hanging around outside,’ said Ralph’s mother.
‘What do you take me for!’ she exclaimed.
‘I know Dolly,’ said Ralph’s mother.
‘She likes anything in trousers,’ said Auntie Win.
‘Not everyone likes being a spinster,’ said Joan crossly.
‘Joan!’ exclaimed Ralph’s mother. ‘Don’t speak to your aunt like that.’
‘You’re all men haters! You just want me to end up in a monastery.’
‘A nunnery,’ said Ralph.
‘Oh shut up, toffee nose.’
‘You’re only seventeen,’ said Ralph’s mother.
‘Like Kay,’ chorused Harry and Elsie.
‘Leave off,’ said Ralph’s father. ‘Have a bit of respect for your cousin.’
Joan turned to her uncle and blushed.
‘Ellen, don’t you think you’re being a bit tough on her?’
‘No,’ said Ralph’s mother firmly. ‘Now, you promise you’ll come straight home, or I won’t finish drying off this cardigan.’
‘I promise,’ said Joan sulkily.
Suddenly Ralph’s father pushed back his chair. ‘I’m off, then,’ he announced.
‘But, John,’ said Ralph’s mother.
‘I’m meeting Ted.’
‘Oh,’ said his mother, looking disappointed.
‘I need a drink, especially after today.’
Harry placed his hand on his father’s arm. ‘Dad, don’t forget to ask about me apprenticeship tomorrow.’
‘Don’t give me orders. I’m asking no one nothin’.’
And with that he pushed his way violently past the chairs and walked out into the scullery.
‘Don’t get downhearted, Harry,’ said Elsie in a motherly way. ‘It’ll take him a bit of time.’
Ralph caught his mother’s eye, and they smiled with amusement. ‘I better go and get ready,’ said Joan leaving the table.
Once the two had left, the atmosphere in the room was visibly lighter. Ralph’s mother placed a large teapot on the table and sat down. ‘Now, Ralphie,’ she said eagerly, ‘tell us. What was it like?’
The door flew open again. It was Joan. ‘Don’t forget it’s the blue cardigan,’ she said, and slammed the door behind her.
His mother stood on a chair and pulled the blue cardigan down.
‘I don’t know why she’s so fussy about what colour she wears,’ said Auntie Win. ‘Who’s going to see it in the pictures?’
‘We’ll wait till she’s gone, love,’ said his mother. ‘Then we can have a proper talk.’
‘Can we have the wireless on?’ said Harry.
‘Why not?’ said Ralph’s mother.
‘Now where’s my cup of tea?’ said Auntie Win.
Ralph climbed into the smelly overalls and peered out of the window. It was now clean enough for him to make out the river more clearly. It had stopped raining and there was a field of lawn to cut. He dragged the motor mower out through the door and attempted to get it to go but the motor still wasn’t responding. With a heavy heart he knew he would have to tell Mrs Egerton-Smythe that he had failed to get it working. He went back to the kitchen entrance and knocked on the door.
Queenie was washing up at the sink. She scowled when she saw him and took her time drying her hands. ‘What you want?’ she snorted.
‘I need to talk to Mrs Egerton-Smythe.’
‘I’ll get her. Stay there,’ she ordered, glancing at his overalls with disdain.
Ralph gazed back towards the mass of swaying grass. It was windy and leaves were being flung into the green undergrowth.
‘Good God!’
Ralph turned, startled. It was Mrs Egerton-Smythe at the doorstep. He opened his mouth to speak.
‘You smell like a rotting cabbage dump! Where the hell did you find those!’ she exclaimed, waving at the overalls.
‘In the shed. I didn’t think you’d mind,’ he began.
‘My God, there’s mould on them!’
Ralph flushed slightly. After years of living in an environment where it was blasphemous to use God’s name in vain, he was aware of feeling vaguely alarmed.
‘Aren’t they damp?’
He nodded.
‘Ass! Why didn’t you say? Is that why you want to talk to me?’
‘No. It’s your motor mower. I can’t get it to work.’
‘Oh, God!’ she exploded and she stormed past him. Ralph glanced upwards waiting for a flash of lightning from the powers that be to strike her, but nothing happened. Feeling awkward he followed her.
She knelt down in the long grass and examined it.
‘I’m sorry,’ he said. ‘I spent ages slotting bits together. I really thought it would work.’
She rose up in front of him, her hands on her hips. ‘Petrol,’ she said.
‘Petrol?’
‘Petrol. That ingredient that used to be a grey-black colour but has now been changed to pink and is commonly known as pool.’ Suddenly she marched off in the direction of her garage. She turned and glared at him. ‘Are you going to stay there like a mildewing statue?’
He ran to join her. She waited outside for him. There was a massive door at the front but she opened the side door. Ralph stepped in after her. There was a smell of petrol, engine oil and leather. She pulled a cord and a swinging light bulb lit up the gloom.
Ralph gasped. Standing jacked up was a large dark green car with a low bonnet. The massive spoked wheels were red. Dazed, Ralph walked round to the front. There on the front of the bonnet, rising up from the radiator cap was an eagle, its wings out-stretched and below its feet a triangle with ‘Alvis’ written on it in silver.
‘She’s beautiful!’ he breathed. Tentatively he touched the two enormous headlamps.
