on account of creed, caste or race. In his ashram, untouchables sat side by side with Brahmins and worked together, mostly doing manual labour like building the fortifications against the monsoon floods. According to their tradition, Brahmins only eat food that is separately prepared for them, but with Babaji, they have to eat the same food as everyone else. Also everyone joined together for prayer. There were no separations here either.
Babaji was free and no man-made law could bind him. He had sovereign power over all the laws of nature and over the natural and elemental forces.
People have had many occasions to witness this power of his. For example, there was the time when a religious festival lasting several days was to be held outdoors, and just when it was due to begin, the rain cleared up and only started again when it was over. This was quite unusual as the heavy downpours during the monsoon season occurred daily without fail. When the river at Haidakhan swelled with the heavy rains but was yet to become a raging torrent, Babaji could easily cross the river barefoot and nobody who walked with him was ever in danger. And again, when unexpected visitors arrived at the ashram, the amount of food already prepared would increase miraculously to cater for them abundantly. Always it was the people who wanted to impose some rule or system or other onto the one beyond them all. Sometimes Babaji appeared to go along with them when their conditioning and belief system was too strong to let go of and their present consciousness couldn't yet allow a broader understanding to take place.
There was certainly no evidence of the equality of the sexes in India. Even in Haidakhan, a woman menstruating was forbidden to enter the temple precinct, had to eat alone away from the others, and at no time was supposed to go near Babaji. The woman was deemed unclean and might contaminate, so the temple and Babaji, the very one who was above all, needed to be protected from her. What a massive contradiction! Babaji of course broke these rules at his discretion and let a woman approach him.
***
In Calcutta, one day never resembled the next and one morning, shortly after sunrise, we visited a Kali temple with Babaji. This temple is situated in the old town centre and must be one of the most ancient and holy places in Calcutta.
A popular western Kali interpretation associates the black, long-tongued, all-devouring goddess with ghastly horror stories. But there is more to it than that.
The word 'kal' is masculine, and adding the 'i' makes it feminine. It has a two-fold meaning. The first is time or eternity, and the second is the colour black (representing the unmanifest): out of darkness comes forth light, the world of manifestation, and this creation then returns through death and dissolution back to darkness. All that exists is afraid of its ending and therefore Kali, the Black, is pictured as being frightening. Beyond death and annihilation, eternity rules and only that which is eternal can give lasting happiness and joy. The widespread worship of Kali is understood in India as being the worship of one aspect of Divine Oneness. This is also true in regard to other deities in the Indian pantheon.
The Kali temple was so overcrowded it was impossible to enter. There was a tiny door opposite the statue and we were able to peek in. Our eyes turned to Babaji who stood like a rock in the middle of the writhing melee of bodies pushing and shoving towards Kali. He signalled us to climb through the small opening and reach him that way. For some time we gazed in silence at the statue. She appeared to have been there forever, unaffected by the dizzy world around her. A strong vibration radiated between Babaji and the statue which made me feel faint. Babaji then held out his arm to help us climb out again. When we got back to the house, there were hundreds of people waiting for Babaji, all waiting to receive his darshan.
I sat down and looked on as each person approached Babaji and received his blessings. At one point, I noticed a German man, who apparently had just arrived, handing Babaji some kind of folder. Babaji took a cursory look, closed it, and called out my name.
"This is a manuscript, read it and tell me what it contains."
Back in my seat I opened the file and read some short passages. Tears started to stream down my face. Here was a soul opening to God. The pain of loneliness, the long search and finally bliss at reaching his goal; it was overwhelming. All fell silent within me. I was struck by awe and gratitude for a deeper realization of what it means to come into the presence of Babaji. It opened my heart. I looked to Babaji who had apparently been observing me. He smiled at me and nodded. What the manuscript contained was not so important. Important was the author's inner unfolding. When I later had the opportunity to read it through thoroughly, it had the same effect. The author wanted to know what I thought:
"It is the most beautiful thing you could have offered Babaji!"
Babaji did not listen at all when I tried later to tell him more about the contents of the manuscript. That didn't really surprise me because he already knew what was there; he had held it in his hands. The manuscript had fulfilled its purpose.
Back in my room I wondered about other experiences where Babaji's guidance had opened my heart-chakra. I don't know how he had worked on me. I sensed only the effects. Were they the consequences of his teachings put into practise, I wondered...
At Haidakhan one time during karma yoga, my job was to carry stones. The riverbed is covered with thousands of rocks and stones, of which Babaji said "they are souls". At that time I had no idea that such dense matter as rock could have consciousness. I was picking up stones and carrying them over to another spot where they were needed as building material. Nearby the low stream gurgled onward. It was a hot sunny day. They were everywhere, these sun-warned round stones, as far as the eye could see. I became aware they had some special vibration, some kind of intense, powerful love. It came from the stone in my hand and from all those lying around me. It was a strong lovingness that I hadn't found among human beings. I stopped for a moment to concentrate on this new feeling inside, this marvellous discovery. The entire creation, myself included trembled with love, love that is inherent in everything that exists, love that is buried under most of the time in humans.
How powerful must Babaji's love for humanity be, and now I was experiencing an aspect of this all-embracing love. Soon I became aware of someone standing next to me; it was a woman who had just arrived from Germany. I began to wonder what Babaji feels on seeing his disciple again after a long absence? As I looked at her a powerful wave of love came flooding from my heart and then it was as though my body and everything surrounding were in the midst of luminous fire. What a perfect answer to my question! I had never understood an answer so clearly before.
It was amazing how this feeling arose in me. I could not influence its arising or even steer its course, let alone reach a sense of freedom that comes from love and joy. This was an automatic process. Babaji's voice could evoke many different reactions: joy, compassion, sadness, a rebalancing of the yin yang energies.
Shortly after lunch that same day I sat alone with Babaji near the gate to the temples built just beyond the cave, where he was first discovered in 1970.
He asked, "Are you happy?"
"Yes, ... that much!", I answered, and showed him half an inch with my thumb and finger. Inwardly I thought "I will only be really happy when I'm able to hear your voice within, when I have become one with you."
"What, you're not happy?", he asked.
"Oh yes!", I repeated and showed again with the words "that much" the measure of half an inch. The answer wasn't easy for me.
"Go!", he shouted, with a wild, dismissive fling of the arm and sent me back to the ashram. A flood of sadness threatened to envelop me but this changed in an instant to a feeling of unrestricted joy as I jumped in the air shouting: "I am free, I am free!" I was happy, overjoyed, jubilant.
Like pearls on a string, one heart-opening
