averted her eyes. “I underestimated how—” she started to say “drugged” and immediately caught herself “—drunk he was and he didn’t realize that I was naive about men. We were both stupid.” She hesitated. “I wasn’t sure how I’d feel about a child who wasn’t planned.” She smiled. “But now he’s my whole world.” Her voice broke off.
“Your path hasn’t been an easy one,” Jon said quietly.
“Nobody’s path is easy. We just do what we have to do, and go on living. I love my son,” she added. “I have to live with the fact that Markie will always be illegitimate.” She looked up at him. “It hurts me. I try to live a conservative life. But it’s not Markie’s fault.”
“Of course not.”
She picked up her purse from the seat she’d occupied. “I’ll get some breakfast and see what they can do for Markie, but I don’t know if I can come in today. I’m very sorry. I should have phoned.”
“I was concerned,” he replied. “Take the day off. If you can’t make it in tomorrow, just let me know, it will be all right. The Bureau doesn’t punish people for personal emergencies, you know,” he offered with a kind smile.
She smiled back. “Thanks,” she said.
“Markie’s father, is he still alive?”
The question hit her unexpectedly. “I … I don’t know,” she stammered, desperate for a way out of the conversation.
“You said that he was in the military, stationed overseas,” he began.
“Yes, I see,” she faltered. She averted her eyes. “He was, uh, listed as missing in action.”
“A tragedy.”
She nodded. “Thanks for coming down here,” she said, recovering her poise. “I don’t know how you even found us …”
“Abuse of power,” he quipped. He grinned. “I can pull strings when I want to.”
“Unethical, sir,” she pointed out.
He shrugged. “My brother is corrupting me.”
She laughed. She glanced at the big clock in the waiting room. “You’ve got a meeting with the sheriff about that Oklahoma kidnapping in ten minutes at the courthouse,” she exclaimed, referring to a case in which an agent in another field office had requested some help. FBI offices cooperated on cases from other jurisdictions that overlapped. “You’ll never make it.”
“I’ll make sure I catch all the traffic lights when they’re green.” He chuckled.
“Thanks again.”
“You’re welcome. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
She nodded. She watched him walk away. It surprised her that he cared enough to hunt her down when she didn’t show up for work. And he’d been really concerned. That made her feel warm inside. She fought it. His mother would be the worst enemy on earth to make. Joceline already knew how the woman felt about her. It gave her cold chills. But then she was worrying about things she might not ever have to consider. She had her son, and he was going to get better. That had to be her concern now. Only that.
“I’m really sorry about walking in the rain, Mommy,” Markie apologized when they were back home in their small apartment. “I love rain,” he added plaintively.
“I know you do, sweetheart, but your lungs don’t,” she said, trying to explain. “You don’t like being sick.”
He shook his head. “I don’t like making you upset, too.” He dived against her side and held on tight. “I love you so much, Mommy!”
“I love you, too, pumpkin,” she replied and hugged him back, hard.
“I’ll wear my coat next time.”
They both knew he was lying. She’d just have to be more careful. It wasn’t the rain, the doctor had told her, but the fact that Markie was sensitive to viruses and he’d had one starting when he got wet. It wasn’t dangerous for a healthy child, but then, Markie had never been really robust.
The specialist changed his allergy medicines. Joceline talked to the drug company and they agreed voluntarily to give her the inhalers for a fraction of the retail cost. The medication seemed to be working, too. Markie perked up. His valleys and peaks leveled off and he settled into school with resignation. Joceline had a long talk with Markie’s teacher and the owner of the day care, and an attorney who was kind enough to help her pro bono. For the time being, the bullying was curtailed. But they did mention that Markie was distracting in the classroom and set a date for her to come back, alone, and discuss it with them.
Meanwhile, Markie got better and Joceline got her nerves back together. There was still the question of a diagnosis for Markie’s behavioral problems. She didn’t know what to do. There was really nobody who could help except their doctor. She’d asked him about Markie and he agreed that it was possible that the child had attention deficit disorder. He was researching the medications and considering a reply for her.
She was doing well until Cammy Blackhawk stormed into the office and glared at Joceline as if she was a hooker.
“I would like to see my son,” she said haughtily.
Joceline, practiced at handling gruff and unpleasant individuals, gave her a vacant smile. “Of course, ma’am. Won’t you have a seat in our modern and ergonomically designed waiting area?”
Cammy blinked.
Joceline picked up the phone. “Mrs. Blackhawk is here to see you, sir.”
Jon came out the door at once, looking oddly protective as he glanced at Joceline and then at Cammy.
“Hi,” he said.
Cammy stared at Joceline uncomfortably and then back at her son. “I want you to come to supper tonight,” she said firmly. “I’m having a soiree …”
“Soiree?” Jon asked, surprised.
“It’s a French word, sir,” Joceline told him helpfully. “It means a small, informal dinner …”
“I know what it means!” he snapped.
She saluted him.
He rolled his eyes. “Cammy, I can’t come. I’m having supper with Mac and Winnie,” he said firmly.
“Don’t call me Cammy! I’m your mother!” she grumbled.
“And I don’t want to try to eat while I’m being regaled with the latest fashion information,” he continued irritably.
“Many, many people buy specialized magazines to ferret out that information,” Joceline began enthusiastically.
“Do you mind?” Cammy snapped at her. “I am trying to speak to my son!”
Joceline saluted her, too, smiled again and went back to typing on the computer.
“Come
