that are met with on the subject. With regard to the kindness we received from the English, particularly the middle class, from whom the character of a nation is always to be learned, it is beyond all expression, and has entailed a heavy debt of gratitude upon us. It would be difficult to enumerate the private benefactions, the benevolent institutions, and the charitable measures, by which our distresses were relieved. The example of individuals induced the Government to assist us by regular allowances; and even when these were granted, private benevolence did not cease.
The Emperor here asked me whether I had been a sharer in the grants supplied by the English Government: I told him that I had felt more pleasure in being indebted for support solely to my own exertions; and that the state of society and encouragement of industry in England were such that with this feeling a man was sure to succeed. On two occasions I had had an opportunity of making my fortune: Colbert, Bishop of Rhodez, a native of Scotland, who was very fond of me, proposed that I should accompany his brother to Jamaica, where he was appointed to the head of the executive power, and where he was one of the most considerable planters. He would have intrusted to me the direction of his property, and would have obtained for me other employment of the same kind. The Bishop assured me that I should make a fortune in three years. I could not, however, prevail on myself to go; I preferred continuing a life of poverty, to removing to a greater distance from the French shore.
“On another occasion,” continued I, “some friends wished to persuade me to go to India, where I should have obtained employment and patronage, and was assured that in a short time I should realize a considerable fortune. But this I declined. I thought myself too old to travel so far. This was twenty years ago; and yet I am now at St. Helena.
“However, there were few who suffered greater hardships than I did at the commencement of my emigration, and who enjoyed greater comforts towards its close. I have more than once found myself on the point of being entirely destitute of every thing. Still I was never discouraged or dejected. I consoled myself with the treasure of philosophy, and compared my own condition with that of numbers around me, who were more wretched than myself: to old men and women, for example, to those who were destitute of education, or who, wanting the faculties requisite for acquiring a foreign language, were thus cut off from all resources. I was young, full of hope, and capable of exertion. I taught what I did not well know myself, whatever was asked of me, and I learned over-night what I might have to teach on the succeeding day. My Historical Atlas was a fortunate idea, which opened to me a mine of gold. At that period, however, I had executed only an outline of my plan; but in London every thing is encouraged, every thing sells; and, moreover, Heaven blessed my exertions. I landed at the mouth of the Thames, and reached London on foot, with only seven louis in my pocket, without a friend, without an introduction, in a foreign land; but I left it in a post-chaise, possessed of 2500 guineas, having gained many dear friends, to serve whom I would gladly have sacrificed my life.”
“But, supposing I had been an emigrant,” said the Emperor, “what would have been my lot?” He took a view of various professions, but decided in favour of a soldier’s life. “I should have fulfilled my career after all,” said he.—“That is not quite certain,” I observed. “Sire, you would have been smothered in the crowd. On arriving at Coblentz in any French corps, you would have been placed according to your rank on the list, without any possibility of getting beyond it; for we were rigid observers of forms,” &c.
The Emperor then enquired when and how I had returned to France. “After the peace of Amiens,” said I, “availing myself of the benefit of your amnesty; yet I joined an English family, and slipped in in a sort of contraband way, in order to reach Paris earlier than I otherwise could have done. Immediately on my arrival there, fearing lest I should compromise that family, I went in person to make my declaration to the police, and received a paper which I was to present for inspection once a week or once a month. I paid no attention to it; but nothing happened to me through my neglect. I had determined on conducting myself with prudence, and therefore felt satisfied that I had nothing to fear. At one time, however, I saw that my intention might have cost me dear: it was during the most violent crisis of the affair of Georges and Pichegru. I usually passed my evenings in the society of intimate friends in my own house; I scarcely ever went out. On this occasion, however, impelled by fate, or, perhaps, by the strong interest which I took in passing events, I strolled about in the Faubourg Saint-Germain till rather a late hour in the evening. I missed the way to the Pont de Louis XVI. which I knew so well, and came out upon the Boulevard des Invalides, without knowing where I was. The posts were everywhere increased in number, and each consisted of a doubled guard. I enquired my way of one of the sentinels, and I distinctly heard his comrade, who was a few yards off, ask him why he had not stopped me; he answered that I was doing no harm. I hastened home as fast as I could, terrified at the danger I had so narrowly escaped. I was in formal contravention to the police: the circumstances of my emigration, my name, my habits, and my opinions, all tended to identify me with the malcontents. Every enquiry that could have been instituted respecting me would have been to my prejudice. I could not have referred to any one; and what alarmed me still more was that they would have found five guineas in my pocket. I had, it is true, been in France two years; but these guineas were the last fruits of my industry: I always carried them about me, and I have them with me still. I used to take a pleasure in seeing them: they reminded me of a period of misfortune which had gone by. It is easy to conceive the conclusions which might have been drawn from so many concurring circumstances. In vain would have been my denials and assertions; no credit would have been given to me. I should, no doubt, have suffered considerably; and yet I was not in the least to blame: such is the justice of men! However, I never took the trouble to arrange my business with the police; and yet I never got into any difficulty.
“When I was presented at your Majesty’s court, the emigrants, who were in the same situation as myself, and had been placed under the superintendence of the police for ten years, applied for their emancipation, which they procured; for my part, I determined to let my surveillance die a natural death. Being invited, in your Majesty’s name, to a fête at Fontainebleau, I thought it would be a good jest to apply to the police for a passport. They agreed that it was, strictly speaking, necessary, but declined giving it, on the ground that it would tend to make government ridiculous. At a subsequent period, having become your Majesty’s Chamberlain, I had occasion to go on a private journey; and they then exempted me from all future formality.
“On your Majesty’s return in 1815, being desirous of serving some emigrants who had returned with the King, I went in their name to the police. Being a Councillor of State, all the registers were open to me. After having inspected the article relating to my friends, I felt a curiosity to refer to my own. I found myself designated as a distinguished courtier of the Comte d’Artois, in London. I could not help reflecting on the differences of times, and the changes produced by revolution. However, my register was altogether incorrect. I certainly visited the Comte d’Artois; but not oftener than once a month. As to my being a courtier, if I had been ever so much inclined to be one, the thing was out of my power. I had to provide for my daily subsistence, and I had pride enough to wish to live by my own industry; my time was therefore valuable.” The Emperor was very much amused by my story, and I felt much pleasure in relating it to him.
The Doris frigate sailed this day for Europe.
28th.—Mr. Balcombe’s family called, in the hope of seeing the Emperor, but he was again indisposed. His health declines; this place is evidently unfavourable to him. He sent for me at three o’clock; he was slightly feverish, but felt himself better. He spoke a good deal of the domestic arrangements of the house, which sometimes annoyed him. He then dressed, with the intention of going out. I persuaded him to resume his flannel under-waistcoat, which he had laid aside very imprudently in this damp and variable climate. We took a walk in the garden, and the conversation continued to turn on the same subject as before. The Emperor strolled about at random, and we came to the gum-trees which run along the park, conversing on our local situation, and our relations with the authorities, and speculating on the political events of Europe. We were overtaken by a shower of rain, and were forced to take shelter under
