am too—” a hiccupy shudder broke up her words “—too pathetic to draw breath.”
Despite her misery, he smiled. “And you’ve reached this conclusion all by yourself? Or did someone or something nudge you in that direction?”
She sniffed, then blinked and after a long drink of water, tugged a tissue from the box and blew. “Someone and something,” she said, mopping up the beautiful mess she’d made of her face and reaching for another tissue.
He didn’t even hesitate. He sat back down beside her and drew her onto his lap again. She snuggled into him like a sleepy kitten, looping her arms around his neck and nestling her head under his chin. Her breath was warm against his chest, her fingers cool where they linked together on his bare shoulder.
He circled her hips with his arms and propped his chin on the top of her head. “Want to just hit me and get it over with?”
“Hit you?”
“For being such an ass.”
“Well, you can’t help what you are.”
“Um…ouch.” But he was grinning at the return of her spunk as he rubbed a hand up and down her arm. “I’m sorry for making you cry like this.”
“Don’t flatter yourself. This isn’t about you.”
He didn’t know which emotion was stronger. Relief or bafflement. “So…you wanna tell me about it?”
“What? So you can say I told you so?”
There was more resignation than anger in her words. And suddenly he knew. Beldon.
“What did he do to you?” he asked with barely leashed rage. “If that rat bastard so much as laid a finger on you against your will, I will personally see to it that for the foreseeable future, the good doctor won’t be able to manage even simple daily tasks—such as blinking, breathing, or eating—without the aid of a professional health care specialist.”
She sniffed out a little laugh. “Relax, Rambo,” she said quietly. “He did nothing to me…but by the way his nurse looked when she came slithering out of his bedroom, I’d say he managed to do plenty to her.”
He only heard one word. “Bedroom? What were you doing in Beldon’s bedroom?”
“That’s what I’m trying to tell you. Nothing. I did nothing in his bedroom. After you left, I went over to his apartment with every intention of going to bed with him…but there wasn’t any room for me there. It seems that ‘Nelson’ Beldon had a very packed schedule today,” she added acidly. “Seduce the town virgin in the afternoon, take his nurse to bed at night.”
Ry opened his mouth. Closed it. What would have come out was a short, concise expletive that would have succinctly summed up his opinion of Beldon but would have shocked her virgin ears.
“What’s wrong with me?” she began, with such a puzzled, pained look his heart did a little more breaking. “What’s wrong with me that I can’t attract a man who will stand up to Travis or even have enough strength of character to—”
“Hey,” he said, cutting her off. “There is nothing wrong with you. Absolutely nothing.”
The breath she let out was long and heavy. It nestled her left breast deeper into his ribs, made the fine hair dusting his pecs flutter, made his skin burn.
“Then why can’t I find someone to love me?”
Oh, God. He closed his eyes, felt the liquid warmth of a single tear spill onto his chest then trickle down to catch on his nipple. Despite her misery, he flashed on an image of her mouth lapping against his skin, licking that tear away.
He squeezed his eyes shut, tried to force the image from his mind…fought not to think about how lush and soft she was, how the only thing separating her skin from his was a layer of silk and a thin thread of common sense that was unraveling with the same speed as the blood rushing to pool at his lap.
“Is it…is it that I’m not pretty enough—”
“Stop,” he interrupted hoarsely. Then dug deep for the right things to say, the right thing to do, when every red blood cell in his body screamed at him to show her right here, right now, just how pretty she was. Just how pretty he could make her feel. And how good he could make both of them feel.
“Beldon’s a jerk, all right? Don’t let what he did or didn’t do diminish the person you are. If a man loves a woman, how she looks is not what’s important. It’s who she is. It’s her mind. Her heart. It’s how she lives her life.”
She sat up slowly, met his eyes with a slow blink of uncertainty, then smiled sadly. “I get it. What you’re saying is that I’m the quintessential blind date. ‘I’ll set you up with Carrie. She’s got a great personality. So, she’s a little too tall. A little too thin. Her breasts aren’t—”’
“Stop it. You are not too tall or too thin. You are perfect. Your breasts are beyond perfect,” he said without thinking…then couldn’t help himself and lowered his gaze to the front of her blouse where the plump fullness of the breasts in question pressed against red silk. And then he couldn’t stop looking as he gave in to a moment of intense, uncontrollable madness. “Your breasts are…dream worthy. Do you have any idea how many nights I’ve dreamed about—” He stopped abruptly, a weak wave of sanity returning with the thimbleful of blood that found its way back to his brain.
He closed his eyes. Let his head fall against the back of the sofa. Swallowing convulsively, he mentally kicked himself for his stupidity.
“You…you’ve dreamed about my…breasts?” she whispered breathlessly.
He made himself open his eyes and look at her. “Lord, yes,” he confessed, the line between lucidity and lunacy growing blurry.
Her eyes were alert now…and a little misty. With excitement, with surprise…with a stunned expectancy that suddenly made her bold and her voice as seductive as velvet. “What did you dream, Ry?”
Slowly he shook his head. Tried…really tried…to bring his libido back to heel. “Not a good idea, bear.”
“What did you dream?” she insisted in a voice made soft by wonder and by a woman’s deadly keen insight that evidently told her he was weakening and fading fast.
Then he was no longer fading. He was gone. Beyond gone…and he didn’t even try to resist. Not the hungry look in her eyes, not the element of suspense that with one thought warned him this was wrong, but tempted him beyond reason with another.
In a hushed and raspy voice, he surrendered. “I dreamed about watching you unbutton your blouse for me.”
He watched her face, watched the hesitant longing darken her eyes… then held his breath when she lifted her hands and with trembling fingers, started undoing the buttons.
He should stop her. He knew he should stop her. But he was only so strong. And he’d been fighting the good fight where this woman was concerned for what seemed like a millennium.
Her head was down when she reached the last button…
