Yet, though my parents did relatively well for themselves, one characteristic they were unable to easily overcome was their mind-set regarding money, and this mind-set affected me as well. They inherited generations of cultural beliefs and values regarding money, which primarily focused on fear, doubt, and lack. They were both very young children during World War II, when they endured hardships and were forced to go without many of life’s comforts.
I recall early on making a conscious choice to move beyond this outlook. Even at that young age, I knew there was so much more that I was meant to do, be, and have. I simply knew that I was not on this earth to play small, since I had a bigger purpose — although I could not have imagined what it was at that time. By the time I was fifteen I was ready to adopt a different view of money, one that was more positive and productive. I had a part-time job, which gave me some independence and some experience with managing money. But it wasn’t till years later that I fully realized that I had the power to release my family’s legacy regarding money, adopt a new mind-set, and create different results in my life.
Blessings in Disguise
While I was at university, like many young people, I went through a rebellious phase, which again changed the course of my life path. My studies were interrupted by big life events, and by the age of twenty-three I had undergone what it takes many women years or even decades to experience. I was married briefly, became a mother, got divorced, and was living on my own with my precious baby daughter. It all happened in a flash.
I had very quickly realized that I was living the wrong life with the wrong partner. During that time, I gave my financial power away while staying home to take care of my baby. I had to rely on my partner for money, which did not sit well with me. Within six months, I decided to leave the relationship, knowing that my and my daughter’s future would have been bleak had I stayed. Although my parents were generous in offering us a place in their home, I wanted to be on my own and craved freedom and independence.
Living on my own with a small baby in a large city was not easy. In fact, it was scary at times. I had a sheltered upbringing and did not know how to be on my own. I didn’t even know how to cook, so I had to learn fast. At this point I decided not to apply for social assistance. It was available to me, but I was determined to make it on my own. I also decided not to pursue child support. While not ideal, at the time I was only too happy to forgo these things so that I could quickly move on and secure my independence.
Getting a well-paying job was at the top of my list. Fortunately, I got a job in a research hospital after just a few weeks of looking. My daughter and I lived in an old but cozy one-bedroom low-rise apartment in an upscale neighborhood with a large park and a beautiful church across the street, which eased my mind.
The only help I accepted was with childcare. I was able to secure a spot for my daughter at a coveted daycare center because, during the government elections, I decided to leverage the campaigns and badgered the mayor’s office to take my daughter off the waiting list so that I could keep my job. She was close to last on the list, which meant months of waiting for an opening. Miraculously, the next day she had her spot. That was a defining moment for me as I realized I could manifest my desires by asking for what I wanted. More specifically, I realized that I was a powerful manifester and could achieve anything that I set my mind on. My “aha” moment was that when you are completely aligned with your intention and take action on that alignment, the Universe joins and supports you.
Those were memorable years for me. My entry-level salary was decent, but I was also left with high credit card debt and a student loan. I decided to take full responsibility for my finances, which led me to close my credit card accounts and pay for everything in cash. This meant that if I didn’t have the money, I couldn’t purchase something. It took me four years to pay off the credit cards and student loan in full; I had such a sense of accomplishment when I completed the payments. It was a good plan because I paid every bill on time, thereby maintaining a good credit rating — no credit card company or collection agency ever called me to demand money owed.
While I did not have much in the way of material possessions or savings, with just enough for rent, food, transportation, and incidentals after the bills, I was happy, optimistic, and hopeful for a much brighter future. An essential lesson I learned about money during this time was the importance of not denying myself some extras from time to time, particularly on special occasions such as birthdays, so that I would not feel like I was in a cycle of lack. This made a big difference in my outlook.
Mind-set is everything because if I had had a different perspective, things could have gone in a much different direction. In those years I never once thought of myself as poor. It did not even enter my thoughts — not because I worked at keeping those ideas away but simply because I never identified with them. This is a key outlook.
My perspective on my relationship with money during that phase was that everything I needed would be provided for, and somehow it always was. It was at this time that I began to make the connection between money and spiritual laws, which we will discuss in full later in the book.
A blessing and a silver lining was meeting my husband. Everything fell into place quickly, just as I had envisioned, including his deep bond with my daughter. Soon thereafter we got married and bought our first house. This gave me the opportunity to go back to school and on to graduate school, where I majored in social policy and management.
A Life of Service and Contribution
The idea of making a contribution, being of service, and making a difference has always mattered to me. It led me to follow in my father’s footsteps and focus on the public service arena. My work contributed to many initiatives, including Canada’s first-ever legislation for people with disabilities; creating equal-opportunity policies for disadvantaged groups; and helping women achieve financial independence. Over the years, I assumed progressive senior leadership roles with a broader span of influence and large teams, and I was managing and spending eight-figure budgets. My executive career in the public sector was very rewarding.
My relationship with money became harmonious. There was a consistent flow of abundance and blessings, which enabled our family to live comfortably. My daughter was happy and thriving, which is, of course, the greatest blessing for a parent. We enjoyed vacations abroad, a large home, and beautiful things and surroundings. By this time my humble beginnings seemed like they belonged to a distant past.
It seemed like a charmed life. The only issue was that I persistently felt like I was meant to do something more, to be more, and to realize a much broader mission. Although I had all the trappings of success, something was missing. My body was signaling me to get connected with what I needed in order to feel joyful, but I was too busy to pay attention. My days felt like I was in a scene from The West Wing television show, with endless crises to solve and meetings to chair. I felt driven to get results, often eating lunch late in the day or not at all, and working late into the night. While making a contribution through public service was a big motivator for me, it began to take its toll.
Life always has a way of making you pay attention, usually in a dramatic way. I experienced a turning point with my health in the form of burnout, induced by stress, which impacted my low-functioning immune system. There were days where I could not get out of bed, despite my best efforts. Simply put, I was depleted physically and emotionally. My quality of life was declining, and I knew that something had to change. This experience was the jolt I needed to reassess what I truly wanted.
This reassessment ultimately led me to walk away from a successful fifteen-year, six-figure career to follow a deeper calling. I had just received my postgraduate designation as a professional certified coach, so I knew the timing was perfect for a new adventure. I quickly decided to hand in my resignation, which shocked many people because I was at the height of my career. But I wanted to start a new and meaningful chapter and
