John Bull, Junior; or, French as She is Traduced. O'Rell Max

      19th July, 1872.

      I ask Mrs. Tribble for my bill.

      I received it immediately; it is a short and comprehensive one:

      I can understand "lodging"; but "board" is a new word to me. I like to know what it is I have to pay for, and I open my dictionary.

      "Board (subst.), planche."

      Planche! Why does the woman charge me for a planche? Oh! I have it—that's the bed, of course.

      My dictionary does not enlighten me on the subject of "Sundries."

      I make a few observations to Mrs. Tribble on the week's bill. This lady explains to me that she has had great misfortunes, that Tribble hardly does any work, and does not contribute a penny toward the household expenses. When he has done a little stroke of business, he takes a holiday, and only reappears when his purse is empty.

      I really cannot undertake to keep Tribble in dolce far niente, and I give Mrs. Tribble notice to leave.