on him yesterday instead of eight years ago.
I don’t love you, Aiden. I never will.
Her parting words still ripped through him like a tropical typhoon, jabbing at the rough scar she’d carved in his heart.
He mentally recoiled from that burning ache, hating the bitter reminder of the love she hadn’t returned, of how she’d walked away, leaving his dreams of a home and family in the dust.
The hellish years he’d spent photographing things most people saw only in their nightmares had honed his recovery skills to a fine point. But recovering from the shock of unexpectedly seeing the only woman he’d ever loved sitting right here, bringing all of the old pain and gagging bitterness to the surface, was damn hard.
She dropped her hand and looked the way he felt when he’d blown a whole roll of film. Tiny lines had formed between her delicate eyebrows and her plump, perfectly made-up mouth—painted in the same pink, totally hot shade she’d always worn—was pressed into a tight line.
“Colleen Stewart,” he drawled, hoping to keep the clawing pain inside him from showing. “That glad to see me?”
She slanted a gaze up at him and smiled a fake little familiar smile, the one she used when she didn’t want to talk, the one he’d seen often and always dreaded. Her intense blue eyes, which reminded him of the sky on a perfect summer day, sparked. “You have no idea.”
He lifted an eyebrow and tightened his jaw. What the hell was her problem? She’d dumped him on his butt, not the other way around.
Even though they’d only dated for two months, he’d been ready to sacrifice his dreams of being an international photojournalist to settle down and marry her, wanting the kind of traditional family he’d grown up in. But she’d blithely shredded his heart. In pain, he’d dived headfirst into another life, which had only led to more pain.
Images of suffering children exploded in his brain. Doggedly, Aiden held the horrific memories at bay, not wanting to go down that familiar, ache-filled road right now. But he would eventually. Oh, yeah, he would. For years while overseas, and even now, his nights had been reserved for that particular torture.
Eventually, his sleepless nights spent in the throes of nightmares had caught up with him and he’d begun to make tactical mistakes, putting his own life at risk. His best friend had given it to him straight—it was time to head home to a job that wasn’t going to cost him, or someone else, their life. Aiden had agreed, unable to function, and came home to something more life-affirming, something meant to eradicate the memories of the babies he couldn’t save.
Joe cleared his throat, dragging Aiden away from his awful memories. Joe looked back and forth between Aiden and Colleen. “You know each other?” He plopped his rotund body back down into his creaky leather chair.
“Oh, yeah,” Colleen muttered, pressing her mouth into a tight smile. “We go way back. Don’t we, Aiden?”
Even though he was bugged by her flip tone, he managed to smile at Joe, not wanting to come off as difficult. He needed this job. Badly. “Colleen and I went to journalism school together.” And I was stupid enough to fall in love with her.
“Ah. Well, good,” Joe said, inclining his head. “Saves the getting-to-know process.” He looked at Colleen. “Colleen, since you’re familiar with how we put these articles together, why don’t you take Aiden to your office and fill him in.” He looked back to Aiden. “And you fill her in on the plans we discussed on the phone.”
Aiden’s stomach plummeted. He jumped his gaze to Joe. “She’s the reporter?”
Joe nodded. “Yup. Is that a problem? She did a great job on ‘The Bridal Chronicles.”’
Damn. Colleen was the last person Aiden wanted to work with, the last person he’d ever wanted to see again. The bone-deep bitterness he’d felt when she’d thrown his proposal back into his face and ended their relationship reared up like a cobra and bit him hard.
There was no way he was going to stir up and relive all kinds of bad feelings—pain, betrayal, bitterness—by working with her.
Slow down, Forbes. This job was his best shot in Portland to gain some attention as a baby photographer. No, he wasn’t about to make waves and come across as difficult to Joe and he wasn’t about to let Colleen take control of his life again. He would find a way to work with her, even if it killed him.
Aiden arranged his mouth into a smile. “No, not at all.”
Joe smiled. “Good. Hey, one more thing. I have to tell you, the photos of the kids you sent in with your portfolio blew me away. Got any more?”
Aiden suppressed a shudder at the mention of the graphic black-and-white pictures of children he’d taken, unable to stop remembering their haunting poignancy. He’d only brought them out to snag this job and never intended to look at or deal with them again. “I gave them to my mom,” he said truthfully. “I have no idea what she’s done with them.” He hoped his tone conveyed how final that explanation was. Nothing could convince him to haul out those photos again.
Joe nodded. “Ah. All right.”
Aiden looked at Colleen, needing to move on to getting started. “You ready?”
Colleen widened her blue eyes, apparently surprised that he was agreeing to work with her. Hell, he was surprised he was agreeing. But this job would be worth it.
After a long pause, she tersely nodded and stood, smoothing her skirt. Aiden couldn’t help giving her a quick once-over. He had to admit she’d matured well. Her once slender college-girl’s body had blossomed into a curvy, womanly shape, displayed perfectly by the figure-hugging, knee-length navy blue skirt and jacket she wore.
He stepped back and gestured for her to pass him. “Ladies first.”
She scooted past, her eyes averted.
Her scent washed over him—fresh, tangy peaches—stirring up his senses as it always had. His male radar kicked into high gear and he watched her walk away, appreciating her long, willowy legs and the way her rounded hips moved beneath her tight skirt.
His blood began to percolate. Great. The absolute last thing he wanted was to get a renewed case of the hots for Colleen. Bad, bad idea.
But, boy, did she look good…
What the hell am I thinking?
He’d returned to Portland to reestablish ties with his large family and to get rid of the guilt and dark memories his time overseas had embedded in his brain. He hadn’t come back to get tangled up in a mess like Colleen. She might call to him on a male level he didn’t have much control over, but there was no damn way he was ever going to let her get close enough to knife him in the heart again.
Feeling marginally better, he said goodbye to Joe and left his office. Nope, Colleen didn’t have the power to affect him any longer.
After the anguish and searing heartache she’d put him through, he’d make sure of it.
“I can’t let him get to me,” Colleen said to herself, a bad habit she’d picked up during her early childhood, before foster care, when her parents were always gone and she hadn’t had anyone else to talk to.
