But there she was, seated on the couch with her eyes closed and her head resting against the back cushion. She was asleep, he realized. And since she obviously hadn’t heard him enter, he took the time to study her. Until now, he had only his memory of her—the way she’d looked when he’d first seen her at the ball, a vision wrapped in black satin. The way she’d looked in his room with the firelight reflecting off her hair. The way she’d looked in his bed with her back arched, her skin flushed and her body tangled with his. So many times during the past few months, he told himself that he’d been wrong. She couldn’t possibly be as beautiful as he remembered.
He’d been wrong. She was even more beautiful now. Dark red hair fell in soft waves to frame her face. The face was a perfect oval, her features delicate, the mouth that had made love to him and cried out in pleasure was even more tempting than it had been all those months ago. Dark lashes covered the ghost-blue eyes that had haunted his dreams. The dusting of freckles across the bridge of her nose that saved her from being too perfect made her all the more beautiful to him. But it was the bulge in her stomach and the knowledge that she carried his child that made his chest tighten.
She opened her eyes and stared up at him. Within moments, the lazy slumber dissipated and the wariness was back. She straightened. “I’m sorry. I must have dozed off. I seem to be doing a lot of that lately,” she said.
She did look tired, he realized, and there were faint shadows under her eyes. Suddenly concerned about her and the baby, he began spitting out questions. “Have you told the doctor? What does he say? Is it normal?”
“Yes, I’ve told the doctor. And she says it’s perfectly normal.”
Realizing that he sounded like some panicked idiot instead of a grown man, Jack sat down in the wingback chair across from her. He released a breath and looked over into her worried eyes. “Sorry about that. This has all been a surprise for me.”
“I understand. I was the same way at first, panicking over everything. But I’ve had a while to get used to it.”
“Too bad I can’t say the same thing,” he replied, angered anew that she’d kept the pregnancy a secret from him. “Why didn’t you tell me about the baby? Didn’t you think I had a right to know that I was going to be a father?”
“Of course you do. And I was going to tell you.”
“When? When the baby was graduating from college?”
“I wanted to tell you,” she insisted and he didn’t miss the way she was plucking at the sleeve of the jacket she wore.
“Then why didn’t you?”
“Because I didn’t know how,” she fired back.
“The simple truth would have worked just fine. All you had to do was say that the night we slept together resulted in a child.”
“You’re right, and I apologize,” she said, her voice softer, her expression calmer. She tilted her chin up, straightened her shoulders. “I should have told you. And now that you do know, you should also know that I intend to keep the baby.”
It had never crossed his mind that she wouldn’t, Jack realized. He also realized that she could just as easily have placed the child up for adoption, and if she’d listed the father as unknown, he would never even have known he had a child.
“But just because I’m keeping the baby doesn’t mean I expect anything from you. I don’t. I made the decision on my own and I plan to accept full responsibility. So you don’t have to worry that I’ll make any demands.”
“That was a nice little speech, Lily. Tell me, how long have you been practicing it?” he asked and surprised himself that he managed to sound so calm when inside he was furious.
“I…A while,” she finally said.
Leaning forward, he made sure his eyes were level with hers, and he said, “Whether or not you expect anything from me is irrelevant. I’m that baby’s father and as its father, I not only intend to take financial responsibility for him or her, I also intend to be a part of the child’s life.”
“I see,” was all she said.
It was apparent that he’d thrown her for a loop. But had she really expected him simply to walk away from his responsibility to the baby? To her?
“I’m sure we’ll be able to work something out with visitation,” she offered. “Lots of families do it. Of course, we’ll have to wait until the baby’s older. Then we can set up a schedule where we swap holidays and extra time in the summers.”
“I don’t think you understand what I’m saying, Lily. I intend to be a part of this child’s life from day one—not four or five years down the line.”
“But surely you realize a baby needs to be with its mother,” she insisted and he could hear the thread of alarm in her voice.
“It needs its father, too. I have no intention of being a part-time father, one of those men who has visitation every other weekend and alternates holidays. I want to be a part of it all—the late-night feedings, the first steps. Everything.”
Lily pushed to her feet. “I won’t let you take my baby from me,” she told him, her voice firm, defiance in her eyes. “I don’t care who your family is or how much money you have, I’ll fight you. I’ll fight you with every breath in me before I let you take my baby.”
“It’s our baby, Lily. Our baby.”
She folded her arms protectively over her abdomen. But her eyes never wavered as she spat out, “I mean it, Jack. I’ll fight you every step of the way. I won’t let you take the baby from me.”
Standing, he walked over to her. He had a good six inches on her and knew he could be intimidating. Hadn’t he been told time and again that his strong physical presence was as big an asset in the courtroom as was his skill as a lawyer? But if she was intimidated, Lily didn’t show it. She held her ground, stood with him toe-to-toe. With her claws drawn and her eyes sparking fire, she reminded him of a cornered mama cat, fighting to protect her kitten. And he couldn’t help but admire her for it. “Do you really think I’m such a heartless monster? That I would take our baby from its mother?” he asked.
She eyed him warily. “But you said you wanted to be there for everything.”
“And I do,” he said and touched her cheek. “A baby needs a mother and a father.”
“I don’t understand. The baby can’t be with both of us all the time.”
“Sure it can. All we have to do is get married.”
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