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“I’m sorry.”
She blinked. “For what?”
“My sister, the matchmaker.” He shook his head. “She can’t seem to help it. She’s happily married, she’s having a baby and she’s busy trying to match everyone else up in pairs, too.”
“The Noah’s Ark syndrome,” Julianna suggested.
“Something like that.” He sobered. “She doesn’t realize—” He stopped, and she couldn’t guess what he was thinking. “Well, that everyone isn’t ready for that.”
“I guess not.” She stared down at the coffee she was stirring, not wanting to look at him.
“I hope it didn’t embarrass you.”
She forced herself to meet his gaze. “Of course not. Why would it?”
His brown eyes were filled with nothing but kindness. “After what happened between us back when we were in high school, I thought it might. I’m sure Holly didn’t think about that.”
She managed a smile. “She didn’t, and I didn’t either. It was a long time ago.” Liar, her mind whispered to her. You’ve been thinking of it too often since Ken’s return.
“That doesn’t mean I shouldn’t apologize for acting like a jerk.”
“I barely remember it, but I’m sure you didn’t do anything of the kind.” Please, don’t let him read anything in my voice. “Just forget it.”
“Okay.” He spread his hands, as if to show they were empty. Strong hands, with a barely healed scar across the back of the right one. “It’s gone. Tell me about you. I want to hear all about this search-and-rescue work of yours.”
“There’s nothing to tell.” Ken seemed determined to bring up every painful subject he could tonight. “Angel and I have been working together for several years. She’s really the hero, not me.”
“Quinn said you’d worked all over the place.”
“That might be a slight exaggeration. We go wherever FEMA sends us. Usually we don’t stay more than ten days at a time on a job—after all, we’re all volunteers.”
“Must be a tough ten days, going to where there’s such devastation.”
“Yes.” The word came out short, because the images were drawing closer. “What about you? You must have had some exciting adventures in the military.”
She knew it was the wrong thing to say as soon as the words were out of her mouth, but she’d been desperate to turn the conversation away from her own pain. His face tightened, and he stared down at the scarred tabletop.
“Some.”
Silence stretched between them, colored with pain. Frustration. Bitterness.
Poor Holly. She thought she was doing a good thing, trying to bring her friend and her brother together. She didn’t realize the truth.
The truth was that she and Ken were both fighting something that could very well beat them. She didn’t know what it was for Ken, except that it had something to do with his crash. She knew what it was for her, but she didn’t know what to do about it.
That was what Holly didn’t understand. Neither she nor Ken was ready for matchmaking. She didn’t know about him, but maybe she never would be.
TWO
“Okay, come on. One more time.” Julianna gave an encouraging smile to the new volunteer who was trying to master searching the debris field. They’d stayed on after the team drill for some private practice.
“It’s no good.” The young woman shook her head, wiping her face with a muddy hand. “I can’t get Queenie to cooperate.”
“Queenie’s doing fine.” Julianna patted the golden retriever’s head. “She’s depending on you for direction, Lisa. You just have to make it clear what you want. One more time, and then we’ll quit for the day.”
Jay Nieto, leaning against a pile of lumber, sighed elaborately, and Julianna shot him a reproving look. She was paying the teenager to assist her with the drill not because she needed help, but because Jay, like so many young teens, needed something to keep him off the streets.
“Okay.” Lisa straightened. “One more time.”
Jay, who’d been playing the role of victim, crisscrossed the muddy lot, moving between and over the debris piles. Then he ducked inside one of the concrete pipes and pulled a piece of plywood over the entrance.
Lisa waited a moment, watching Julianna. At her nod, she gave the order to Queenie. The two of them started across the field, Queenie’s plumy tail waving.
“Are they having problems?” Ken spoke for the first time, but she’d been aware of him, standing and watching, for the past hour.
Too aware. It had made her jittery, that steady gaze, and maybe the dogs had picked up on her feelings.
“Not really. Lisa’s a fairly recent volunteer, so she and Queenie don’t have much search experience. But they’ll work it out.”
She nodded, satisfied, as Queenie lifted her head and sniffed, then gave a soft woof.
“There, she’s got it now. Search-and-rescue dogs have to be able to pick up the scent from the air.”
“Angel looks as if she’s thinking she could do it better.” He bent to pat her dog.
“Angel always thinks that.” The dog looked up at the sound of her name, tail wagging.
Queenie had reached the pipe now. She pawed at the board Jay had pulled across the entrance, barking furiously. Lisa joined them and the two of them “discovered” Jay, who climbed out with a bored look.
“Good job, Lisa,” Julianna called. “Reward her now.”
Lisa, hugging Queenie, responded with a brilliant smile.
“You were right to push her to try once more,” Ken observed. “You never want to end a training session on a failure if you can help it.”
“I try. Sometimes it’s a tough call, but I knew they could do it if they just got out of each other’s way. They have a long way to go, but they have the right stuff.”
His smile flickered. “I usually hear that expression about pilots, but I guess it applies. How long will their training take?”
“Two years, if Lisa wants FEMA certification. I’m pushing her to do that. We don’t have nearly enough trained teams available.”
He whistled softly. “I had no idea there was so much to it. If it’s volunteer work, who pays?”
“The volunteer.” That was what most people didn’t understand. “Hours