with a mouthful of food. He looked at his wife and asked:
– Zhinka, go check it out.
Fifovna came up and lifted the old woman by the collar. The feet came off the floor, and the knees did not straighten. She went up and set the corpse as a vase in front of a mug, stupidly looking with her mouth full of chewed eggs, her husband.
– See for yourself, schmuck, is she dead or not?! – and was about to leave. – He, Zhinka. You will answer for the Zhinka. she muttered…
– Take her off the table, you fool!!! Are you… really, or what? I am the boss here, and the boss, and you?…
– Well, it started again. – mumbled the tray Intsephalopath.
– And you use the Ottila Aligadzhievich Klop fund for free! – the crumbs from the mouth flew apart, – And in general… pah, shit, – he spat out all the contents from his mouth and yelled, before climbing onto the table. “You are a maid here.” Got it?
– Yes my Lord. – Donald Isoldushka and knelt. Her head was flush with the head of her husband standing on the table. And the size of their heads would simply impress any pessimist: Her head was five times larger than him.
– Okay, heh heh heh, forgive me, take this grandmother out the door to the porch. No, better away from the hut. It’s morning and someone will find her.
The wife took the corpse and carried it where the owner ordered. After all, she also worked in support, as a technical technician, a janitor and assistant secretary with the rank of senior mattress. A minute later she returned and walked, marching to the table.
– I threw her over the fence.
– Are you a fool or something? This is a veteran of the plant. True, sitting. In short – the bum.
– You are eating. – the wife moved up the plate.
– I do not want. You should have put it on my plate. What kind of food is it? Take it out, let the children eat up. Just don’t tell them what I ate. And then they disdain.
– That’s right, if you have a whore from your mouth. Do you need to brush your teeth when you last cleaned them, a hundred years ago? – the wife collected the dishes from the table and went to the residential half of the hut.
– Be quiet, woman! What do you understand in smells? Okay, – I threw off my sleeve with crumbs and drops from the table. – What I wanted to say. Huh?.. So, get ready to go to Peter.
– What for?
– Oh, colleague, we have a new serious business. First and last!
– Are we being transferred to St. Petersburg? – Harutun pulled his hair out of his nostrils, was delighted and pounded with a cane.
– No, take it cooler. We will investigate a serious matter, and not poke around the sheds, in search of lost chickens and bull. And then, when we find him, we will be transferred higher…
– Where is it to heaven?
– Fool, there are no cities in the sky, To America.
– And what will we look for? What needs to be found to send us to America?
– We will look for the nose…
– Whose nose? – Harutun did not understand.
Ottila climbed onto the table and walked to the other side, closer to the Corporal. He sat down and dangled his legs, chatted with them.
– Well, in a nutshell.. – he began in a half voice.
– And what, in a whisper then?
– Nerd, competition. This case can be taken away by the Feds.
– Ahhh! I realized the cartridge.
– So then, the sleeve. Heh, cool! I am a “cartridge”, and you are a “sleeve”. And the cartridge is put into the sleeve. Hahaha Is funny
– No. They put a bullet into the cartridge.
– What, smart? And you know that in our country everyone is smart – poor and poor. Do you want to make a difference? Then listen, I won’t explain twice. A holy place is never empty. And your place, not just the Holy.. Do you know how many unemployed people in our village want to fuck you to take your free place?
Harutun hatched his eyes out of fear and shed tears of senility.
– Sorry, cartridge, not a bullet is inserted into the sleeve, but a cartridge.
– Well, then hear, how much, I will explain in a nutshell: Eeee… did you read Gogol?
– He drank a mogul.
– Are you kidding me?
– It was humor. I watched films with his participation.
– That’s good. Did you watch a movie about NOS?
– About whose nose?
– Well, not about yours? … – Ottila jumped off the table, – Humor again?
– Mnn, yes! – the old man stood up at attention. Ottila looked at the corporal’s groin and, with bulging eyes, raised his head, throwing his head to the end and saw only a sleepy plexus.
– Sit fucking!! he yelled. The corporal sat in a starting position.
– I remembered. The cartridge… this is where the man lost his nose…
– Remembered?
– Yes sir!!
– So we will look for him. Himself … – And Ottila poked a finger at the ceiling. – asked me for half a day. He very much requested that I myself personally take up this matter. So to speak, took personal control.
– The God?
– No, you fool, Marshal. Nuuu, our god. He said that there is no one worthier … – Ottila jumped to her knees, standing subordinate and took control of the situation.
– And how will we look for him. This is a story?! Moreover, they died.
– Who are they?
– Well, these, the main characters died long ago… and Gogol is the main witness, the same… well, dead.?! This is not humor.. Ahhh?
– Fool. – The bug jumped from the lap of Incephalopath. – We will look for a monument on a copper board that was stolen. Either homeless people or crooks. All the same, a monument to NOSU, and maybe… antiques.!?
– And who will stay here?
– Isolde and Izzy for the main.
– Is he still small?
– Not
