steps a little closer and our hands automatically touch, his tapping mine like we’re playing a clapping game. ‘You sticking round here for a bit? Or are you revising?’
I glance round. ‘I wasn’t really revising. I was watching Mac DeMarco concerts.’
‘Ah. Of course.’
We just sort of stand there for a bit, hands touching, and then Nick brings up a hand to adjust my hair slightly. It hits me suddenly that this is the last day we’re going to be at the same school. Six entire years of being in the same place every weekday are over. The two years we’ve been a couple at school, two years of eating lunch together, sitting in form, hiding in music rooms, I.T. rooms, P.E. changing rooms, two years of going home together, walking when it’s sunny, getting the bus when it’s cold, Nick drawing faces in the window condensation, me falling asleep on his shoulder. It’s all over.
Normally we talk about this stuff – stuff that we get sad about or annoyed about or angry about – but Nick’s really excited about uni so I don’t want to start complaining or make him feel bad. I’ve done more than enough of that in my life, for God’s sake. I just … I’m the one getting left behind, which is kind of crap, really.
We look up when we hear a small ‘click’ and a loud laugh. We turn and Harry is holding Nick’s camera up to us gleefully. ‘So bloody romantic. I can’t believe I’m gonna have to find a new couple to cockblock at uni.’
Nick snatches the camera back. ‘Did you literally just pickpocket me?’
Harry winks and laughs at him before wandering away again. Nick shakes his head and rewinds the camera. ‘God, he’s so irritating.’
‘Where’d you get the camera from?’
‘I bought it. I thought it’d be good to have some actual physical photos to put on my uni wall instead of just crappy photos on my phone.’
I grab it out of his hands and take a picture of him.
‘Hey!’ He grabs it back, grinning. ‘I don’t want pictures of just me. Everyone’ll think I’m obsessed with myself.’
I smile too. ‘I’ll have that one then.’
Nick puts his arm around me. ‘Okay, we need at least one picture together where we look fucking normal.’ He holds the camera up in front of us, the lens facing us, and I say, ‘Let’s be honest, we never look normal,’ and Nick laughs at me while I’m making sure my hair isn’t doing something weird, and then we both smile, and he takes the picture.
‘When I visit you at uni, I’m expecting that one framed,’ I say.
‘Only if you buy me a frame. I’ll have rent to pay.’
‘God, get a job.’
‘What? You mean you’re not going to buy me things now that you have a job? I can’t believe this. Why am I even in this relationship?’
‘I don’t even know, Nick. Why are you still here? It’s been over two years.’
Nick just laughs and kisses me quickly on the cheek, then starts to walk backwards away towards the drinks table. ‘You’re nice to look at.’
I give him the middle finger.
When we first started going out, we didn’t tell people for a while. We didn’t really know how people would react to us, so it was safer to just be low-key. There hadn’t been an openly gay couple in our school, well, ever, as far as we knew, and I’d been bullied a lot when I was outed. So we didn’t hold hands. We didn’t flirt when other people were around. Sometimes I even felt kind of awkward just talking to him in school, just in case someone found out, and started bullying me again, or worse, started bullying Nick too.
Nowadays, we don’t have to be scared here. I hold his hand whenever I want.
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