that great man of yours that I, the monk, have said the following. From start to finish, the matter of his drawing a salary depends upon the fact that, at the beginning, the three imperial boards arranged to have such an official. They expected that he would harmonize the yin and the yang, settle matters in the way that they ought to be settled, and be himself deserving of his own share of happiness. He has no reason to pull down the property of Buddha. You return and tell him that I, the old man, say that it is not permitted.”
Hearing these words of Ji Gong, how could these several honorable managers not be enraged by them and not become more reckless?
Qin An said, “All right! You ignorant monk! First of all I will beat you!” With his arms flailing, he came at Ji Gong and attempted to land a blow.
Ji Gong stepped to one side, saying, “If you want to fight, let us go outside.”
Qin An straightened up and walked outside after the monk. There, Qin An told his people, “Beat this monk for me!”
The low-ranking officials all came at him together, fists swinging, each trying to get in a blow at the monk’s face or legs. There were sounds of unceasing groans, in the midst of which they heard a voice say, “Do not strike! It is I!”
The low officials cried out, “Of course it is you that we are beating. You had no business to come running in among us, asking to get yourself killed. You really are too old to be putting dirt on your own head!”
While they were still beating him, they heard Qin Sheng, who had come out and was standing there beside them, say: “Stop beating him. I heard a sound that was not right. Let me look, before you beat him any more.”
Oh, it was dreadful! Suddenly Qin Sheng and the others realized that the monk was standing off to the east observing them. Naturally, he was laughing. Looking down, they saw the chief manager, Qin An, disheveled and bruised. The people gathered round him and said, “Manager, how did you happen to get beaten, sir?”
Qin An said, “You were all getting even with me for some private grudges you had. I told you to beat the monk, but you beat me. I said, ‘It is I!’ and you all said that it was I that you were beating. All right, all right, all right!”
The other two, Qin Zhi and Qin Ming, came out to look. They saw that Qin An’s injuries seemed rather serious, and Qin Sheng said, “This certainly is the result of some witchcraft of that monk. Every one of you beat him for me.”
When the low officials heard this, they all went toward the monk, their eyes glaring and their expressions most forbidding.
The monk said, “How nice! How nice! A quiet man may ride, but a quiet horse is ridden.” Then he said under his breath the six sacred words: “Om Ma Ni Pad Me Hum! I command!”
His words were frightening enough to make them all fall silent. Then they all became angry with each other. Chang Sheng looked at Li Lu and said, “Every time I look at you, my fury rises. I have long wanted to beat you, you subservient dog’s head.”
Li Lu said, “Good! Let us face off and see who stays up and who goes down!”
Over on the other side of the courtyard things were much the same. Jia and Yi were battling in one place; elsewhere, Tzu and Zhou were fighting to the death; eighteen people were beating each other in nine pairs.
Qin Sheng looked at the battered and bruised Qin An and said, “I am always angry when I look at you. You asked the people to beat you up. If you are angry at me, come over and I will give you a good one.” At once the two struck out at each other.
Ji Gong was standing watching one man and asked him, “Why are you hitting that man?”
The man looked and said, “Something is wrong. I am not the right adversary for him.”
Ji Gong said, “Let me help you with a suggestion. Hit him a few more times, then exchange him for someone else.”
The monk watched them go on fighting. One hit the other a slanting blow and then almost bit off his ear. The other, enraged, then bit off a piece of the first one’s nose. They were all fighting wildly with each other.
The superintendent of the monks came over, looked and said, “Dao Ji, you have created a great disturbance. You have put these honorable managers of Prime Minister Qin through more than beasts could bear. Is this right? Are you not ready to release them from your spell?”
Ji Gong replied, “Brother Teacher, if you had not asked me, I might have let this band of robbers kill each other, one by one. Today I will spare them.” Then he said, “Stop fighting, everyone!”
Naturally at this command they all came to their senses, each one blaming the other. One said, “Sheng, my brother in arms! You and I have had such a long friendship! Why did you beat me so cruelly?”
His friend Sheng replied, “How should I know? Look at my ear—you bit off a piece!”
The other retorted, “Don’t talk about it! Wasn’t that a piece of my nose that you just spat out?”
All of the others had recovered their wits, including Qin An, who seemed in no serious danger after all. “Which temple does that crazy monk come from?” Qin An asked the superintendent. “You had better not let him get away. In a little while, if that crazy monk is not available, I will ask you for someone in his place!”
The managers and their men mounted their horses and then left the Monastery of the Soul’s Retreat. All along the road they whipped their steeds. The shaken men were unwilling to slow down until they had passed through the Qiantang gate and reached the prime minister’s estate. There they dismounted. Then they saw coming out of the mansion gate a fellow worker who looked at them and asked, “How did you come to return like this?”
Qin An told the whole story from beginning to end. Then the man advised him: “When you see the prime minister, do not tell him the exact details of what has happened; instead, let him take responsibility for finding this monk who brought you ill luck and seems to be the ring-leader of the temple.”
When Qin An came to the library, Prime Minister Qin was there reading. As soon as he lifted his head, he said, “You four men were sent to the Monastery of the Soul’s Retreat to borrow some timbers. Why did you come back looking like this?”
Qin An replied, “We were just carrying out your orders, sir, and had reached the Monastery of the Soul’s Retreat beyond the West Lake to borrow the timbers. All the monks in the temple were glad to lend the lumber, except one crazy monk. He not only would not lend it to us, but he beat and insulted us. I beg the prime minister to make a ruling concerning this matter.”
When Prime Minister Qin heard Qin An’s explanation, he said, “So! In addition to everything else, the Monastery of the Soul’s Retreat has produced a crazy monk. How does he dare to beat the people of my household? It really is a pity!”
He then used his brush to write a warrant that was sent to the capital’s garrison, ordering that five hundred soldiers under the command of two senior officers be provided to maintain order in the area. These officers were to surround the Monastery of the Soul’s Retreat and to bring back Ji Gong in irons.
CHAPTER 9
Soldiers surround the Monastery of the Soul’s Retreat and bring back the mad monk in fetters; Ji Gong’s games with the village
