The Complete Ruby Redfort Collection. Lauren Child

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out a form – in triplicate – and getting it signed by the correct authority. But the person in charge, what’s-his-name (she had never actually met him), wasn’t in Spectrum today and when was she going to get the opportunity again?

      As she walked past them, the display cases and glass drawers all lit up and Ruby moved past the rows of low glass counters, slowly eyeing their contents. She was looking for something in particular, something she had seen on her first visit to Spectrum. It was in the section devoted to gadgets for use in the ocean.

      The Breathing Buckle.

      To be used underwater. Slip buckle off belt,

      place between teeth and breathe comfortably for 27 minutes, two seconds. Warning! No reserve air canister.

      Ruby could see that this device might well come in handy and she was sure that the person in charge would sign it out if she requested it – so where was the harm in taking it? She was a bona fide agent after all and she had done her dive training. So what was the big deal? She cast her eyes over the other glass drawers and cases. There was an intriguing label next to a small bag that looked to contain marbles.

      LIMPET LIGHTS ALSO KNOWN AS HANSEL AND GRETEL FIND-YOUR-WAY-HOME TRAIL GLOWS.

      Underwater phosphorescent lights to be used to make a trail. Guaranteed not to move. Duration five hours.

      She might as well grab them too while she was at it – since she was going to get in a whole lot of trouble anyway. In for a dime, in for a dollar. She slipped the ‘borrowed’ treasures into her pockets and checked her watch.

      Oops, didn’t mean to be gone so long. The time had slipped through her fingers. Peeping through the spyhole, she checked to make sure the coast was clear before opening the door. Then she walked swiftly down the corridor and up to Department 7, violet zone. She knocked before entering room 324.

      ‘Late!’ said a voice.

      ‘Oh geez,’ said Ruby. ‘Does it have to be you?’

       Chapter 20.

      A real potato head

      RUBY COULDN’T BELIEVE HER DUMB LUCK – was she really going to have to suffer the company of the silent G?

      His name was Froghorn, but the G was silent – something Ruby chose to ignore, which was just one reason their relationship was so bad. The other being that Froghorn was a petty-minded bully. At twenty-three he had been the youngest agent currently in Spectrum employment, but then Ruby had come along and spoiled all that and he was not happy about it.

      ‘You should be grateful little girl – I’m actually handing you some real work on a real case. This is your lucky day.’

      ‘Oh, I’m really stoked,’ said Ruby. ‘Being shut in a tiny room with you is my definition of a lucky day.’

      ‘Oh dear, now you’re getting your hopes too high. I won’t be babysitting, I have important things to work on, and I think even you can manage to listen to tape recordings by yourself.’

      Ruby looked at the desk, covered in batches of tapes.

      ‘What are they?’ she asked.

      ‘You have to listen to them.’

      ‘What are they?’ said Ruby again.

      ‘Tapes – of radio shows, the kind of shows that people with very little musical taste might tune into.’

      Ruby considered this for a moment. Was he talking about what she thought he was talking about?

      ‘I guess you’re referring to Chime Melody?’

      Froghorn wrinkled his nose, evidently surprised that she was aware of the Chime situation. ‘Oh, I’m sorry, no insult intended,’ he said, not the merest hint of apology in his voice. ‘Apparently, you’re a listener?’

      ‘Sure, I listen,’ said Ruby. ‘It’s important to have an open mind, otherwise one walks around like one knows it all when one is actually a total potato head, no insult intended.’

      Froghorn’s mouth went very small, but he chose to ignore Ruby’s jibe.

      ‘There seems to have been some interference of some kind, highbrow music playing on a lowbrow show – it could be accidental, just two radio frequencies clashing. However, due to all the other unusual activity, LB assigned me the job of listening to each and every tape just to make sure there isn’t some underlying voice message or communication.’

      ‘She assigned you? So what am I doing here?’ said Ruby.

      ‘You’re here because I’ve delegated to a junior agent.’

      ‘Are you palming this work off on me Froghorn?’ she said. It was clear he thought it was a dead-end job.

      ‘Not at all, it’s just the kind of chore a less able person should be doing, and your name came to mind. All you have to do is listen, though I realise this is not something you’re skilled at.’

      ‘Jeepers Froghorn, did your mommy not love you enough? You got some serious ego issues man.’

      Froghorn pursed his lips so his mouth went even smaller. He didn’t like this Ruby Redfort girl undermining him. Who did she think she was marching in with her big mouth, mocking him, making him feel stupid?

      ‘Next time, don’t be late.’ The door slammed as he left.

      ‘That’s the best you got? Don’t be late? You need to brush up on your insults potato head,’ said Ruby to no one but herself.

      She stared at the piles of tapes.

      She felt not unlike one of those fairy-tale characters who ends up left with some impossible task – to weave straw into gold or peel 1,500 carrots before dinner time.

      Might as well knuckle down. She inserted the first tape in the machine, put on the headphones and sat back in the chair.

      It was going to be a long, long night.

       Chapter 21.

      Get Zuko

      THE DOOR TO RUBY’S BEDROOM FLUNG OPEN.

      ‘Child, get yourself up and at it; your parent-folks will be arriving home today and I want to get your room looking like a room before your mother has me fired and run out of town.’

      Ruby lifted her head from the pillow and rubbed her eyes. She was exhausted from her long night of listening to Chime Melody’s peculiar sounds.

      Mrs Digby, who of course knew nothing about that, was standing in the doorway, pink rubber gloves up to her elbows, detergent in hand. Through the blur that was Ruby’s eyesight she looked like some kind of gunslinger.

      Ruby groped for the clock. ‘Mrs Digby, it’s only 5.59 in the am, what are you doing?’

      ‘That’s

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