hair suggested she was an expert at making herself pretty and never went anywhere without doing just that. I’d put her in her mid-sixties, but even so, she was unusually attractive, and back in the day she must have been quite a dish. The way she was looking at me made me feel like a main course. Cheap, and a little dirty even. Then I remembered I was half naked.
“Oh, ah...I’m sorry, I was expecting someone else,” I said lamely.
“That’s quite all right, honey,” she said as she swept into the room. “You look just fine to me.” She cocked her head and smiled, holding up the plate she was carrying. “I brought you some hot buns.”
I clutched at my towel, because I had the distinct feeling if it fell off, I was the one who was going to get the shock of his life. This woman knew exactly what she was doing.
“You are Dino Martini, aren’t you?” She extended a bejeweled hand over the plate of cinnamon rolls and said, “I’m Della Vinson Owen. I’m your next-door neighbor. I came to welcome you to our little family.”
“That’s very nice of you, ma’am,” I said giving her hand a squeeze. “I’m sure I’ll enjoy them very much.”
She snatched the plate out of my reach and headed for the kitchen. “They’re my own personal recipe, I’m sure you’re going to just love them. Now, you have a seat and I’ll pour us some coffee, and we can get better acquainted.”
That fact that me getting dressed wasn’t included in her list of instructions didn’t escape my notice, and I began to get the feeling I could be in a bit of trouble. Not that I was especially worried about my virtue, but the last thing I needed was to piss off my neighbors right out of the gate.
“I was so happy when Adele told me we had a new tenant, and that he was a charming young man,” she was saying as she poked around in my cupboards for plates to serve the rolls on. “I share the apartment next door with Ruth Fletcher.”
“Adele said I was charming?” I raised an eyebrow.
She laughed. “Well, she didn’t use that word, exactly, but she didn’t use a lot of other words I’ve heard her call people, so I just read between the lines. And here you are, charming as anything.”
She set the table with silverware and napkins, and put the rolls in the middle, then went back for coffee. Since it appeared I was going to have a brunch date whether I liked it or not, I snuck into the bedroom for some pants.
When I came back out a few minutes later, dressed in light slacks and a green silk shirt, she clapped her hands together and said, “Oh my, don’t you look handsome. I do like a man who’s a snappy dresser.”
She took me by the arm and led me to the table, pulling out a chair for me to sit down in, and taking a seat opposite. She leaned forward, chin in hand, and said, “Now, tell me all about yourself.”
“Not all that much to tell, ma’am.” I tore off a hunk of my cinnamon roll and buttered it. “I grew up in New York, went to school there, then got sick of the cold weather, so I came down here. I like it, so I’ve stayed here ever since.”
“And what do you do for a living? I bet it’s very exciting.”
I knew that was a standard line and it didn’t matter what I said. She’d claim to be incredibly impressed even if I told her I sorted bolts, but I really hated to sound like I was playing into it. Besides, I hadn’t exactly been honest with Adele about my job. If she didn’t want floozies traipsing through her building, I didn’t think she’d be too keen on having a P.I. there, either.
“I’m kind of a personal consultant,” I said. “I help people sort out problems.”
“My goodness, that sounds very interesting,” she said, right on cue. “You must be a very clever man.” The coy smile she gave me was right out of the Southern belle handbook, and I had to admit she wasn’t at all bad to look at even if she was about twenty years out of my range.
I shrugged and took a sip of coffee. “I guess I have a knack for figuring things out. You learn to be pretty street smart when you grow up in a city like New York.”
“I’ll just bet.”
“What about you?” I asked. “This doesn’t seem like the sort of place one would find a classy belle such as yourself living. How did you end up here?”
“Oh, I used to live in a much fancier apartment when I was married, but you know how it is when you’re single and living off a limited income,” she said offhandedly. She deflected further questions by busying herself with fetching more coffee. “Besides, I like the ladies who live here. We’ve all gotten to be quite good friends over the years.”
In the kitchen, she happened to glance out the front window and squealed with delight. “What a wonderful car. Is that yours? I just love Mustangs, I think it’s such a masculine car.”
I chuckled. “Her name is Matilda.”
That brought peals of girlish laughter and she came back to sit down at the table. “What a quaint name for your car. I think I like that very much. You’ll have to take me for a ride with the top down sometime.”
The tone of her voice left me in no doubt about the thinly veiled innuendo, and I’m not sure, but I think I blushed. I must have, because she laughed out loud and said, “Oh honey, I am going to enjoy having you around here.”
“Say, since you’re here,” I said, “do you know what’s going to happen with the storefront downstairs? Does Adele have any plans for it?”
She looked curious. “None that I know of. We just use it for a little extra storage. Why? Are you interested in it?”
“I was thinking it might make a good office. My old one is getting torn down along with my apartment building.”
“That’s a shame. Well, having your office right here would be very handy, wouldn’t it?” She beamed, and I could tell she was already thinking she’d be able to drop by any time she liked. I’d have to set things up so she could only do that when I wanted her to, and not when it might compromise a client. Aside from that, I wouldn’t mind a dishy broad bringing me lunch once in a while.
“That’s what I was thinking,” I said. “I’m not in the office all the time, but having it close to home makes things easier.”
The beeping of my cellphone drifted in from the bedroom, and I excused myself to go answer it. I glanced at the screen as I picked it up and saw I had a message from one of the insurance agencies I do work for. That could wait.
When I went back out, Della had cleaned up the dishes from brunch and was drying off her plate. “Well, Dino, it’s been just lovely getting to chat with you, but I think I better go, now, and let you get to work. I wouldn’t want to keep you from your clients. I do hope we can do this again some time.”
I told her I’d like that, and I meant it too. I’ve got nothing against playing a little cat-and-mouse with a brassy chick who knows what she’s doing. Nine times out of ten, it’s just the flirting they’re after anyway.
* * * *
After Della left, I got my keys and wallet and went downstairs. I remembered the message, and while I
