entering the room, I immediately noticed a young yogi deep in meditation. As there was no space left at the back, I had to move to the front and ended up sitting right near him.
Traditionally, our family has always worshipped Shiva, so I began automatically to repeat the mantra OM NAMAH SHIVAYA. It was then that the yogi opened his eyes. His gaze fixed onto mine and it was as if fire streamed forth from his eyes. I sat as if rooted to the spot. How long I remained staring - a minute, an hour - I have no idea. I only became aware of suddenly beginning to cry. Normally, crying doesn't come easily to me; it's beneath my dignity. The whole time, the yogi kept looking at me. At the same time, my father, mother and brother, who were also present, each thought he was looking at them. All three had the same experience. The yogi shut his eyes again and eased into deep meditation.
I was fascinated to watch the people go up and bow down before him and how he, although in profound meditation, would raise his right hand in blessing. This gesture truly touched me - it was Shiva's mudra. Some time later the yogi stood up and returned to his room.
"Who is the Baba? Where does he come from?", I asked someone beside me.
"He is a Mahavatar, the one mentioned in Yogananda's Autobiography of a Yogi".
"It may be possible", I thought. Nevertheless, doubts disturbed me, because of my sceptical nature.
We went home and returned in the evening. Babaji was sitting on the verandah in the moonlight. At last someone arrived with a lamp, which lit up His face. We were, sitting about two or three metres away from Him and the thought occurred to me to photograph Him. In my mind, I asked for His permission and as an answer, I noticed His eyes open. I spoke further with Him internally: "Who you are, I don't know. But if you are truly the one people believe you to be, then show me. This way only can I have faith in you".
My eyes remained spellbound by His face, which became like a kaleidoscope. It transformed into Rama, Krishna, Shiva, Buddha. I saw all the saints of India pass by, one after the other. This diversity of divine forms signified for me the oneness of God. And then, then I saw light. Only light remained. I had waited for this because God has always been "Light" for me.
While this procession was taking place before my enraptured eyes, I pinched myself several times to see if I was dreaming or if I was hypnotised. The images lasted for about half an hour; then they faded and again I saw Babaji's smiling face. Overcome, I surrendered to Him, inwardly accepting Him as my Master.
*********
When I finished my studies, I became interested in Indian philosophy and yoga. I met some people who had been in India with the Tibetan Lama, and my awakened desire for truth and wisdom led me there too. It wasn't a specific spiritual path or even a particular guru that I was seeking, but rather "truth", the truth as an inner experience. I journeyed with some friends to the Himalayan mountains and in particular to the small town of Almora, where we decided to stay on. One day, I consulted the I-Ching about a guru. Puzzling yet unambiguous was the answer: "The time has come for you to meet your spiritual Master".
The very next day, in the house of an elderly American lady who had lived in Almora for twenty years, I met Babaji. She told me that. Babaji was looking for a devotee who had been with Him in a previous lifetime. She was directed to invite to her home all the foreigners staying in Almora. When I heard this, I couldn't help feeling I was the one concerned.
And so it was - my intuition had not led me astray. I knew little of Babaji before our encounter. Some people told me that despite his youthful appearance, He was, in fact, very old. He had been able to maintain His youthful form for thousands of years. Standing before Him at last, I was especially impressed by His simplicity and cheerfulness. He appeared unusually serene, deeply centred, and sat for hours like a statue in meditation. In His eyes I saw He was a wise man. For a long time I just watched Him. Then, in thought, I put before Him questions which had long troubled me. I asked to be given of His wisdom to help me find the truth inside me.
As I got up to leave, I heard His voice internally saying: "We shall meet again".
That same night I dreamt of Him. In the company of some disciples, He came out of a dark forest. He was holding a long stick. His form transformed into Light and spoke to me: "I am your Master".
"What will you teach me?", I asked.
"I will show you how to wash up"
How well Babaji knew me! Back home, washing dishes had always been a horror for me. His answer basically meant He would teach me humility and simplicity. And truly, as soon as I set foot in Babaji's ashram, my job for the next two years was washing up and cleaning.
*********
"When there is an auspicious constellation of the stars in a person's life, then only can he/she come to a sacred place and meet saintly people. When a person's life has reached a turning point and the bad karmas are coming to an end, then that person is naturally drawn to a sacred place".
*********
It happened on my first day in Haidakhan. Only through enormous physical exertion had I managed to reach the place at all. Everything was strange and new. Impressions bombarded me relentlessly.
At some point, Babaji motioned some Europeans, myself among them, to accompany Him as He left the crowd and moved into a small room. He spoke for a while with the others, then turned to me saying: "Where have you been?"
I answered: "In the Aurobindo Ashram at Pondicherry".
"Did you like it there?", asked Babaji pointedly.
It was actually the first place in India that I had liked at all and so I answered truthfully: "Yes".
"Go where you like!", roared Babaji.
It was as if I had been struck by a thunderbolt. Thoughts began screaming through my mind: "Go? Go now? Impossible! It's too late now, and besides, I can hardly walk another step. But apparently I'm not allowed to stay either. Cannot go .... cannot stay ...."
"So what do you say to that?", Babaji continued.
Tears were running down my cheeks. A moment later Babaji was taking a mala from around His neck and placing it around mine. Then He lay His hand in blessing on the top of my head.
Only later did I begin to understand this statement. It wasn't about go where you like (want to), rather go where you will, that is, follow your inner truth. The thunder in His voice has the power to inwardly overcome all obstacles.
This statement was a summary of the teachings and is to be practised.
*********
A young man asked Babaji if he should go ahead and get married.
"Why do you want to marry?", enquired Babaji. "Because I'm so lonely".
To which Babaji replied: "How can you say that you're lonely when I am in your every breath?"
*********
Babaji had assigned me to crochet a hat for Him. When I offered Him the completed work, He took hold of a second hat, meticulously placed one inside the other and showed me precisely where I should crochet them together. Then He looked at me with intensity and said: "Make one from two. Do you understand?"
Some time later I understood it to mean this: unite the human will with Divine Will
