did not attempt to hide the fact that she was separated and had a young son named Jason. She told me she had been guilted into getting married at a young age because of her pregnancy and said she never would have married if it were not for all the pressure put upon her.
I was mesmerized by every word Vicki spoke that evening. I have often heard that “time flies when you are having fun” but during this night, I had one of the best times of my life and yet, it did not “fly” as time seemed irrelevant.
Vicki had been drinking a mixed drink and I had been drinking a mixed drink of my own but it was not what it appeared. Vicki caught me putting 7-Up in a glass with a little Coke. I told her it was my fake Seven and Seven. She was very curious about this and asked why.
I told Vicki that during my high school years, I attended several parties where everyone drank, everyone but me. I learned early on if you wanted to be part of the group, you had to drink like the group.
To keep people off of my back, I told them I was drinking Seven and Seven and when they looked at my drink, it did resemble a Seven and Seven. I always felt I had more fun watching people get silly without getting silly myself.
My sister Tina and my cousin Cindy accompanied me to the party. Tina was not feeling well and requested I take her back to our grandparent’s (Jermaine and Gertrude Todd) house where we were staying. Vicki came along for the ride and asked that I stop by her new apartment to check on her dog before we returned to the party. I gave Tina a bag to hold onto just in case she got sick.
On our way to our grandparent’s house, Tina did get sick but kept it contained inside the bag. As she was getting out of my newer car, she said, “Aren’t you proud of me Tom, I did not get sick on your Camaro”. Just as she got out, she dropped her bag, which spilled on the passenger door and part of the dash of my Camaro! Tina felt terrible but was in no condition to help clean up. Vicki was gracious enough to help with this detail as I got Tina into the house.
As the party ended, everyone went on their way. I said my goodbyes to Vicki and told her I hoped to see her again very soon. On the way back to my grandparent’s house, I could not stop thinking about Vicki.
After I returned to my grandparent’s house, I had trouble sleeping. I remember just lying in bed thinking about this amazing woman I had met. I also remembered that prior to leaving for the party I told my mother (Barbara) I would be meeting the woman of my dreams that night. I was just joking when I told her this but now I wondered if it was a premonition I would be meeting Vicki.
Vicki and Jason right before we met
Chapter one
1984, Our First Year Together
On January 1st, I returned to Vicki’s apartment and asked her out on a date. She accepted and we went on our first date together the next day. I remember driving her down restaurant row looking for one of the finer places to eat. When I gave her the choice of any restaurant she wanted, she told me she just wanted a hamburger and chose Carrow’s. I was hoping for something a little more romantic than Carrow’s but if that is what Vicki wanted, that is what she will have.
We were at the restaurant for a few hours, just talking. I planned to take Vicki to the movies but time just got away from us. When I dropped her off after our date, I asked her when we could go out again. Vicki asked me what I was doing the next day. I told her tomorrow it was and on January 3rd, we went out on our second date.
Vicki and I again went out and had a wonderful time. I was sad because my time off from work came to an end and I had to be back to work the next day. I told Vicki I would not be able to return for a few weeks but wanted to know if we could continue dating. Vicki told me she liked that idea and we made another date for when I returned.
For our third date on January 25th, I took Vicki for a tram ride high on the mountain above Palm Springs, CA. While there, we took a mule ride and went on a long walk. It was then that I decided to confess my love for Vicki.
I began by saying, “How do I tell a married woman I think I am in love with her”. Vicki looked at me and quietly said, “You think”. I then rephrased by saying, “I know”. She then quickly said, “You just tell her!” at which time I said to Vicki, “I love you” for the first time.
Our first photo together as a couple
Vicki told me immediately after she got married; she became a frequent victim of abuse by her new husband during his drug-induced tirades. She told me that she was eight months pregnant when she married and after Jason was just two months old, she left the brutality and never looked back. She shared with me that the only reason she was still married, was because she could not afford to file for the divorce.
Although she had been separated for over a year and planning to get a divorce, she was married nonetheless. Before meeting Vicki, I could never have imagined myself telling a married woman I was in love with her; let alone date her. However, with Vicki everything was different. I knew the night I met her I would someday marry her and I wanted her to know I was serious, as I did not want her to get away.
Vicki later told me she did not know how serious I was about her until the day I confessed my love for her. She told me it was at that moment she realized she loved me too. She confessed that being separated might complicate matters and she tried to find ways to pay for the divorce to clear the way for our future together.
It had been suggested to Vicki and I that Ben was a sort of match maker for us. As romantic as this may sound, it is not entirely true. Although we did meet at his party, Ben had originally intended for Vicki to meet one of his other friends, as he thought they would make a good couple.
During the New Year’s Eve Party, Ben told me I needed to back away from Vicki because she was supposed to be getting to know his other friend. I told him “Not”, gave him a new drink and sent him on his way. I knew Vicki was “the one” and I was not about to step aside for any other!
Vicki was just 18 and I was 22 when we met. I turned 23 a month later and Vicki would turn 19 the following month. We had been dating for about a month and a half when her mother asked me why an older guy (me) was interested in her daughter. She asked me if I realized Vicki had a child. I remember telling her I did not consider myself an “older guy” and I loved her daughter.
I assured Vicki’s mother that my intentions were honorable and I was fully aware Jason was part of the package. She said no more about it but I began to question myself, was a four-year difference in age too much? I did not think long and decided that this age difference was not an issue. All I needed to know was that I was in love with Vicki.
Tom and Vicki in one of our first photos together
In early March while Vicki and I were shopping, I was carrying Jason around the store. Then all of the sudden, out of the mouth of a 15-month old, Jason said to me, “Are you my daddy”? I cannot tell you how proud this made me feel as I looked at the surprised expression on Vicki’s face and seeing the serious look on Jason’s face.
