an unexpected pang of envy as she watched them interact. She couldn’t be happier for both of her cousins, even if she’d never thought she wanted what they had. For certain, she’d been shocked and panicked when she’d learned that she had been named Emma’s legal guardian. And in that moment, she’d been certain that she did not want the responsibility of an infant.
Of course, her feelings had soon changed. Now she couldn’t imagine her life without Emma and she refused to worry what Zach’s presence could mean for the status quo she’d established with Olivia’s baby, or what it could mean to the idea that had only recently begun to take root in her mind and her heart of someday having a baby of her own—a brother or a sister for Emma.
Ashley looked over at her. “Where’s Emma?”
“She went home with Zach.” She glanced at her cousin for reassurance. “Please tell me I haven’t made a very big mistake.”
“You haven’t made a very big mistake,” Ashley said obligingly.
The words did little to alleviate her concerns. She chewed on the edge of a thumbnail, as she sometimes did when she was worried, but she didn’t realize she was doing it until Ashley gently tugged her hand away from her mouth.
“He hasn’t been alone with her before,” she said, trying to explain the origin of her concern.
“Then it’s probably time he was.”
“She’s going to be wanting dinner soon,” she suddenly realized. “And I didn’t tell him what to feed her.”
“I’m sure he’ll manage,” Cam told her.
But Paige wasn’t nearly as certain.
“Do you remember the first time you babysat Emma?” Ashley asked her.
She nodded. “I didn’t have a clue.”
“And Emma couldn’t say a word to tell you if she was hungry or thirsty or tired.”
“She doesn’t say much now,” Paige noted.
“Well, Zach looks to me like a man who’s capable of figuring things out. But if you’re really not comfortable with the situation, why don’t you go home, too?”
“Because I want to be here when Megan’s baby is born.”
“Well, if you’re determined to stay, then stop chewing your nails. You’re making me nervous.”
She flushed and pulled her hand away from her mouth again.
Baby steps, Zach reminded himself as he sat Emma on top of the toddler slide.
He had to be patient, to give both Paige and Emma time to get to know him and feel comfortable with him. Unfortunately, that might take more time than he had.
His heart had torn wide open the first time Emma looked at him and started to cry. As ridiculous as he knew it was, he felt as if she’d rejected him. Just the latest in a string of women who had done so.
Heather was the first. Of course, he’d been a lot younger then and his emotions much more vulnerable. She’d been a model, stunningly beautiful, and he’d been blinded by lust. They’d dated for almost two years, and she’d seemed happy enough to be with him so long as he worked around her schedule. She’d even told him that she loved him. But when Zach got his first overseas assignment and their relationship was no longer convenient, she’d unceremoniously dumped him.
The first heartbreak had been as bitter as first love had been sweet, and losing Heather had taught him a valuable if painful lesson. Since then, he’d guarded his heart.
He’d had relationships with other women, of course, but because of his career, none were long-term or serious. His relationship with Olivia had been no different, despite the fact that a baby had been born of it. And yet it hurt to realize that Olivia had rejected him and any efforts he would have made to be a father to their baby by refusing to even tell him about her pregnancy.
Yeah, she’d changed her mind—too many months later—but that knowledge failed to appease him. And although he knew it served no purpose, he couldn’t deny that he was angry with Olivia—furious at the way she’d first cut him out and then blindsided him with the information that he was a father.
Emma slid down the gentle slope, her face split with a wide grin, her blue eyes sparkling. When she giggled it was the purest and happiest sound he’d ever heard. And in that moment, looking at the beautiful little girl Olivia had given birth to, all his residual anger was washed away by a tide of joy and love so huge it took his breath way.
He caught her at the bottom of the slide and it was only when she wriggled that he let her go. He wanted to gather her in his arms and lavish her with all the love and attention he hadn’t been able to give her in the first fourteen months of her life. Of course, he had to get past not just Emma’s uncertainty but Paige’s wary protectiveness first. Definitely not an easy task.
However, he’d never been one to shirk from a challenge.
Except when that challenge was a phone call from his youngest sister, he amended as the phone in his pocket trilled again and Zach ignored it again.
He’d never admit it to her face, but he missed her like crazy and, more than anything when he’d come home from Afghanistan, he’d been looking forward to going out to California and seeing not just Hayden but his whole family again. He hadn’t actually canceled those plans so much as he’d delayed them, and he didn’t want to delay for much longer.
Emma had an extended family who wanted to meet her.
Or they would, when he finally figured out how to tell them that he was a father.
It was past midnight before Paige finally left the hospital, and despite her pleasure at seeing both her cousin and the brand-new baby doing well, she felt tense and uncertain as she drove toward home. She didn’t realize it was worry over Emma that had lingered with her until she got close enough to the house to confirm that her car was in the driveway. She didn’t have to go much farther than that to find both Emma and Zach.
The baby was curled up on one end of the sofa, her favorite blanket clutched in one little fist, the thumb of the other hanging out of her mouth. Zach was on the floor, his back against the sofa. His legs were out straight, his head was tipped back, and one of his hands was resting protectively on the sleeping child’s back. At any other time, the peaceful scene might have warmed her heart, but she was too busy gaping at the chaos around them to fully appreciate the serene image of man and child.
She took another slow and careful survey of the room, stunned. Okay, so maybe she’d wondered how he would fare on his own with the little girl, and maybe she’d even hoped that Emma wouldn’t make things too easy for him. She hadn’t expected the living room to look as if a Category 4 hurricane had torn through it.
But that was exactly how it appeared to Paige, with toys and plastic bowls and sippy cups and clothes and diapers—she sent up a quick prayer that they were at least clean diapers—strewn absolutely everywhere.
She must have gasped because Zach was immediately awake and on his feet, every muscle in his body on alert. He was so tall, so strong, so completely and undeniably male that, for a split second, the disaster zone faded away and there was
