swallow. I was dizzy. My heart was suddenly pounding so hard in my chest and so loudly in my ears that I couldn’t think properly. My mind and my thoughts, so clear just a mere moment ago, were now as fractured and streaming as the sunlight being refracted by the beautiful diamond being presented to me. What do I do? What do I say? What do I think?
The man I love is asking me to marry him.
This island, our new home, is an absolute paradise.
It’s perfect and he’s perfect.
So why do the obvious words escape me?
What’s not to love about him and this idyllic proposal?
Why am I hesitating and not immediately saying yes?
A searing silence hung in the air between us.
It was like the whole world and time itself had all stopped still.
There was not a breath of wind nor a ripple of movement in the lagoon.
And, instead of thinking with my heart, and saying yes because I love him, my head is once again filled with confusion. All I can think about is how my family who are back home will react? What will they say if I tell them I’m getting married again?
Then my own reservations surfaced too to present their side of the argument.
I’d been married before. So had Ethan. So why do it over again?
Tears welled up in my eyes. I tried desperately to blink them away.
Ethan’s handsome face was becoming oddly distorted.
I fought my panic and conflicting emotions and prepared to explain myself to him.
Perhaps I needed a little more time? Time to think.
Surely there was no urgency or reason for us to rush into anything?
Wasn’t us just being together and loving each other enough?
But when my vision cleared, I could see that his expression had indeed changed from romantically anxious to something that resembled downright furious. His eyes, just a moment ago were soft and loving and kind, were now wide and blazing and murderous.
Had I offended him so badly, with my hesitation, my reluctance?
And then I realised that he wasn’t looking at me at all.
He was looking right past me and over my left shoulder.
So, I turned to follow his distracted gaze and my mouth dropped open in astonishment.
At the far end of the beach, at the headland, where there where some giant boulders, there was also a giant construction crane. There was also a man-made jetty type structure jutting out into the sea with its concrete piles buried into the coral reef.
What the Hell was happening here!?
What about the pristine virgin eco-system? What about the untouched reef?
And what had happened to Ethan’s lawyers securing the hundred-year lease?
Suddenly, Ethan was no longer down on one knee. He was on his feet and running along the beach. I ran after him. My heart racing. My breath dry and rasping in the salt laden air. Sweat pumped and rolled from every pore on my body in the heat and humidity and under the ferocity of the midday sun. When I caught up with him, for a moment we stood side by side, panting in disbelief, at the offending machinery and chaos of construction that had already destroyed a whole section of coral reef. ‘I just don’t understand. It’s supposed to be ours!’ Ethan hissed.
Then, in a glimmering shimmering mirage, I saw a group of people.
Before I could even say a word, Ethan had spotted them too, and he was already scrambling in their direction. Again, I followed him in hot pursuit and saw that there were in fact four people standing in a huddle, perusing a document that looked like it might be a building plan.
There were three men and a woman. Two of the men, wearing hi-vis vests and construction helmets, were obviously the labour workforce here because they appeared to be listening to instructions from the other man. The one doing the talking was tall and well built, deeply tanned, silver haired, and smartly dressed in tailored shorts and a white linen short-sleeved shirt. This man had the air about him of someone incredibly important and affluent.
The woman standing beside him was willowy slim. She was wearing a pale-yellow sundress and large brimmed white straw hat. Beneath the hat, I could see she had a small heart-shaped face and that she had long bright red hair that she wore in a heavy braid over one shoulder. All four wore sunglasses, but still managed to look surprised to see us as we approached them.
I stopped a short distance from them and wrung my hands anxiously. This was awful.
I’d never seen Ethan so angry. Not even that time when we’d come across a gang of rogue fishermen using sticks of dynamite to fish on a coral reef in the Sulu Sea.
‘What the fuck are you doing here?’ He exploded, as soon as he’d got close enough.
The woman whipped off her sunglasses to reveal wide steely grey eyes. She fixed her gaze on Ethan, with what appeared to be familiarity. Then she suddenly started to laugh through her shimmering red lip-gloss. Her laughter sounding like the playful tinkle of sleigh bells. I couldn’t decide if she was brave or incredibly foolish to mock Ethan in such a way. The last time someone had dared to laugh in his face, he’d performed a citizen’s arrest and locked the offender in the hold, until he could be handed over to the authorities at our next port of call.
‘Well, what a surprise. If it isn’t the famous Ethan Goldman!’
Had she recognised him because he was quite famous?
Or did she actually know him?
Oh Lord, please tell me this isn’t another ex-wife!
‘I could ask you the very same question, brother!’ Snapped the smartly dressed man.
Brother? Was that a term of endearment or was this man Ethan’s actual brother?!
I narrowed my eyes and recognised the line of this man’s hair, the broadness of his brow, the strength of his jawline, the shape of his eyebrows, the contour of his profile and the clincher that was his aquiline nose. This man was Ethan but perhaps in ten years’ time.
Otherwise they were clones. Time twins. Doppelgangers.
What did this mean exactly?
Did it mean that this man – whom I trust implicitly with my life and whom I love with all my heart and who has caused me so much angst over whether or not to return to my own family and who had just proposed to me with a diamond ring on a perfect beach on bended knee – has blatantly lied to me all this time about his so-called lack of family?
