a wobbling about-face, Ava made another pass across the room. “I shouldn’t have taken time off. I’m not used to inactivity.”
“Maybe not, but you’d better rest while you can. After that baby comes, you won’t get a decent night’s sleep.”
Ava ran a hand over her swollen belly, trying to imagine holding the baby in her arms at last. With another month stretching before her like a slow-motion film, she couldn’t stand the thought of spending it twiddling her thumbs or crocheting baby booties. Sorry kid, I’m not that maternal. “I should have stayed in Kenner City.”
“Coulda, shoulda, woulda, good grief, sis. You couldn’t stay in your house and you know it.” Emily was the older sister, and she had a blunt way of telling it like it was, no holding back, no skirting the issue. “If Ben hadn’t run off like the criminal he is, you wouldn’t be here moaning about nothing to do. You’d be painting the baby room and picking out infant furniture together. That is, assuming Ben isn’t guilty like they say he is.”
“Much as I’m sure you’d like him to be guilty and out of my life, Ben didn’t kill Julie Grainger.” She was absolutely certain of that. What she wasn’t so certain of was his affiliation with the Wayne organization and the hit on Vincent Del Gardo. Hadn’t he reported to Jerry Ortiz all this time? And Jerry had been a dirty agent. Did that make Ben a dirty agent? Guilt by association? Jerry had died trying his best to kill Ava for the medal she had in her possession. “Ben, Tom, Julie and Dylan were close friends. He wouldn’t have killed her.”
“Maybe so, but what do you really know about Ben? He could be up to his neck in crime with Nicky Wayne. There’s the note from Julie and the pictures of him with the Wayne organization. The evidence is pretty strong against him.” Emily leaned forward. “He’s lied to you in so many ways, I don’t see how you can defend him now.”
Ava didn’t have a comeback. Ben had lied and hidden things from her from the get-go. And she’d chosen to believe in him anyway. Call it love, call it blind faith. Call it stupidity. Now she was eight months pregnant, Ben was missing, possibly dead and Ava faced a life of raising their baby alone. Her baby would never know her father.
Damn you, Ben! Tears welled in her eyes as she pictured her daughter at five or six years old asking about her father. What would she tell her? Your father was an FBI agent who defected to one of the most notorious crime organizations of the century. Live with that, why don’t you?
“No.” Ava clenched her fist, refusing to believe what others were so quick to grasp on to. “Ben didn’t kill Julie, nor did he have her killed by Boyd Perkins. And I just can’t believe he’s guilty of going bad and working for Nicky Wayne like Ortiz did.” He just couldn’t be a member of the Wayne organization. So what if Julie’s cryptic note and pictures alluded to a more nefarious life. The note could have meant something else entirely.
All of the evidence so far was supposition and conjecture. As a member of the Kenner County Crime Unit, Ava wouldn’t convict him on circumstantial evidence that could be explained away with one interview with the suspect. Even when the evidence had cut her to the core.
Ben hadn’t told her about his activities. Seeing pictures of him with the Wayne organization had been devastating. It was as though he had led an entirely different life than the one he’d had with her. Seeing her husband in those pictures reminded her that she didn’t really know him. The strain of that realization more than his potential part in Del Gardo’s and Julie’s deaths had caused her to go into early labor.
Other than lying to her, the worst crime Ben had committed against Ava was leaving her and their baby. A tear breached the corner of her eye and trickled down her cheek.
“Oh, sweetie, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t let that son of a gun make me mad.” Emily hurried across the floor and wrapped Ava in a hug, smoothing her long red hair down her back. “He’ll come home, you wait. He’ll come home and explain everything to you.”
Ava let her sister hold her, taking comfort in the arms around her. Despite her doubts about Ben and his role in the organized crime world, she missed him lying beside her in their bed. She missed waking up next to him in the morning. She missed sharing the joyous moments of carrying his child, and she hated that he was missing all the changes, as well.
More tears threatened to fall, but Ava gritted her teeth and willed them to dry. She swallowed several times before she could speak. “We’ll be fine. Don’t worry about us.”
“But I am worried. It’s not like you to be so down.”
“I’m sorry, it’s just hard having your home searched over and over for any scrap of evidence leading to the whereabouts of a husband accused of being in a crime organization and responsible for a murder.” She pushed away from her sister and shoved a hand through her hair. “Everyone at work has been super nice about it all. They talk about the baby to my face, although I know they’re talking about the case behind my back.” Another wave of emotion blocked Ava’s throat, forcing more tears from her eyes.
Emily reached out to brush the moisture from Ava’s cheek, smiling at her with that gentle, it’ll-be-all-right look she’d given her as a child with a skinned knee. “But they do talk behind your back and that’s what bothers you?”
Ava raised a hand. “No, they’re just trying not to stress me. They care what happens to me and my baby. They’re my friends and it’s their job to find the truth.” She turned back to the windows and stared out at the brightness lighting the sky above the Strip. “I just wish I knew the truth,” she whispered, swiping at another errant tear. She forced a strained smile to the corners of her mouth and squared her shoulders. “I shouldn’t let it bother me.”
“Shouldn’t let it bother you? How could it not? The bastard—man—is the father of your child.” Emily hugged her from behind.
“Yeah.” Ava stepped away from Emily and dried the tears from her eyes. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’m not normally this weepy.” She couldn’t give in to raging hormones. Her baby needed a mother who was strong and determined to see her through life without a father. “I guess I’m just tired from my walk.”
“You shouldn’t have gone so far. Two miles is a bit much when you’re as far along as you are.”
“And as big as I am, is what you meant to say, isn’t it?” Ava grinned. “Go ahead, your turn to tease me. I did enough when you were pregnant with your two.”
Emily’s mouth twisted. “It’s funny how they drive you nuts and you look forward to having a spare minute without them, but then you miss them so much you can hardly stand it when they’re gone.”
“When is Drew bringing the boys back from his mother’s?” Ava asked. Drew was Emily’s ex-husband.
“Day after tomorrow.” Emily gathered her keys and purse. “I’d have taken them myself if Theresa hadn’t quit the day before we were supposed to leave.”
“They couldn’t find another blackjack dealer to fill in?”
“I wish. I miss my boys when they’re gone.” Emily sighed. “I’ll be home by two-thirty. I’ll have my cell phone on vibrate. If you need me, leave a message. I’ll check it every fifteen minutes.”
“Don’t worry. It isn’t as if the baby’s due yet.”
“You never
