looked up at him. Of all the women in the world that he could have had, why did he pick her? “I guess I just… I guess I was lonely.”
He touched her cheek, brushing away the last remnants of the tears with his thumb.
“All day I have appointments and meetings, and sometimes I just can’t wait to be alone, to have a minute to myself. But then, when I’m finally alone, I feel so…isolated. Does that make sense?”
“Trust me, I know exactly what you mean. And you get used to it. I promise.”
Maybe she didn’t want to get used to it. She wanted them to be a regular family. She wanted it so bad she ached deep in her heart.
“I was going to wait until tomorrow to tell you this,” he said. “My sister invited us to dinner at her residence tomorrow evening.”
“Really?”
“I hope you don’t mind, but I told her we would be there.”
Mind? She was absolutely ecstatic. They would finally share a meal together. Like a real family. Not to mention that she had been eager to get to know her future sister-in-law. “I would love to.”
She was so happy, she nearly burst into tears again. Instead, she rose up on her toes and kissed him. Just a quick, sweet kind of kiss, so he would know how much it meant to her.
But it felt so nice, so…perfect, she kissed him again. This one lasting just a little longer than the first. She felt his arms tighten around her, the flex of his back where her hands rested.
And because the second one was even better than the first, she kissed him again.
And again.
And then she couldn’t stop.
Phillip had Hannah exactly where he wanted her. Her body pressed against him, her arms circling his neck, hands tangled in his hair. And her mouth—damn, what she could do with her mouth. He had never been with a woman who kissed so…earnestly.
He could have her tonight if he wanted, before the wedding, just as he’d planned. So, why did it feel wrong? As if he were somehow betraying her trust?
Since when did he care about anyone but himself?
He wouldn’t be having this problem, this case of an overactive conscience, if she wasn’t so damned honest all the time. If she didn’t walk around with her heart on her sleeve.
He’d told her, just this afternoon, that her honesty would get her into trouble, and she insisted that honesty was a good thing. Well, it was looking like maybe she was right.
Yet here he was, kissing her, touching her, when what he should be doing was telling her no. But, damn, she felt good.
Maybe she didn’t understand the consequences of her actions. Maybe if he pushed just a little further, tempted her just a little bit more, she would realize what she was doing and put on the brakes.
Maybe he could make her tell him no.
He let his hand slide down her back, slowly. Over the dip of her waist, the curve of her hip. Then he went lower, cupping the soft swell of her behind. She whimpered softly, but didn’t attempt to pull away. He took it one step further, pulling her against him, so she would feel exactly what all of this fooling around was doing to him. And, hell, she felt amazing. All soft and warm and sweet smelling. And rather than deter her, his actions seemed only to fuel her determination.
She drew her nails across his skin, arched and rubbed herself against him, and he couldn’t stop the husky sound of need that welled up from his chest.
She had given every indication that she was a virgin, but now he wasn’t so sure. And he didn’t know how he felt about that. He liked the idea that she would be his alone.
Her hands were on his shoulders, his chest, traveling slowly downward, in the direction of his waistband. A few more inches, and he wouldn’t be able to stop.
Virgin or not, how could he, in good conscience, deny Hannah what she told him she wanted—the privilege of waiting for her wedding day?
The truth of the matter was, as good as this felt, as much as she seemed to want this, he couldn’t.
He broke the kiss and backed away, leaving her flush and out of breath. And honestly, he wasn’t faring much better. “We have to stop.”
Her cheeks were red, her voice husky with desire. “Why?”
“Because you don’t want this.”
“Yes, I do. I want us to make love.”
She tried to kiss him again, to touch him, but he manacled her wrists in his hands. “No, you don’t. You’re upset, and it’s affecting your judgment.”
“I’m not upset. Honestly.”
“Hannah, if we let this happen, you’ll regret it.”
“I won’t.”
“It’s only a week.” He could hardly believe what he was saying. That he was the one talking her out of sex. He must have been completely out of his mind.
Her expression said she was thinking the same thing. “Today, next week. What’s the difference?”
“You don’t mean that.”
“Phillip, I want this. Tonight. Right now.”
She tugged against his grip, but he didn’t let go. She could beg and cajole until she was blue, and he still wouldn’t change his mind. And the worst part was that this was all his fault. He had driven her to this by shutting her out of his life.
He’d thought that, by keeping her at a distance, he was doing her a favor. So she wouldn’t get too attached. He could see now that he was only making her miserable. She had left everything familiar to move to a strange country with people she didn’t know, and he’d welcomed her by shutting her out. It’s a wonder she hadn’t packed up and headed back to America.
Sophie was right. He was an idiot.
At the risk of hurting her feelings yet again, he said the only thing he could to get his point across. “Maybe you want it, but I don’t.”
Phillip’s words splashed over her like a bucket of ice water. Was he actually telling her no? He was a man, and didn’t all men inherently want sex? She thought he would jump at the chance.
He let go of her wrists and she took an unsteady step backward. “You’re serious?”
“Believe me when I say, I’m just as surprised as you are.”
This didn’t make sense. He was turned on. All she had to do was look at the front of his pajamas and she could see how aroused he was. Why didn’t he want her? “Did I do something wrong?”
“Oh, no. You did everything right.”
“Then,
