into paid work, we’ve seen no real shift in the opposite direction. This, as Annabel Crabb has pointed out3, means that women frequently combine their careers with a second shift when they get home. As Crabb noted ‘We won’t fix the work problem until we fix the home problem.’ While successful women are frequently asked about how they juggle work and family, we need to start asking this of men too. It makes no sense to me that a lack of childcare is a drain on women’s careers and yet there is no evidence that it’s holding back men’s careers in any way. The sad fact is that if it was, it would likely have been fixed decades ago.
Reputable study after reputable study shows that there are sound economic reasons why gender inequality should be addressed. This won’t happen if we simply use our mentoring to help women fit better into organisations that were designed for men in traditional gender roles.
I hope I’ve been able to help my female and male mentees (and some of my mentors) challenge some of the tenacious gender stereotypes that limit both women and men. For me, it’s been particularly important that I don’t just help my mentees fit better into organisations and systems that perpetuate inequality—but that I help them become aware of these issues and change them. This is because, as author Catherine Fox said recently ‘… no amount of leaning in will break down the old boys club or narrow the gender pay gap.’4
We need to use mentoring to empower a redesign of organisational structures and cultures so that everyone will have an equal chance to contribute both at home and in the workplace. I’ve enjoyed reading about how so many of the mentoring relationships in this book were about (or involved elements of) doing just that!
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1 www.us.corwin.com/sites/default/files/upm-binaries/17419_Chapter_1.pdf
2 www.youtube.com/watch?v=fLUVWZvVZXw
3 The Wife Drought by Annabel Crabb, Ebury Press, 2014
4 The Australian, ‘Why it’s time to stop fixing women’ Catherine Fox
Norah Breekveldt
Norah is a leadership coach and consultant. She supports business leaders dedicated to advancing gender equity and diversity in their workplaces, and empowers women to lead with confidence and create successful careers.
Norah began her career in the public sector, then progressed into senior executive roles in the corporate world. As one of the few women on senior executive teams, she understands the dynamics of creating lasting change in complex, traditional organisations.
She is the recipient of the BCA/AFR Work and Family Award in 1993 for the introduction of work and family practices at Kemcor, and a Telstra Business Women’s Award in 1995.
Norah is the author of Sideways To The Top – 10 Stories of Successful Women That Will Change Your Thinking About Careers Forever (Melbourne Books, 2013) and Career Interrupted – How 14 Successful Women Navigate Career Breaks (Melbourne Books, 2015).
Introduction
‘I think the key is for women not to set any limits.’
— Martina Navratilova, former world number 1 tennis player.
Kate found it challenging returning to work from maternity leave, and would have felt satisfied returning to a job in her comfort zone. She said if it weren’t for her mentor Adam challenging her thinking she could have missed out on taking one of the best jobs she’s ever had.
As Sophie’s mentor, Jodi has been her greatest cheerleader as well as her toughest critic. Jodi reminds other women to be kind and generous to those coming up behind them and to remember how tough it was when they were younger and striving to succeed.
Wayne believes he is a better football coach and a more mature, grounded and balanced person from having coached women and having a female mentor, Chyloe.
Bec was sixteen years old when she first met Jerril and got a glimpse of what life as a performing artist could be. Jerril knew she had found a kindred spirit in Bec and committed herself to guiding Bec through the difficult professional decisions and life choices a performing artist must inevitably make.
These are just a few of the stories explored in Me and My Mentor, some of them never before told. The experiences and reflections of these women move our thinking beyond descriptions of theory and best practice. They reveal stories of real-life experiences with the voices of women whose mentors were a constant source of inspiration, personal growth and perspective.
Changing hearts and minds one story at a time
The lessons and insights contained in these stories can be applied to both men and women, yet women have a special need to be mentored because of the inequities they continue to experience in the workplace. While women continue to outperform men educationally and are more likely to complete tertiary studies than men1 the leadership gap stubbornly remains. The pipeline of women into management roles is strengthening, yet women continue to be under-represented at the top, with five out of every six CEO roles still being held by men.2 Just as disappointingly, the pay gap has been hovering at between fifteen percent and nineteen percent over the last two decades, but increasing towards management level and reaching 28.8 percent for managers3. Mentoring is one way to start changing these numbers.
What is mentoring?
Textbook definitions often describe mentoring as a professional relationship between an older, wiser, senior mentor sharing their work experiences and wisdom with a younger, junior and inexperienced mentee. This concept has its roots in Greek mythology, when Odysseus, commencing his journey to Troy, entrusted his house and his son’s education to his friend, Mentor. ‘Tell him all you know,’ Odysseus said, and from then the definition of mentoring was firmly established.
However, the real-life experiences of mentors and mentees interviewed in this study demonstrate that the practice of mentoring has moved beyond this top-down construct of a great philosopher or teacher imparting wisdom to a protégé. Mentoring is an evolving process, often with shifting boundaries and changing landscapes. The stories in this book show there is no single definition for a mentor and mentee relationship.
Perhaps it is time to broaden the definition of mentoring and put aside unhelpful and restrictive boundaries. David Kay and Roger Hinds come close when they describe mentoring simply as ‘one person helping another to achieve something…that is important to them.’4 The experiences of women in our research do just that—they demonstrate the many faces of mentoring, with each relationship finding its own meaning, purpose and process. However I also love the simplicity of Oprah Winfrey’s description of mentoring that ‘A mentor is someone who allows you to see the hope inside yourself.’ The
