She gave a tiny shrug. ‘It doesn’t matter where you go or what you do in life, you can’t avoid being hurt. I can play it safe and still manage to get hurt. I can be hit by a bus, stabbed by a patient and I can get my heart broken by a man.’
There was the briefest of pauses and when Finn spoke his voice sounded strangely harsh in the cold night air. ‘And is that what happened to you, Dr Adams? Did you get your heart broken by a man?’
Tension throbbed between them and for a moment Juliet couldn’t find the breath to speak. She pushed the memories back into the past and reminded herself that climbing a mountain was all about moving forward in slow steps. And life was like a mountain. ‘It was just a phrase. Hearts don’t break, Dr McEwan.’ She tilted her head, ignoring the fact that her pulse was dancing a jig. It was the altitude, she told herself. Just the altitude. ‘Arteries get clogged, valves degenerate and muscles weaken and die, but hearts don’t break. You’re a doctor. You should know that.’
He inhaled sharply. ‘I know that there’s a great deal about the human body we don’t understand.’
‘And never will. A bit like life.’ She gave a little shiver and wrapped her arms around her waist. ‘It’s getting cold. I’m going back inside. Goodnight, Dr McEwan.’
Finn’s hesitation was barely perceptible. ‘Goodnight, Dr Adams. Sleep well.’
She knew she wouldn’t and she suspected he knew that, too.
As she walked away, she thought she heard him mutter, ‘And if there’s a lock on your door, use it.’ But she decided that she must have imagined it.
Finn stood still in the dark and the cold and watched Juliet go. He wanted to call her back, wanted to make her stay and talk long into the night until he’d got right inside her head, but instead he kept silent and watched the door swing closed behind her, his last glimpse of her focused on the blonde plait that hung down her back.
The man in him saw soft curves, creamy skin and green eyes that sparked and teased. He saw temptation and seduction in every graceful movement of those long limbs. He saw guts mingled with a vulnerability that could cut a man off at the knees.
The doctor in him wondered whether she had enough body fat to make the strenuous assault on the world’s highest mountain. He knew that about fifteen per cent of body weight was lost after three months at high altitude. He had a better than fair experience of women’s bodies and he was willing to bet money that Dr Adams couldn’t afford to lose fifteen per cent.
Would she make it to the top of Everest?
With a soft curse he reminded himself that her fitness wasn’t his problem.
The fact that she was trekking to one of the most inhospitable places on earth wasn’t his problem.
Finn was used to climbing with strong women and he would never have dreamed of offering assistance unless it was requested. So why was she different? Why did he suddenly have a need to switch teams and anchor himself firmly to her side for the duration of the expedition?
Why did he have a powerful urge to bundle her straight back on that terrifying flight and deliver her safely back to Kathmandu?
Finn let out a vicious curse and reminded himself that feeling over-protective was his problem. She’d made it clear enough that she wouldn’t welcome his interference or his protection.
And he had no right to offer it.
‘Climb, Jules, Climb!’
Juliet was eight years old and clinging to a rockface in frozen terror while her big brother grinned down at her from above. Daniel Adams. Daredevil and wild boy. To her he was a god. Fourteen years old and totally fearless, whereas she could hardly breathe for fear. It gripped her in its jaws like a wild beast, preventing movement, and now she was stuck, clinging to the exposed rockface, paralysed by the enormity of the risk she was taking. ‘I’m going to fall!’
Her fingers tightened in the tiny crack and her toes felt numb.
She was going to let go.
‘You’re not going to fall and even if you do, I’ll catch you because we’re roped together.’ Her brother’s voice was impatient. ‘Look up, not down. Concentrate. Feel the rock. Go for it, Jules, you can do it! You’re my sister!’
A moment of delicious pride mingled with the panic.
She didn’t want to go for it. She just wanted to curl up in a ball away from risk, but she’d discovered that the biggest high on earth was her older brother’s approval. And she couldn’t fall because to fall would be to fail and no one in her family ever failed at anything.
Everyone in her family was bold and fearless and kicked against the life-throttling ropes of convention. And she was going to be the same.
So she closed her eyes and tried to forget the drop beneath her.
She tried to forget that climbing terrified her. She tried to forget that heights made her stomach roll.
And she climbed.
Upwards, towards her brother’s approving smile. Her brother always smiled. And he was still smiling when he lost his footing moments later and plunged headlong down the sheer rockface, dragging her with him into a dark, dark void of terror and death.
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