She had received, and now carried about with her a letter from this man, in which he asked her to elope with him. She had by no means resolved that she would not do this thing. She had been false to her husband; and as her husband spoke of his confidence in her, her own spirit rebelled against the deceit which she herself was practising.
“I know that I have never made you happy,” she said. “I know that I never can make you happy.”
He looked at her, struck by her altered tone, and saw that her whole manner and demeanour were changed. “I do not understand what you mean,” he said. “I have never complained. You have not made me unhappy.” He was one of those men to whom this was enough. If his wife caused him no uneasiness, what more was he to expect from her? No doubt she might have done much more for him. She might have given him an heir. But he was a just man, and knew that the blank he had drawn was his misfortune, and not her fault.
But now her heart was loosed and she spoke out, at first slowly, but after a while with all the quietness of strong passion. “No, Plantagenet; I shall never make you happy. You have never loved me, nor I you. We have never loved each other for a single moment. I have been wrong to talk to you about spies; I was wrong to go to Lady Monk’s; I have been wrong in everything that I have done; but never so wrong as when I let them persuade me to be your wife!”
“Glencora!”
“Let me speak now, Plantagenet, It is better that I should tell you everything; and I will. I will tell you everything;—everything! I do love Burgo Fitzgerald. I do! I do! I do! How can I help loving him? Have I not loved him from the first,—before I had seen you? Did you not know that it was so? I do love Burgo Fitzgerald, and when I went to Lady Monk’s last night, I had almost made up my mind that I must tell him so, and that I must go away with him and hide myself. But when he came to speak to me—”
“He has asked you to go with him, then?” said the husband, in whose bosom the poison was beginning to take effect, thereby showing that he was neither above nor below humanity.
Glencora was immediately reminded that though she might, if she pleased, tell her own secrets, she ought not, in accordance with her ideas of honour, tell those of her lover. “What need is there of asking, do you think, when people have loved each other as we have done?”
“You wanted to go with him, then?”
“Would it not have been the best for you? Plantagenet, I do not love you;—not as women love their husbands when they do love them. But, before God, my first wish is to free you from the misfortune that I have brought on you.” As she made this attestation she started up from her chair, and coming close to him, took him by the coat. He was startled, and stepped back a pace, but did not speak; and then stood looking at her as she went on.
“What matters it whether I drown myself, or throw myself away by going with such a one as him, so that you might marry again, and have a child? I’d die;—I’d die willingly. How I wish I could die! Plantagenet, I would kill myself if I dared.”
He was a tall man and she was short of stature, so that he stood over her and looked upon her, and now she was looking up into his face with all her eyes. “I would,” she said. “I would—I would! What is there left for me that I should wish to live?”
Softly, slowly, very gradually, as though he were afraid of what he was doing, he put his arm round her waist. “You are wrong in one thing,” he said. “I do love you.”
She shook her head, touching his breast with her hair as she did so.
“I do love you,” he repeated. “If you mean that I am not apt at telling you so, it is true, I know. My mind is running on other things.”
“Yes,” she said; “your mind is running on other things.”
“But I do love you. If you cannot love me, it is a great misfortune to us both. But we need not therefore be disgraced. As for that other thing of which you spoke,—of our having, as yet, no child”—and in saying this he pressed her somewhat closer with his arm—”you allow yourself to think too much of it;—much more of it than I do. I have made no complaints on that head, even within my own breast.”
“I know what your thoughts are, Plantagenet.”
“Believe me that you wrong my thoughts. Of course I have been anxious, and have, perhaps, shown my anxiety by the struggle I have made to hide it. I have never told you what is false, Glencora.”
“No; you are not false!”
“I would rather have you for my wife, childless,—if you will try to love me,—than any other woman, though another might give me an heir. Will you try to love me?”
She was silent. At this moment, after the confession that she had made, she could not bring herself to say that she would even try. Had she said so, she would have seemed to have accepted his forgiveness too easily.
“I think, dear,” he said, still holding her by her waist, “that we had better leave England for a while. I will give up politics for this season. Should you like to go to Switzerland for the summer, or perhaps to some of the German baths, and then on to Italy when the weather is cold enough?” Still she was silent. “Perhaps your friend, Miss Vavasor, would go with us?”
He was killing her by his goodness. She could not speak to him yet; but now, as he mentioned Alice’s name, she gently put up her hand and rested it on the back of his.
At that moment there came a knock at the door;—a sharp knock, which was quickly repeated.
“Come in,” said Mr Palliser, dropping his arm from his wife’s waist, and standing away from her a few yards.
Chapter LIX.
The Duke of St Bungay in Search of a Minister
It was the butler who had knocked,—showing that the knock was of more importance than it would have been had it been struck by the knuckles of the footman in livery. “If you please, sir, the Duke of St Bungay is here.”
“The Duke of St Bungay!” said Mr Palliser, becoming rather red as he heard the announcement.
“Yes, sir, his grace is in the library. He bade me tell you that he particularly wanted to see you; so I told him that you were with my lady.”
“Quite right; tell his grace that I will be with him in two minutes.” Then the butler retired, and Mr Palliser was again alone with his wife.
“I must go now, my dear,” he said; “and perhaps I shall not see you again till the evening.”
“Don’t let me put you out in any way,” she answered.
“Oh no;—you won’t put me out. You will be dressing, I suppose, about nine.”
“I did not mean as to that,” she answered. “You must not think more of Italy. He has come to tell you that you are wanted in the Cabinet.”
Again he turned very red. “It may be so,” he answered, “but though I am wanted, I need not go. But I must not keep the duke waiting. Goodbye.” And he
