when we succeed in doing so, we are well on the way to being relaxed. This is a very good defense mechanism to use if you feel stress is still affecting you. If you feel a situation is causing stress to build up, concentrate upon relaxing your trigger areas. You will find that if you keep your body relaxed, the whole situation will be defused.
Relaxation in Daily Life
Once you have experienced the “feel” of relaxation in your formal exercises, you will be able to recapture it at will during the day. Soon it will become your natural state. Free from tension, you will be able to react appropriately and will not be affected by stress.
Ideally, we aim to be relaxed all day and impervious to potentially stressful situations. Practicing these techniques goes a long way toward this end and we can do still more to achieve it. At every opportunity through the day, at every idle moment, take the time to check your level of relaxation. Do an internal inventory. Start with the trigger areas and make sure they are relaxed.
When you begin doing this, you may find that every time you think of your trigger areas, they need help to be more fully relaxed. That is fine. It is good to simply notice such a fact; and then to realize you can do something about it! That is why we practice. That is why we persist with these exercises. Relax. Smile. Know that the worse the tension to begin with, the more benefit you will get in the long run by relaxing!
Seek to experience the feeling of relaxation at every opportunity. After a while you will stay relaxed and you will feel a wonderful difference.
Relaxing Moments
Use your time wisely. When in the car, do not just waste those precious seconds at the red lights. Relax as much as you can and feel how good it is. Maybe take a deeper breath in; breathe out, and let go. The muscles softening and loosening. The feeling of relaxation all through.
And then remember the cat. Relaxed but alert. As we watch a cat in slow motion, the foreleg flows gracefully forward. All the muscles at the front of the leg are contracting to draw the leg forward. The muscles at the back of the leg are relaxed. There is nothing to hinder the flow of the leg or stilt the action. Look at a tense person walking—they jerk along in a most ungainly way. The relaxed cat flows. When the leg moves backward, the muscles at the back of the leg contract, and those at the front relax.
So even while driving along, be aware that your trigger areas are relaxed. Ideally, your whole body is inherently relaxed. And at the same time, you are quite alert, focused and mindful, ideally poised in body and mind for the driving.
The key to this is the principle that you use only the muscles you need for any given task of the day. To avoid stress, to maintain a relaxed state, muscles are either working at a specific function or at rest. They do not need to hold any residual tension.
I have seen many people take on a new elegance and charm merely by learning to relax properly. Perhaps this was most marked in Edna, an elderly patient. As she learned to relax, the worry and tension left her face. Coupled with the benefits of the diet, a new vitality and vigor came over her, producing a genuine, radiant glow that was obvious to all.
Very soon, using these techniques, your body will be relaxed, your mind also, and the benefits of the meditation will have entered your daily life. You will be reacting appropriately and you will be heading toward profound healing and long-term good health.
Putting it All together • The Main Meditation Practice: Mindfulness-Based Stillness Meditation
This completes all the background and preliminaries we need to be aware of and to have practiced so that we are ready for the main meditation practice of mindfulness-based stillness meditation (MBSM).
Remember the simple summary: having prepared well, we relax. Relaxing more deeply, we become more mindful. As our mindfulness develops, the stillness naturally reveals itself. We rest in open, undistracted awareness.
Here is the “script” we can learn to lead us through mindfulness-based stillness meditation:
The Mindfulness-Based Stillness Meditation—Main Practice
Take a few moments to adjust your body . . . and then, when you are ready . . . relax into your posture . . .
Now, let us begin by letting go of what we have been doing recently . . . and bringing our attention more particularly to this present moment . . .
To do this, it may help to bring the focus of our attention to the breath for a few moments . . . to simply be aware that as we are breathing in, we are breathing in . . . and as we are breathing out, we are breathing out . . .
And as you do bring your attention more particularly to the breath . . . you will probably notice that as you do breathe out, there is a natural feeling of relaxing a little with the outbreath . . . of letting go a little . . .
Breathing out . . . and letting go . . . relaxing . . . releasing . . . letting go . . .
Feeling it deeply . . . completely . . . and feeling it all through the body . . . and the mind . . . it is a good feeling . . . a natural feeling . . . just going with it . . . calm and relaxed . . . calm and relaxed . . . going with it . . . quite effortlessly . . . effortlessly . . . letting go . . .
And just allowing your breath to take up whatever rhythm feels comfortable for you at the moment . . . breathing out . . . relaxing . . . releasing . . . letting go . . . breathing out, and the breath becoming longer . . . finer . . . subtler . . . then a pause . . . and simply allowing the breath to come back in of its own accord . . . quite effortlessly . . . effortlessly . . . going with it . . . relaxing . . . releasing . . . and feeling the ease of it all . . . the ease of it all . . .
And now, it might help to take your attention to that point between the eyes, a little into the forehead . . . and notice there what is like a still, quiet center . . . a point of stillness . . . and relax your eyes . . . and soften your gaze . . . and hold your attention lightly, on that point of stillness . . .
And if you do notice any sounds coming to your awareness . . . just let them come when they are ready . . . and go when they are ready . . . a bit like white clouds, drifting across a blue sky . . . they just come when they are ready . . . go when they are ready . . .
Holding your attention lightly on the stillness . . . and simply letting go . . . letting go . . .
And if any sensations in your body do come to your awareness . . . just the same . . . just simply notice them . . . free of any judgment . . . free of any reaction, or commentary . . . and feel the letting go . . . your body relaxing . . . and releasing . . . holding your attention lightly on the stillness . . . and simply noticing whatever may come to your attention . . . simply being aware . . . a gentle focus on the stillness . . . and letting things come when they are ready . . . go when they are ready . . . letting go . . . letting go . . .
And if you do notice any thoughts coming to your attention . . . just the same . . . just let them come when they are ready . . . go when they are ready . . . gently holding your attention on the stillness . . . and feeling the ease of it all . . . the ease of it all . . . just simply letting go . . . letting go . . .
And then it is almost as if you can merge into that stillness . . . relaxing . . . releasing . . . simply resting in the stillness . . . aware . . . free of any judgment . . . free of any commentary . . . and feeling the ease of it all . . . the ease of it all . . . just simply letting go . . . and resting in the stillness . . . quite effortlessly . . . effortlessly
