a brilliant dad, though. During her years at boarding-school he’d often made excuses for not being able to come to school functions, all of those excuses related to work. Then, when she came home for school holidays, she’d largely been left to her own devices.
If she was strictly honest, things hadn’t been much better when her mother was still alive. A dedicated career woman, Jess Steinway had been totally unprepared for the sacrifices motherhood entailed upon the arrival of an unexpected baby at forty. Sarah had been raised by a succession of impersonal nannies till she went to kindergarten, after which Flora had taken over as carer before and after school. But Flora, warm and chatty though she was, had mostly been too busy with the house to do much more than feed Sarah and make sure she did her homework.
No one had spent quality time with her, or played with her, till Nick had come along.
She turned her head to look at him, a wave of sadness washing through her. Oh, how she wished he was still their chauffeur, and she the little girl who could love him without reservation.
Tears pricked at her eyes, right at that moment when Nick’s head turned her way. She quickly blinked them away, but not before she glimpsed regret in his.
‘Sorry,’ he muttered. ‘I didn’t mean any disrespect for your father. He was a good man and a very generous one. Christmas was his favourite time of year. Did you know that every Christmas he gave huge donations to the various charities round Sydney for the homeless? Because of him, they always had a proper Christmas dinner. And no one, especially the children, went without a present.’
Sarah frowned. ‘I didn’t know that.’ she knew about his good work with young prisoners. And he’d given lots of money to cancer research and cancer support groups. There were a few hospital wings named after him, too. But he’d never mentioned his Christmas donations. ‘I hope his estate is continuing with that tradition, Nick. Do you know if it is?’
‘It wasn’t written into his will, so I do it in his name every year.’
‘You?’
‘Don’t sound so surprised. I am capable of generous gestures, you know. I’m not totally selfish.’
‘I…I never said you were.’
‘But you think it. And, generally speaking, you’d be right.’
‘Don’t be so modest, Nick,’ Flora piped up. ‘You should see the huge plasma television Nick bought Jim and me a few weeks ago, for no reason at all except that he thought we’d like it. It has surround sound and its own built-in DVD. You can tape any number of shows and watch them later, when you have time. Jim’s in seventh heaven, watching cricket and tennis at all hours of the day and night.’
‘Why do you think I bought it?’ Nick quipped. ‘Had to do something to stop my right-hand man from spending every summer’s day glued to that TV, when he should be outside working. My motivation was purely selfish, I assure you. And don’t be expecting anything too expensive for Christmas, because I’m flat broke now.’
‘Oh, go on with you,’ Flora said laughingly.
‘Don’t laugh. I’ve made two dud movies already this year. And I’m damned worried about the one coming out in the New Year. We’ve had a couple of test audiences view it and they said the ending was way too sad. The director reluctantly agreed to reshoot it with a happy ending, but I’ve decided to go with his original vision. If this one flops, I might have to come to Sarah here for a loan.’
Sarah was shocked by this news. She knew better than anyone that Nick’s ego would not survive becoming poor again. ‘I can give you as much as you need, come February. And it won’t be a loan, either.’
‘Lord, what am I going to do with this girl, Flora? I hope you haven’t made any similar offers to this boyfriend of yours. Don’t ever give a man money, Sarah,’ he told her sternly. ‘It brings out the worst in them.’
Sarah shook her head at him. ‘How many times do I have to tell you? Derek doesn’t want my money.’
‘He will, when he sees how much you’ve got.’
‘Not every man is a fortune-hunter, Nick. Now, if you don’t mind, I do not wish to discuss Derek any further. I know there’s no convincing you that no man could possibly love me for myself and not my money, so I’d prefer not to try.’
‘Hear hear,’ Flora agreed. ‘I agree with Sarah. Another piece of caramel slice, love?’
The ringing of Nick’s cellphone was a welcome interruption, not only to his incessant questioning about Derek, but also to her escalating exasperation. Tomorrow was not going to be a pride-saving exercise. It was going to be hell!
‘Hi there,’ she heard Nick say in that voice he reserved for girlfriends. ‘Yeah, that’d be great, Chloe. OK. I’ll pick you up tonight at seven. Bye.’
He clicked off his phone and slipped off the stool. ‘Sorry, folks. Change of plan. Chloe’s had a last-minute invitation to a Christmas Eve party at some bigwig’s place, so I’ll have to dash out and do my present-shopping now. We’ll have to put off that talk till I get back, Sarah.’
‘Fine,’ she said, pretending not to care. But she did. She cared a lot. Not about the talk so much but about his going out this afternoon, then going out with Chloe tonight. Pathetic, really. The way she would accept the crumbs of his company.
‘Don’t forget I want a new car,’ Sarah called after him as he walked away. ‘A yellow one.’
Nick stopped walking, then glanced over his shoulder at her. ‘Yellow,’ he repeated drily. ‘Any particular make?’
She named a top-of-the-range model. ‘Of course. What else?’
When he smiled his amusement at her, Sarah’s heart lightened a little. It was still there, that special bond between them. Because they knew each other.
Chloe didn’t know Nick. Not the real him. She only knew the man who had graced the cover of Australia’s leading financial newspaper last year.
‘I’ll see what I can do,’ he said. ‘Bye, girls.’
‘Bye,’ Sarah trilled back, smiling on the outside whilst inside she was already sinking back into the pit, that moment of pleasurable intimacy wiped away in the face of where Nick would be going tonight.
Do not succumb to jealousy, she lectured herself, or depression. Do not let him do this to you!
‘You don’t still have a thing for Nick, do you, love?’
Flora’s softly delivered question was almost Sarah’s undoing.
Gulping down the sudden lump in her throat, she straightened her spine and adopted what she hoped was a believable expression. ‘No, of course not.’
‘That’s good. Because it would be a mistake. There’s no future for any woman with a man like Nick.’
Sarah laughed a dry little laugh. ‘Don’t you think I know that, Flora?’
‘This Derek chap, is it serious between you two?’
Sarah hesitated
