if Samantha regretted what had happened between the two of them—and her disappearing act seemed to imply she did—surely she wouldn’t have woken Daisy up in the middle of the night and just left without saying a word to him? Especially with her ex-husband on the prowl and ready to pounce.
No, Xander was sure Samantha wouldn’t have done that.
But there was no denying she had left his bedroom.
Why?
She’d seemed happy enough the night before, as she had snuggled comfortably in his arms before they both fell into an exhausted sleep.
Damn it. He had been so thoroughly satiated the previous night, so exhausted by their lovemaking after suffering weeks of physical limitations, that he hadn’t even woken when Samantha crept from his bed!
He now ran an agitated hand through his already tousled hair, the tenderness of his scalp reminding him of the way she had tightly gripped his hair when she climaxed a second time as he’d fiercely thrust and pulsed inside her.
Now she had gone, crept from his bed like a thief in the night. As if last night had meant nothing to her. As if he meant nothing to her.
And perhaps he didn’t, Xander realised with a frown, as he recalled their conversation just before they had made love. Their discussion of the problem of her ex-husband, and the way in which he intended dealing with that problem, for both her own and Daisy’s sakes.
Could Samantha have gone to bed with him, made love, out of gratitude for just the thought of that help reaching fruition?
Because he had made it obvious he wanted her, and she hadn’t liked to say no?
* * *
‘Cereal, pancakes, or eggs and bacon?’ Sam prompted briskly as Xander made an appearance in the kitchen doorway just after eight o’clock, her daughter already seated at the breakfast bar eating the last of her pancakes.
It was a grim-faced Xander who looked at her with dark and wary eyes, nothing like the wild and satisfying lover of the night before. Or the relaxed and satiated man Sam had left asleep in bed earlier this morning.
Any more than she looked—or felt—like the uninhibited woman of the night before.
Her cheeks felt warm just thinking of the intimacies the two of them had shared the previous night. ‘Or maybe just your usual coffee?’ she carried on hurriedly as Xander made no reply but just continued to look at her searchingly with those dark and enigmatic eyes.
But searching for what?
Regrets?
Sam had plenty of those!
Rebuke?
She had absolutely nothing to rebuke Xander for, had been a more than willing participant to their lovemaking.
So what was Xander looking for as he gazed at her so intently?
Whatever it was, he didn’t seem to have found it, the expression in his dark eyes becoming even more guarded as he stepped further into the kitchen. ‘Just coffee is fine, thanks,’ he answered as he moved to sit opposite Daisy. ‘How are you this morning, Daisy-flower?’ His voice noticeably softened as he spoke to the little girl.
Sam efficiently poured coffee into a mug and placed it in front of him before collecting up Daisy’s empty plate and returning to tidy up the stove top, her back turned towards the room as tears blurred her vision.
This was awful. Worse than she had even imagined it might be.
In her imaginings there had at least been a stilted conversation between herself and Xander, in which he would say something like you were right, last night was a bad idea, and Sam would urge him to forget about it, as she already had.
The fact that Daisy was present this morning, and would be all weekend, was going to make even that brief conversation difficult, if not impossible.
And Sam wasn’t sure her already frayed nerves could take the added tension, especially if Xander decided to spend time with them this weekend.
Because they weren’t a normal family. And they never could be.
Xander’s past record, of having been involved with a legion of women, clearly spoke for itself, and he certainly hadn’t made any rash declarations of love to Sam the evening before. He hadn’t needed to, she reminded herself, after she had made it more than obvious she’d wanted him as much as he’d wanted her.
She had been a willing scratch to Xander’s itch, at best. And the fact that he meant so much more to her than that wasn’t his problem.
That was something Sam definitely intended keeping to herself.
Xander would run a mile if he thought for one moment that she had feelings for him. Worse, that she had been stupid enough to fall in love with him.
Just the thought of leaving Xander at the end of next week, of never seeing him again, was enough to break her heart.
‘Daisy, how about I put a cartoon on for you?’ Xander suggested lightly as he stood up, very aware of the fact that Samantha was keeping her back turned towards the two of them for a reason; the slight shaking of her shoulders, and the occasional soft sniff he could hear, clearly indicating that she was crying.
Could he feel any more of a heel than he already did? Xander wondered heavily as he accompanied Daisy into the television room and put a film on for her.
He had taken advantage of Samantha last night. Had used her emotions against her—fear of her ex-husband? Her gratitude for Xander’s help? The compassion she felt for his past? Take your pick! And then he’d forgotten all of those things in order to take what he wanted.
The fact that Samantha had left his bed before he had woken up, that she was crying this morning, had to mean that she regretted what had happened between the two of them last night.
And Xander had no idea how to put things right between them.
Did he apologise and tell her that he knew and accepted that last night had been a mistake?
Even if it hadn’t been?
Did he promise her it would never happen again?
A promise, desiring her as much as he still did, that Xander knew he couldn’t keep.
Or did he put her through the even worse embarrassment of being the one to speak first about last night?
No, that last definitely wasn’t going to happen; it would totally humiliate Samantha, and that was the last thing Xander ever wanted her to feel in regards to him or their lovemaking.
What he had wanted to happen was for the two of them to wake up in each other’s arms this morning, to make mind-blowing love again, before they discussed exactly where they were going to go with their relationship.
Except Samantha had already left when he’d woken up this morning.
Consequently there had been no opportunity for a repeat of the night before.
