Thankfully, there’d been no sign of Ryan’s presence in the house during the past two weeks, but that didn’t mean he hadn’t been there. Since Eddie’s school wasn’t dismissed until almost four, Allison had ample opportunity to see Ryan without anyone knowing where she was or with whom. The thought terrified Rosie.
“What should we do?” she asked Zach.
“Any suggestions?”
“None,” she admitted.
“Me, neither.”
“I guess we need to talk more about this,” Rosie said. “Figure something out.”
Zach agreed. “Listen,” he said next. “Do you and this Bruce guy get along?”
She was about to remind him that her dating life was none of his concern, but changed her mind. “We get along all right.”
“What do the kids think of him?”
“I haven’t introduced him yet.” She had no intention of doing so, since it was unlikely she’d go out with him a second time.
“Oh.” Zach exhaled slowly. “Rosie, I want you to know I wish you and Bruce well. I sincerely mean that.”
Rosie felt like weeping and she struggled to hang on to her pride. “Thank you,” she murmured. “If Janice makes you happy, then that’s what I want for you, too.”
They were silent for half a minute or so.
“My most important job now is to be a good father to my children,” Zach said.
“The children are what’s most important to me, too,” she told him, but as she replaced the receiver, Rosie wondered if her failure as a wife and mother was what had gotten her into this predicament in the first place.
Pastor Dave Flemming planned to get in one last round of golf before the November rains arrived. Monday was his traditional day off, and he was prepared to take full advantage of the last bit of autumn sunshine. He stepped onto the lush green course at McDougal Woods and, to his surprise, saw Bob Beldon. Bob and his wife, Peggy, had recently started attending Cedar Cove Methodist. Peggy taught a Sunday school class and Bob had agreed to coach the youth basketball team. Dave liked Bob, and Peggy was one of the best cooks he’d ever had the privilege of knowing. The last church social, she’d brought a peach cobbler that had been the talk of the evening.
“Are you looking for a partner?” Bob asked.
“Sure,” Dave said affably; he welcomed the company.
They teed off at the first hole, then jumped into the cart. “Actually, we didn’t meet by accident this afternoon,” Bob admitted. “I called the church, and your secretary told me you were going to be here.”
Without a pause Dave reached for his five iron. “Something on your mind?”
“You could say that.”
Staring at the other man, Dave saw that he was pale, with dark shadows under his eyes. Bob had aged perceptibly in the last little while.
“I was hoping you might be able to give me some advice.”
“I will if I can.”
Bob’s next shot was a slice that went into the trees. He muttered under his breath. “I’m not much good at this.”
Dave was sympathetic. He had a wicked slice of his own, but he didn’t comment, giving Bob the room he needed to speak his mind.
It wasn’t until the fourth hole that Bob said anything more. “I’ve had this recurring nightmare for thirty years—ever since I got back from Nam.”
Dave stood by the golf cart. “Is that what you’d like to discuss?”
Bob nodded and leaned heavily against the cart. “The event in the dream actually happened…I feel all the horror and panic, the numbing fear. I hear it and see it in graphic detail. I…live it all over again.”
He climbed into the golf cart and closed his eyes. “After Nam, I took to the bottle to forget.” His voice was so low it was all Dave could do to make out the words.
“You started drinking?” he clarified.
Bob nodded, opening his eyes. “After my tour of duty, I came back to Peggy. It didn’t take me long to nearly destroy my marriage and my life by hiding behind an alcoholic haze. For a few years I could forget, but soon even the alcohol didn’t help. That was when I went to AA. It’s the only reason I’m sober today.”
Dave was growing concerned. If possible, Bob had gone even paler. “What can I do?” he asked.
“As part of the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous, we’re asked to make amends whenever possible. I can’t undo what happened that day in the jungle. Peggy’s the only one who knows all the details, the only one I’ve ever told. Dan might’ve said something to Grace before he—”
“Dan Sherman?”
Bob nodded again. “We enlisted for Nam after high school as part of the buddy program and went all the way through together.”
“So Dan Sherman was with you in the jungle?”
“Yeah.” Bob drew one hand along his face. “I suspect it’s the reason he shot himself. God knows I was tempted to do it myself, especially in the early days when I was drinking hard. From what I understand, a lot of men have taken that way out. Truth be known, I can understand it.”
“I didn’t realize you and Dan were such good friends.”
“Ever since then, we haven’t been. After the war, Peggy and I moved around a lot. I worked as a plumber on big construction sites. We’ve only been back in Cedar Cove for the last six years.” Bob leaned forward and his arms circled the steering wheel. He stared into the distance. “I don’t mean to burden you with this, but I think I might be in some kind of trouble here.”
“It’s not a burden,” Dave assured him. “Just tell me how I can help.”
Bob’s hands tightened around the steering wheel. “I need to know what I should do.”
“About what happened in the war?”
“Yes…and Dan.”
“There’s nothing we can do for Dan at this point.” Perhaps Bob was thinking he should somehow help Grace, but Dave doubted that.
Bob shook his head. “I know, I know…”
There was something Bob wasn’t telling him, something he was holding back. Dave decided not to pry. Bob would tell him when he was ready.
“Did I mention that sometimes, when I have this nightmare, I’ve gotten out of bed and walked around the house? A couple of years ago, Peggy found me getting ready to go outside. I was still in my pajamas and I was clutching the car keys—completely and totally asleep.”
Dave nodded, hoping his lack of comment would
