types.
She turned to Eric on her left and laughed loudly at something he said. Even he looked surprised to have been that amusing. He developed software apps for a living and he and his techie-mate Russell, on her right, had decided their circle of friends really needed to include someone other than the pair of them. And preferably with the X chromosome.
Hence the wine appreciation.
The three of them developed a healthy symbiosis—they honed their flirting skills on her and she let them. It felt good being appreciated by someone and not just tolerated by Zander. Buoyed by their company, she sniffed and she sipped and she spat and she was careful never to quaff in front of Zander. And, it turned out, she had a pretty good nose and palate for identifying wine types. Unlike cooking, which she’d still not really mastered at all. Though, she wasn’t above quietly taking the mickey.
She agitated the wine in her hand until it made large circles in the balloon glass and its aroma climbed. She waved the whole lot under her nose.
‘Truculent. With undertones of—’ she looked around for inspiration and her eyes fell on the earrings of the woman across from her ‘—amber and—’ she searched again and her eyes fell on Zander ‘—oak moss.’
Because that was what he always smelled like to her. One of her forests.
Russell’s eyes narrowed. ‘Really?’
Eric just laughed. ‘She’s lying.’
She leaned closer to both of them. ‘Truly, it just smells like good red wine.’ She tossed her sample back. ‘Yep. Good.’
All three of them laughed and she turned to place her empty glass onto the cleaning tray, but as she did so she lifted her eyes and encountered Zander’s, intense and assessing.
As usual.
Class wound up not long after and she farewelled her friends happily. They always asked her out with them after class. She always declined.
‘You can go,’ Zander said, suddenly close behind her as Eric and Russell left. ‘You’re off the clock.’
She bit down her retort. How typical that about the only thing he’d said to her all evening was boorish. ‘If I wanted to go I would go. I wasn’t waiting for permission.’
‘It’s Friday night.’
‘And this class is my Friday night activity.’ Poor effort though it was. She slid her coat more firmly on and headed onto the street.
He stuck to her heels. ‘They’re going to go off you if you don’t give them something.’
She turned and glared. ‘Something? A bit of leg? A flash of cleavage?’
‘Not what I meant.’ He glowered.
‘I know what you meant. I’m not interested in anything beyond their company in class.’ And—just quietly—the impact it had on Zander. Getting his blood up was at least better than stony silence. ‘This isn’t about dating, remember.’
‘I was wondering if you did.’
She spun and huffed in equal measures. ‘I have to talk to someone. You’re the only person I know and we’re strangers here.’ And increasingly everywhere. ‘Some of them are going to be men. It’s not dating strategy.’
He just grunted. ‘This is my Friday night, too, you know.’
She stared. ‘I do know.’
‘So it would just be useful to keep everything professional. On mission.’
On mission? ‘I’m not allowed to have a good time, at all? Doesn’t that defeat the purpose?’
‘The purpose is you getting back on track. Learning new things. Reinventing.’
A month of standoffishness took its toll. ‘I’m not sure that you appreciate how hard some of this is for me. Walking alone into a room full of people I don’t know. Striking up friendships. I would so much rather be at home curled up with a good book.’
His eyes clouded over. Was he thinking? Or just bored? ‘How hard?’
‘It’s...difficult. I’m not social, like you. I like to meet people, find out about them, but I’m just not really good at it. It’s work.’ And developing those skills was part of her twelve-month plan but it was a case of chicken and egg. She needed the skills to be able to walk into any social situation, but she wasn’t going to develop the skills unless she kept walking into those situations.
He looked truly astonished. ‘I didn’t realise. You make it look so easy.’
Was he kidding? ‘It’s exhausting.’
‘Would it be easier to have a friend along?’
‘Yes.’
‘Let’s do that, then. This isn’t supposed to be punishment. We can tweak the budget.’
It felt like it some nights. She let out a long breath and added yet another humiliation to her very many. ‘I don’t have anyone to bring. Not every week.’ She could probably get any one of her friends away from their parenting responsibilities once, maybe twice. But weekly? Sometimes twice weekly? Not a prayer. This was the sort of thing she used to rely on Dan for.
Her social handbag.
The great mess that was them struck her again. Imagine if he’d said yes...
‘I’m here anyway,’ he said. ‘I’ll do it.’
Her heart flipped like a fish. ‘You wanted to remain impartial.’
‘The situation has changed.’
‘You know you’ll have to speak to me. Not just interview me or record me talking to others.’
Impatience leaked out of him. ‘I’ve been trying to keep things professional.’
‘What’s unprofessional about having the occasional conversation?’
‘If you’re talking to me then you’re not talking to everyone else.’
It was a valid point. She was just as likely to talk to him all night given half a chance. But it didn’t make it feel any better. ‘I promise to multitask. If you promise not to scowl at me the whole time.’
‘I don’t scowl.’
‘You’re doing it now. That’s just going to scare away anyone that comes close enough to talk to.’
‘They’ll just assume I’m one of many dates who are there under sufferance.’
‘A date with a digital recorder?’ He’d started bringing them along to the second and third sessions of each activity. The first was pure reconnaissance.
‘That reminds me. I’m going to start recording next week. We have permission.’
‘Make
