В погоне за светом. О жизни и работе над фильмами «Взвод», «Полуночный экспресс», «Лицо со шрамом», «Сальвадор». Оливер Стоун
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She grabbed the baby monitor, flicked on the colored shaded night-light and left the nursery. Mouse hunkered down the hall when he saw her. The one-hundred-and-sixty-pound black-and-white Great Dane always stood point at the end of the hall when she was in the nursery with Oliver. The dog pushed his big head against her leg and Cassie rubbed his neck.
“Feel like a snack?” she asked and kept walking.
Mouse followed her through to the kitchen. She gave him a couple of doggy treats and filled up the kettle. Oliver would stay asleep for a few hours, so she had time to make dinner and watch a movie. She rummaged through the pantry and settled on tinned soup and sourdough toast. The dog climbed into his bed by the door and Cassie set about making her meal.
Friday nights always seemed the quietest somehow. In the old days she would have called her best friends, Lauren and Mary-Jayne, to come around and they would have opened a bottle of wine and eaten cheese and crackers and shared stories about their week. But Lauren was recently engaged and making wedding plans with her fiancé. And Mary-Jayne was locked away in her workshop and wouldn’t be around for a week.
And I have Oliver.
Having a baby had changed her priorities. Not that Cassie had ever been much of a party girl. She’d dated Doug for three years before his death and although they hadn’t seen much of one another in the last eighteen months, she had stood by her commitment to their relationship. Being involved with a career soldier had been difficult. However, the long absences and constant worry for his safety hadn’t altered her feelings. She’d loved him, and now she loved their son.
She cranked the lid off the soup tin, poured it into a saucepan and sliced some bread while she waited for the soup to heat up. The baby monitor was quiet and Cassie relaxed when she sat down at the big scrubbed table and ate her dinner. The house was silent, except for its usual creaks and moans. But she loved the house and had lived in it for most of her life.
When her grandfather had fallen ill four years ago and needed full-time care, the house had been sold to an investment buyer to pay for his care and she had become a tenant in her own home. Of course she was grateful to have been able to stay on and lease the property from the new owner.
The new owner had turned out to be Doug and when he briefly returned from his tour and came around to check on the house, they’d quickly fallen for one another. There weren’t fireworks or a rush of crazy heat, but they’d shared something more...something lasting. It was grounded in friendship and Cassie would have happily spent her life with him had fate not intervened. But only months after she’d told him she was pregnant Doug was dead, killed by a sniper in a secret operation along with two other soldiers.
She’d been living in the house ever since, paying the rent and utilities, and had begrudgingly started looking for another place to live while waiting for the home she loved to be pulled out from under her and Oliver.
Because the house now belonged to Doug’s brother, Tanner McCord. She’d met him twice and on both occasions he’d proven to be the disinterested, brooding loner Doug had described. She knew the tension between the two men went back a long way and whenever she’d asked Doug about it he’d quickly dismissed her questions. Now all she could do was wait until she learned what Tanner planned to do with the house. Eight days earlier she’d received an email. He was coming back to Crystal Point. He wanted to see her. He wanted to talk.
He wants to kick me out of my home...
Cassie shuddered. Damn. She should be better prepared. She should have found somewhere else to live. She should have contacted a lawyer again and ascertained whether Oliver had any rights to Doug’s estate. Instead, she’d buried her head in the sand, plastered on her regular happy smile and hoped things would work out. Like a naive fool. As always.
She shook off the unease in her blood and finished her meal. Once she’d eaten and washed up, she left the kitchen, checked the baby, gathered her things and headed for the bathroom. Twenty minutes later she was showered, dried and wearing her comfiest gray sweats. By seven she was in front of the television watching a DVD.
But not even her favorite romantic comedy could hold her attention. She’d had a headache all afternoon, amplified by the increasing funk she’d been in since Tanner’s email had arrived. She was nervous. On edge and restless at the idea of facing him without Doug by her side. And she felt...alone. Something she hadn’t truly experienced since her parents had died. Or since her grandfather had gone into the nursing home. Even when she didn’t see Doug for months at a time she hadn’t labored over being alone. This was something else. Something more. Cassie couldn’t figure why the feeling was so intense. Since Oliver’s birth she hadn’t any time to linger over what she had lost, or the life she’d never have with Doug. But tonight the feelings were acute. Tonight she was lonely.
When her parents had died in a boating accident Cassie had gone to live with her grandfather Neville Duncan. She’d been eight years old and had grieved the loss of her family for a long time. Lauren’s folks had helped, and her granddad had done his best. But it wasn’t like having a family, a mother and father, of her own. With Doug she’d hoped that together they would make a family. But that wasn’t to be. Still, she was determined to tell her son everything she knew about his father. Doug wouldn’t be forgotten.
As for Tanner...she’d deal with whatever happened.
I can make this work.
I have to.
* * *
It was dark out and Tanner McCord had been sitting in the car for over half an hour.
Waiting.
And knowing he should have let the lawyers handle it instead of traveling halfway around the world to see her. They were only connected by her child. Doug’s son. The son his brother would never see.
Tanner drummed his fingers on the steering wheel. It had been over two years since he’d seen her. And that was only the second time since she’d become involved with Doug. But now Doug was gone. And Tanner was home to fulfill the unspoken promise he’d made to his brother.
He looked toward the house. A silhouette passed by a window. Tanner’s stomach lurched and he sucked in a deep breath. His leg ached and he pressed his palm hard into his left thigh. After months of rehab he could finally walk without that damn stick. The pain was worse when he drove for a length of time, and the five-hour haul from Brisbane to Crystal Point after twenty-plus hours in the air crossing the Pacific had taken its toll. He mostly avoided pain meds in favor of massage and physical therapy, but right now needed something to take his mind off the soreness and maintain his focus. Tanner popped a couple of aspirin and waited for the pain to ease as it usually did when he put pressure on the main fracture line.
There was more movement by the window, followed by a light being switched on in the front room. The big, low-set brick-and-tile home was positioned well back from the road and in the fading dusk he’d noticed how overgrown and unkempt the garden was. Tanner could see the flickering light from the television bouncing shadows off the curtains and he wondered if he should wait until morning before disturbing her.
Instead, he got out, pushing past the pain in his leg, and closed the door. Tanner walked across the curb and stalled in the middle of the driveway. Driving for hours had exaggerated his limp and he pulled his leg forward to force a straight stride. When he reached the door he knocked twice and waited. Seconds later