Amherst’s flirtations and playfulness with her person was indicative of a particular esteem for her, and that he would, when it was all said and done, be willing to accept it.
Even worse, far worse, Grace had thought herself rather clever with her daring subterfuge.
Fool. Wretched, naive, silly fool!
Well, then, she’d set her own course for calamity, hadn’t she? And now, she was entirely alone, cast out onto a rough sea without so much as an oar. What she wouldn’t give to hear Honor’s unsolicited advice now! To hear Prudence play the pianoforte, or Mercy’s gruesome tales of mummies. What she wouldn’t give to sit at her mother’s feet, lay her head on her lap and feel her mother’s sure hand stroke her hair, as she had done when they were girls.
The day of reckoning had come. Grace would be married to a humorless man. Lord, but he couldn’t be more ill-suited for Grace if he woke up every morning with that express desire.
Grace had heard nothing from Merryton in the days since the disaster, not a single kind or unkind word. Not that she expected it, for what would it be? My dear Miss Cabot, thank you kindly for utterly ruining my life.
No, she didn’t expect anything, really, and had tried to push aside her conflicting and terrifying thoughts by methodically packing her belongings into her trunk. She’d folded her stockings into neat little squares, her gowns into bigger squares. Today, she had dressed for her wedding, hardly caring that she broke with tradition by putting away her mourning garb. Wasn’t black too macabre, in spite of how somber she found this day? Didn’t the silver gown seem too sprightly for such an unbearable event? She’d chosen the pale blue gown Mercy had once declared went very well with Grace’s hazel eyes and the brass tones in her hair. Subdued, and yet, it would not appear as if she’d crawled out a dark tomb to wed.
Grace added a chemisette with a collar so that no skin was revealed to her future husband. She knew it was absurd to feign modesty now, but it seemed the thing to do. She pulled her hair into an austere knot at the nape of her neck, and the only jewelry she wore was a strand of pearls about her neck. It had been a gift from her mother on the occasion of her sixteenth birthday, and it made her feel close to her mother now.
A light rap on her door signaled the time had come.
“Oh, dear. I suppose it’s time,” Beatrice said fretfully.
At least there was one bright spot to Grace’s day—she would soon be out from under Beatrice’s tearful gaze. If there was one thing she could not abide, it was the female penchant for the tearful gnashing of teeth. So much time and effort spent in crying! Grace wouldn’t cry. She’d created this mess and, heaven above, she’d suffer the consequences with her head held high. And if she couldn’t manage that, she’d certainly cry in private.
She opened the door to the Brumley butler. “I’m to bring your trunk, miss,” he said.
Grace pointed to it; she couldn’t find the will to even speak. As the butler and a footman took her trunk down, Grace wrapped a cloak around her and picked up her bonnet. She turned to Beatrice and smiled. “Thank you, cousin—for everything.”
Beatrice’s eyes filled with tears. “How lovely you look, dearest. I wish your mother was here to see it.”
Grace smiled ruefully. “I don’t.”
“Tsk,” Beatrice said. “Not even this day could make you any less lovely. You are your mother’s daughter, a true beauty. That man is quite fortunate if you ask me.”
Grace almost laughed. He was so fortunate his life had been ruined.
Beatrice hugged Grace to her. “Mr. Brumley and I will be there to serve as witness, of course.”
Grace gave her a wan smile. She didn’t care who saw her now. All she could think about was marrying him, then being spirited away to Blackwood Hall, which sounded as bleak as her life stretching all the years before her. She toyed with a fantasy that when the scandal had died down, she would run away—from him, from society, surviving by her wits in the wild—
“Oh! I almost forgot! A letter has come for you this very morning!” Beatrice said.
“A letter?” Grace said, brightening.
Beatrice took the letter from her pocket and held it out. Grace instantly recognized Honor’s handwriting. “It’s from Honor!” she exclaimed. “How could she have received my letter so soon? I sent it only yesterday.”
“This one came late last night,” Beatrice said. “It passed yours in the post.”
Grace’s excitement instantly flagged. There would be no proposed escape for her, no promise of help knocking at her door at any moment. She tucked the letter into her reticule.
“Chin up, darling,” Beatrice said as she wrapped her arm around Grace’s shoulders and began to walk with her. “I hear that Blackwood Hall is a grand estate with a dozen guest rooms. After things settle, you might find it to your liking.”
Grace would never find it to her liking, she was certain of that.
In the foyer, Grace fit her bonnet on her head, low over her eyes so that she’d not have to see any happy people walking about, and followed the footman to the small carriage.
“Mr. Brumley and I will be along behind you, darling!” Cousin Beatrice called from the walk when Grace had settled herself inside, and waved her handkerchief at Grace as the carriage pulled away, as if she were going on holiday.
In the carriage, Grace retrieved Honor’s letter and broke the seal.
Dearest Grace,
I pray this letter finds you well. You must forgive me, dearest, for I have been remiss in my duty to write you faithfully as I promised. We’ve been quite well occupied in London. Mamma is no better, but seems to retreat into her private world a bit more each week. It’s rather difficult to keep her calm at times. Hannah was given a tincture by a woman in Covent Garden, of which I did not approve. It does seem to help when Mamma is particularly agitated, and yet I don’t care for it, as the ingredients are not known to us.
Prudence and Mercy are very well. They were made very happy with an invitation to dine at Lady Chatham’s. She has invited all the girls not yet out. I suspect she wants a preview of next Season’s debutantes so that she might begin to meddle before anyone else is allowed the privilege.
I do have a bit of joyous news and I hope you will not be cross with me. Easton and I have married! I regret that I could not get word to you in time, for I would have liked nothing more than to have my dearest sister stand up with me. However, owing to a bit of bothersome scandal, time was of the essence.
Grace gasped. “You didn’t!” she cried. “When?”
We were married a fortnight ago at Augustine’s insistence. We are residing at Easton’s house on Audley Street, but I must honestly inform you that my poor dear husband is near to penniless as he has lost his ship, and he is determined that we will relocate to more modest housing. I do have his word that there will be room for the Cabot girls wherever we might land. When you return from Bath, you must join us! I cannot bear to be apart from you, and you have surely determined by now that yours is a fool’s errand. Come home, Grace, please do come. We all miss you so and we need you desperately. I know you won’t care for this news, but truly, I love Easton with all my
