true, he means to make a puppet of thee.
Tai. She says your worship means to make a puppet of her.
Pet.
O monstrous arrogance! Thou liest, thou thread, thou thimble,
Thou yard, three-quarters, half-yard, quarter, nail!
Thou flea, thou nit, thou winter-cricket thou!
Brav’d in mine own house with a skein of thread?
Away, thou rag, thou quantity, thou remnant,
Or I shall so bemete thee with thy yard
As thou shalt think on prating whilst thou liv’st!
I tell thee, I, that thou hast marr’d her gown.
Tai.
Your worship is deceiv’d, the gown is made
Just as my master had direction.
Grumio gave order how it should be done.
Gru. I gave him no order, I gave him the stuff.
Tai. But how did you desire it should be made?
Gru. Marry, sir, with needle and thread.
Tai. But did you not request to have it cut?
Gru. Thou hast fac’d many things.
Tai. I have.
Gru. Face not me; thou hast brav’d many men, brave not me; I will neither be fac’d nor brav’d. I say unto thee, I bid thy master cut out the gown, but I did not bid him cut it to pieces. Ergo, thou liest.
Tai. Why, here is the note of the fashion to testify.
Pet. Read it.
Gru. The note lies in ’s throat if he say I said so.
Tai. [Reads.] “Inprimis, a loose-bodied gown”—
Gru. Master, if ever I said loose-bodied gown, sew me in the skirts of it, and beat me to death with a bottom of brown thread. I said a gown.
Pet. Proceed.
Tai. [Reads.] “With a small compass’d cape”—
Gru. I confess the cape.
Tai. [Reads.] “With a trunk sleeve”—
Gru. I confess two sleeves.
Tai. [Reads.] “The sleeves curiously cut.”
Pet. Ay, there’s the villainy.
Gru. Error i’ th’ bill, sir, error i’ th’ bill! I commanded the sleeves should be cut out, and sew’d up again, and that I’ll prove upon thee, though thy little finger be arm’d in a thimble.
Tai. This is true that I say; and I had thee in place where, thou shouldst know it.
Gru. I am for thee straight. Take thou the bill, give me thy mete-yard, and spare not me.
Hor. God-a-mercy, Grumio, then he shall have no odds.
Pet. Well, sir, in brief, the gown is not for me.
Gru. You are i’ th’ right, sir, ’tis for my mistress.
Pet. Go take it up unto thy master’s use.
Gru. Villain, not for thy life! Take up my mistress’ gown for thy master’s use!
Pet. Why, sir, what’s your conceit in that?
Gru.
O, sir, the conceit is deeper than you think for:
Take up my mistress’ gown to his master’s use!
O fie, fie, fie!
Pet. [Aside.]
Hortensio, say thou wilt see the tailor paid.–
Go take it hence, be gone, and say no more.
Hor.
Tailor, I’ll pay thee for thy gown to-morrow,
Take no unkindness of his hasty words
Away, I say, commend me to thy master.
Exit Tailor.
Pet.
Well, come, my Kate, we will unto your father’s
Even in these honest mean habiliments;
Our purses shall be proud, our garments poor,
For ’tis the mind that makes the body rich;
And as the sun breaks through the darkest clouds,
So honor peereth in the meanest habit.
What, is the jay more precious than the lark,
Because his feathers are more beautiful?
Or is the adder better than the eel,
Because his painted skin contents the eye?
O no, good Kate; neither art thou the worse
For this poor furniture and mean array.
If thou accountedst it shame, lay it on me,
And therefore frolic, we will hence forthwith,
To feast and sport us at thy father’s house.
Go call my men, and let us straight to him,
And bring our horses unto Long-lane end;
There will we mount, and thither walk on foot.
Let’s see, I think ’tis now some seven a’ clock,
And well we may come there by dinner-time.
Kath.
I dare assure you, sir, ’tis almost two,
And ’twill be supper-time ere you come there.
