but one biscuit a day.
May 1. As I walked along the sea shore I found a barrel of gunpowder, and several pieces of the wreck, the sea had flung up. Having secured those, I made to the ship, whose stern was torn off, and washed a great distance ashore; but the rest lay in the sands. This I suppose was occasioned by the earthquake. I now resolved to keep my old place of abode; and also to go to the ship that day, but then found it impossible.
May 3. This day I went on board, and with my saw sawed off one of the beams, which kept her quarter-deck. I then cleared the sand till flood.
May 4. I caught some fish, but they were not wholesome, The same day I also catched a young dolphin.
May 5. 'This day I also repaired to the wreck, and sawed another piece of timber, and when the flood came, I made a float of three great planks, which were driven ashore by the tide.
May 6, 7, 8, 9. These days I brought off the iron bolts, opened the deck with the iron crow, and carried two planks to land, having made a way into the very middle of the wreck.
May 10, 11, 12, 13, 14. All this time I spent in bringing off great quantities of iron and timber.
May 15. Took with me two hatchets on purpose to cut off some lead from the roll, but all in vain, for it lay too low under water.
May 16. I omitted going to the wreck this day, for employing myself in looking for pigeons, I outstaid my time.
May 17. I perceived several pieces of the wreck driven ashore, which I found belonged to the head of the ship.
May 24. To this day I worked on the wreck, and with great difficulty loosened some things so much with the crow, that at the first flowing tide several casks floated out, and many of the seamen's chests, yet that day nothing came to land but pieces of timber, and a hogshead which had some Brazil pork in it. I continued working to the 15th of June; (except necessary times for food and rest) and had I known how to have built a boat, I had timber and planks enough; I had also near 100 weight of sheet lead.
June 16. As I was wandering towards the sea-side, I found a large tortoise or turtle, being the first I had seen on the island, though, as I afterwards found, there were many on the other side of it.
June 17. This day I spent in cooking it, found in her threescore eggs, and her flesh the most savoury and pleasant I ever tasted in my life.
June 18. I staid within this day, there being a continual rain; and it was somewhat more chilly and cold than usual.
June 19. Exceedingly bad, being taken with a trembling and shivering.
June 20. Awake all night, my head racked with pain and feverish.
June 21. Sick unto death, and terrified with the dismal apprehensions of my condition. Prayed to God more frequently, but very confusedly.
June 22. Something better, but still uneasy in my mind.
June 23. Again relapsed much as before.
June 24. Mended a second time.
June 25. A violent ague for seven hours, cold and hot fits succeeded with faint sweats.
June 26. Better, but very weak, yet I scrambled out, shot a she-goat, brought it home and broiled some of it; I would willingly have stewed it, and made some broth, but had no pod.
June 27 All this day I was afflicted with an ague; thirsty, yet I could not help myself to water: Prayed to God in these words: Lord, in pity look upon me: Lord, have mercy upon me: have mercy upon me! After this I fell asleep, which I found had much refreshed me when I awaked. I fell fast asleep a second time, and fell into this strange and terrible sort of dream.
Methought I was sitting on the same spot of ground at the outside of the wall where I sat when the storm blew after the earthquake; and that I saw a man descending from a great black cloud, and alight upon the ground. He was all over as bright as a flash of fire that a little before surrounded him; his countenance inconceivably terrible; the earth as it were trembled when he stept upon the ground, and flashes of fire seemed to fill all the air. No sooner I thought him landed upon the earth, but with a long spear, or other weapon, he made towards me; but first ascending a rising ground, his voice added to my amazement, when I thought I heard him pronounce these dreadful words, Unhappy wretch! seeing all these things have not brought thee to repentance, thou shalt immediately die. In pronouncing this dreadful sentence, I thought he went to kill me with the spear that was in his hand.
Any body may think it impossible for me to express the horrors of my mind at this vision: and even when I awaked, this very dream made a deep impression upon my mind. The little divine knowledge I had, I received from my father's instructions, and that was worn out by an uninterrupted series of sea-faring impiety for eight years space. Except what sickness forced from me, I do not remember I had one thought of lifting up my heart towards God, but rather had a certain stupidity of soul, not having the least sense or fear of the Omnipotent Being when in distress, nor of gratitude to him for his deliverances. Nay, when I was on the desperate expedition on the desert African shore, I cannot remember I had one thought of what would become of me, or to beg his consolation and assistance in my sufferings and distress. When the Portugal captain took me up and honorably used me, nay, farther, when I was even delivered from drowning by escaping to this island, I never looked upon it as a judgment, but only said I was an unfortunate dog, and that's all. Indeed some secret transports of soul I had, which was not through grace but only a common flight of joy, that I was yet alive, when my companions were all drowned, and no other joy could I conceive but what is common with the sailors over a bowl of punch, after they have escaped the greatest dangers.
The likelihood of wanting for neither food nor conveniences, might have called upon me for a thankful acknowledgment to Providence. Indeed, the growth of my corn touched with some sense, but that soon wore off again. The terrible earthquake pointed to me, as it were, the finger of God, but my dreadful amazement continued no longer than its duration. But now, when my spirits began to sink under the burden of a strong distemper, and I could leisurely view the miseries of death present themselves before my eyes, then my awakened conscience began to reproach me with my past life, in which I had so wickedly provoked the justice of God to pour down his vengeance upon me.
Such reflections as these oppressed me even in the violence of distemper. Some prayers I uttered, which only proceeded from the fear of death. But when I considered my father's advice and prophecy, I could not forbear weeping; for he told me, That if I did persist in my folly, I should not only be deprived of God's blessing, but have time enough to reflect upon my despising his instructions, and this, in a wretched time, when none could help me. And now concluding it to be fulfilled, having no soul in the island to administer any comfort to me, I prayed earnestly to the Lord, that he would help me in this great calamity. And this, I think, was the first time I prayed in sincerity for many years. But now I must return to my journal.
June 28. Something refreshed with sleep, and the fit quite off, I got up. My dream still occasioned in me a great consternation; and, fearing that the ague might return the succeeding day, I concluded it time to get something to comfort me. I filled a case bottle with water, and set it within reach of my bed; and, to make it more nourishing and less chilly, I put some rum in it. The next thing I did was to broil me a piece of goat's flesh, of which I ate but little. I was very weak; however, walked about, dreading the return of my distemper; and at night I supped on three of the turtle's eggs, which I roasted and ate, begging God's blessing therewith.
After I had eaten, I attempted to walk again out of doors with my gun; but was so weak, that I sat down,
