The Lady Traveller's Guide To Deception With An Unlikely Earl. Victoria Alexander
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“My goodness.” Poppy looked around. “This is identical to my room.”
“I suspect they’re all very much the same.” Gwen settled on the sofa.
“Did you notice nearly everything is bolted to the floor?” Poppy sat down next to Gwen. “How very odd.”
Effie rolled her gaze at the ceiling and took the last spot on the sofa. “Unlike a hotel, this room will tend to roll about with the waves.”
“I knew that.” Indignation sounded in Poppy’s voice. “I simply thought it was curious.”
“It is curious,” Gwen said diplomatically, “as well as to be expected.”
“Was there something in particular you wished to discuss?” Sidney closed the door, took off her coat, and placed it along with her hat and gloves in the cupboard, then perched on the edge of the bed. “I thought we had been quite thorough about our plans.”
“One can never be too prepared for deception,” Effie said firmly.
It did seem they had had endless discussions about how to make Sidney appear as if she was completely familiar with Egypt although none of them was certain exactly how to dampen Sidney’s expected enthusiasm. If they had decided anything at all it was to take their venture one day—one step—at a time.
“I don’t know why, but this feels rather delicate.” Effie glanced at the others then drew a deep breath. “It’s about your husband.”
Sidney stared. “My what?”
“Your husband,” Poppy said. “Your dead husband.”
Sidney laughed. “I don’t have a dead husband.
“We know that, dear. We wouldn’t be having this discussion if you did.” Gwen sighed. “We realized this morning that we had not discussed your husband—dear, dear whatever his name is.”
“He should at least have a name beyond Mr. Gordon,” Effie said. “Someone—Mr. Corbin or the buffoon or someone else entirely—might ask about him.”
“You are supposed to be a widow,” Gwen pointed out. “And widows generally have dead husbands.”
“Not you, of course,” Poppy added, “but most widows. We all do.”
“I had forgotten about the dead husband,” Sidney murmured. This was becoming more and more complicated but, as she wrote as Mrs. Gordon, it probably couldn’t be helped. Not for the first time did she regret the decision to write under an assumed name. It had been at Mr. Cadwallender’s insistence although he had initially proposed she write not as Miss Sidney Honeywell but as Mr. Sidney Gordon, which had struck her as being a traitor to her gender. However, she did agree to become Mrs. Gordon and while she’d never said she was a widow, the world assumed she was.
“You must never forget about the dead husband,” Effie warned. “And he needs a name you can remember.”
Sidney frowned. “I’m certain I’ll be able to remember his name.”
“You’re not very good at remembering names, dear. You do tend to be a bit scattered,” Poppy said gently. “What was your father’s name? You should be able to remember that.”
“My father’s name was Charles.”
Effie glanced at Gwen. “Unless you have any objections.”
“Because my husband’s name was Charles?” Gwen asked. “Don’t be absurd. The world is simply littered with Charleses, a fair number of them dead. Why, if I was bothered by every dead Charles I encountered, I would spend most of my time being out of sorts.” She cast Sidney an affectionate smile. “I daresay my husband would be honored to lend his name to your imaginary husband.” She grinned. “As long as he was handsome and dashing, of course.”
“Of course.” Effie turned to Sidney. “He was, wasn’t he?”
“Goodness, she wouldn’t have married him if he wasn’t. Not that a man’s appearance is as important as his character,” Poppy added quickly, “but, as we are inventing him, we might as well make him as attractive as we want. Or rather as Sidney wants.”
“I don’t see why not.” Effie nodded. “What did he look like, Sidney?”
“I don’t know.” Sidney crossed her arms over her chest. “And I don’t see why this is necessary.”
“Because someone might ask and you need to be prepared. It’s the details in a project like this that make all the difference between acceptance and being found out,” Gwen said firmly. “Now, tell us. What did he look like?”
“Very well.” Sidney sighed. This did seem absurd but the ladies probably had a point. “I suppose he was tall.” She had always thought tall men to be particularly attractive. “With nicely broad shoulders.”
“The result of a passion for out of door activities, no doubt.” Effie nodded. “Go on. What color hair and eyes did he have?”
Sidney thought for a moment. “Blue eyes, I think. No, better yet—gray. Which might seem nondescript but are really quite warm. Yes, that’s good. And they lit up when he smiled. He had a wonderful smile. And his hair...” One wouldn’t think making up a fraudulent husband would be quite this difficult. “Brown perhaps? A light brown.” No, not brown. What goes well with gray eyes? “Or... I know, a dark blond. The color of sand. Oh yes, that’s better. I like that. What do you think?”
All three ladies stared at her with the oddest expression on their faces.
“What is it?” Sidney drew her brows together. “Is he not handsome enough?”
“No, he’s fine,” Poppy said with a weak smile. What on earth was the matter with her?
Gwen cleared her throat. “Now tell us about your life together.”
“I thought we had discussed this as well. My story should be much like the one I created for Millicent.” Sidney sighed. “There really wasn’t much of a life together. I married Mr. Gordon—Charles—when I was eighteen—”
Poppy nodded. “He swept you off your feet.”
“And we immediately set off for Egypt as he was a promising, young archeologist—”
“An excellent place for a honeymoon.” Approval sounded in Effie’s voice.
“And I was determined to be by his side.”
“Most courageous of you,” Gwen said. “Go on.”
“We barely had a few months together before he died tragically.” Sidney paused. “Should I know how he died?”
“Well, you would wouldn’t you? As his wife.” Poppy glanced at the other ladies. “How shall we do away with him?”
“Perhaps a camel sat on him?” Gwen suggested.