tried not to let her bad mood spill out over her big brother. He was just trying to be helpful, although this conversation was becoming increasingly frequent—not to mention increasingly annoying.
“I enjoy having a camera in my hand, Colt. You know that.”
“Sure, but every now and again you need to engage with people. You know, create your own memories instead of preserving other people’s.”
With a sigh, Lola cradled the camera in her palm and let it drop to her side. “Fine.” If for no other reason than to get him off her back, she walked to the parking lot. Popping the hatch on her small SUV, she carefully packed her camera back into the worn padded bag.
The sound of crunching gravel whispered behind her, but Lola ignored it. No doubt a late arrival to the festivities. Stepping back, she slammed the door shut, whirled around and barreled straight into a solid wall of muscle.
Her body reacted, shock and awareness crashing through her. Heavy hands gripped her shoulders, steadying her. Electricity crackled across her skin.
A lump formed in her throat. She recognized him long before her gaze could travel up to take in his face. But she knew. Her body remembered. Reacted.
All too much.
Slowly Lola’s gaze tracked up from the center of a wide chest, over unbelievably rounded shoulders, up the long column of a thick throat to the eyes that still haunted her dreams—and her nightmares.
Those familiar smoky grays stared back at her, somber and searching. The impact of him was unexpected. Heat erupted across her skin, radiating out from where he held her like fire consuming paper. The few other times she’d seen him over the years, she’d been prepared. Knew Erik was in town.
Today she wasn’t ready. Her mouth was bone dry. So many emotions careened through her. She had about as much control as a runaway car in the middle of an action movie. Which pissed her off.
Correction—the man touching her like he still had the right to pissed her off.
Jerking away from him, Lola sucked in a harsh breath.
“Lola. It’s good to see you.”
“Erik. I can’t say the same.”
That wasn’t strictly true. Because even as anger—anger she’d been harboring for the last six years—burst through her, she couldn’t stop her gaze from ripping down his body. Cataloging the differences and ensuring herself he was whole and safe.
He was bigger—pure muscle. Considering the work he did now, that was no surprise. Smoke jumping wasn’t for weaklings. It was, however, for daredevils and adrenaline junkies. Erik McKnight was both.
Hurt flashed through his eyes but was gone before she could even blink. Rocking back on his heels, he stuffed both hands into his jeans pockets. “I’m sorry you still feel that way.”
Wow, so he’d finally issued her an apology. Hardly for the right reasons, though.
“What are you doing here?”
“Didn’t your dad or Colt tell you?”
No, obviously they hadn’t. But her anger now had a new direction, and the minute she was finished here they were both going to get a serious tongue lashing. The men in her life were all oblivious morons.
“I’m—” his gaze pulled away, focusing on the sky behind her “—taking a couple months off.”
There was a story there. Six years ago she would have asked for an explanation. Today she didn’t want to care, so she kept her mouth shut.
The smile he flashed her was without any of the humor that usually lit his face. “Came home to spend some time with Mom. Your dad’s letting me pick up some shifts at the station.”
Oh, goody.
Lola nodded, because what else was she supposed to do? “Well, good luck with that.” Hooking her thumb over her shoulder, she said, “I’m just gonna go...”
“...do anything that gets you far away from me.”
“You said it, not me.”
“That doesn’t make it untrue.”
She shrugged. He wasn’t wrong, but her mother had raised her to be too polite to say so.
Putting one foot behind the other, she slowly backed away a short distance before he said, “You look good, Lola. I... I really am glad we ran into each other.”
Was he serious? Lola stared at him for several seconds, searching his face before she realized that he was. Which made the anger bubbling up inside her finally burst free.
“Did you take a hit to the head, Erik? You act like I haven’t been right here for the past six years, exactly where you left me when you ran away. Ran away when my brother was lying in a hospital bed, broken and bleeding.”
“Because I put him there.” Erik’s gruff voice whispered over her, a swell of words that made her insides quake with the memories of those horrible days following Colt’s accident.
“You’re right. You did.” The accusation she’d wanted to scream at him for so long fell between them like a whisper through a quiet church.
But she didn’t feel any better. In fact, the ache in her chest felt worse.
“That, right there, is why I left. I could see it every time you looked at me.”
“See what?”
“Blame.” His stark expression ripped through her. And she’d be lying if she didn’t acknowledge the small part of her that wanted to reach out to him and offer him comfort.
But he was right. She did blame him. For so many things.
A blast of childlike laughter startled her as a couple of kids darted through the corner of the parking lot several feet away.
No, she wasn’t having this conversation here, now. It wasn’t the time.
“Whatever.” Lola started to take a step back again. “It’s ancient history and no longer matters.”
“Lo.” Sean walked up next to her, startling her as he flung an arm around her waist again. This time, she didn’t correct him when his fingers swept dangerously close to her ass.
Erik’s gaze narrowed, taking in the familiarity and comfort of Sean’s embrace. She couldn’t help delighting in his reaction.
But mostly she just wanted this encounter to end.
“I saved you a steak, but I can’t fend off the vultures forever.”
“Great,” she said, looking up into his open expression.
Sean flashed her a smile, understanding and concern running beneath the surface. He squeezed at her hip, reassurance she didn’t need but appreciated. Why couldn’t she want him?
Holding
