t. Which meant no kissing of spunky redheads was allowed. Unless it was a single night of summer madness that lasted no longer than that.
Now that he’d settled that he could lean back and enjoy himself.
They ate for the next fifteen minutes, the silence broken only by comments about the food and how good it was. The tension that had filled the operating room and their initial meeting seemed to have faded away. Instead, it felt more like those periods of quiet companionship they’d once shared.
Only this wasn’t four years ago. It was now. And where he’d once walked with confidence, he now needed to tread with care. For Molly’s sake.
And his own.
Tessa’s hand slid over his. “Hey. Thank you for understanding. About what happened all those years ago.”
Clay wasn’t sure he’d call it understanding in the sense that she meant it. Instead, maybe it was an acknowledgment that mistakes had been made on both their parts.
It wasn’t a new day exactly.
