times I feel that I am just a proper decoration on his arm,” she blurted out, and then stopped talking. Whatever was going on was between her and Preston? She wasn’t engaged, but she had the feeling he was heading in that direction. It was just his way to be methodical and sure. Unfortunately, that made her feel as if she were one of his business acquisitions.
“But you love him.”
She stopped short, surprised Tom would say such a thing.
At her hesitation, a slow, warm smile broke across his handsome face. He tilted his head slightly to the side, studying her. “Good. I wanted to be clear about that.”
Her heart began to pound. She was unable to look away, captured easily by his gaze. She gripped tight to the ends of her shawl and wrapped them closer. “Wh...why?” She felt as if she were slipping down a deep chasm.
He shifted his hips and moved closer. “Because I don’t like competition.” He splayed his fingers on her upper back, drawing her toward him. Firelight flickered in his eyes and suddenly she was much warmer. He had never kissed her before, although sometimes he had looked at her and she knew he wanted to by the way he studied her mouth. That look made her pulse race, but this...this was so much headier. His lips touched her skin beneath her ear in a soft, warm kiss. Slowly he trailed his lips to her neck under her jaw. He paused for a second—which to her seemed like an eternity—and then with purposeful intent, his gaze still on hers, he pressed his mouth against hers.
The horizon seemed to tilt on its edge and for a moment her breath ceased movement in her lungs. She flushed all over—and then, as she exhaled, a sigh of contentment followed.
“I want to be first in your life, Elizabeth,” he murmured against her lips. “I need to be first.”
“You are,” she breathed, albeit a bit shakily. First kiss, first...
Apparently that was all the encouragement he needed. Tom deepened the kiss. The sparks and crackles from the fire blended into the touch of his mouth as light exploded through her. He teased the seam of her lips with his tongue until she opened her mouth.
Now a new sensation careened through her. Her pulse raced and she melted into a puddle of fire and feeling. She’d never experienced anything so all-consuming. Her bones turned to butter, soft and pliable. She gripped the brass buttons on his uniform, drawing him nearer, reveling in his strength. She feathered her fingers through his hair at the base of his neck, cupping her palm on his warm skin. She wanted him closer.
“Ah, Elizabeth. Had I known...” he murmured into her ear, sending delightful shivers throughout her body. He circled her with his arms and pressed her gently to the blanket.
The first shards of impropriety pricked her conscience.
She froze, tense.
He stopped kissing her immediately. “What is it?”
“We need to stop.” She pushed against his chest. When he moved away, she wiggled away from him. Sitting up, she dragged in a big breath and adjusted her shirtwaist and skirt. Her skin felt hot and tingly—and she knew it was not from the picnic fire.
“Are you all right?” he asked.
Shaken, she wanted to say. Shaken beyond anything she’d ever felt—at him, at herself. “I’m fine. Perhaps, though, we had best start back.”
He sat up, took a deep breath and raked his hand through his hair. For a moment it seemed he wanted to say more but he only nodded and then began returning the napkins and dishes to the wicker basket. He popped up to his feet and carried the basket to the boat.
When he came back, they shook out the sand from the blanket.
“The wind has come up,” he said. “You’d better wrap this around you.”
He helped her into the boat, tucked the blanket around her gently and shoved off, rowing back across the channel as the purple twilight faded away into night. Stars sprinkled the sky with pinpoints of light all the way to the horizon at the sea. He was so quiet. She wished she knew what he was thinking. Her own thoughts were in turmoil. Was it the same for him?
“Tom... I...”
“It’s all right,” he reassured her. “I should get back to my barracks, too.”
In town, the road was a gray ribbon in the twilight, leading out of town. Shadows darkened the boardwalk in front of the store. Across the way, Mrs. Flynn turned up the wick on the lantern in her parlor, letting the light shine out through her front window and onto the road.
At the mercantile’s door, Elizabeth turned to him before going inside.
He pushed aside a strand of her hair, tucking it behind her ear. Something new shone in his eyes...a tenderness she hadn’t noticed before. She wondered if he could see the same thing in her. She raised up on her toes and kissed him on the cheek. “Congratulations on your promotion. I’m so proud of you.”
He stopped her from pulling away with his hands on her shoulders and drew her back to him, wrapping his arms around her once more. “I don’t want to let you go.”
She huffed out a breath. “You have to. They’ve already played taps.”
“I know,” he breathed into the crook of her neck.
“I’m not going anywhere. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
He looked at her and the intensity she saw in his eyes overwhelmed her. “That’s not what I meant.”
“I know,” she whispered. Over the summer her feelings had grown stronger with every innocent moment they’d shared. And now all pretenses to deny her true emotions evaporated. She loved him—and wanted him to know it. “I love you, Tom Barrington.”
At her confession, he hesitated a moment, and then bent down to kiss her long and thorough. She closed her eyes, absorbing the warmth of his lips, enjoying his soft touch.
“I’m on duty tomorrow, but I’ll come afterward.”
She opened her eyes and smiled up at him. It was a promise. “Tomorrow.”
That had been the last time she saw Tom...until now.
It was painful to ponder what had happened all those years ago. She had blurted out her feelings and the thought of it embarrassed her now. Tom had gone to seek his future and never wrote, never tried to contact her. He’d obviously enjoyed the summer on the water and then moved on. It was futile to wish things had been different. He hadn’t cared enough to stay—or ask her to go with him.
She tightened her jaw. It may have taken a while, but she had learned her lesson well. She would not be making a fool of herself again. Not ever.
With surprise, she realized that people in the pews surrounding her had risen and were singing the ending hymn. Quickly she rose and joined in, hoping no one had noticed her lack of interest in the sermon.
* * *
After the service, Elizabeth descended the whitewashed steps of the church, while at the same time tying her straw bonnet ribbons under her chin. The day was sunny but cool, so she tugged her heavy
