know love again …
Pt IV: Unspeakable, Spoken Tragedy.
Despite the raging storms he’d suffered, he thought he’d lost all reason to live.
Ready to take his own life that fateful day when seemingly an eternity ago,
unspeakable but spoken tragedy befell his ears…
His wife, unborn child and toddler son vanished! Gone in an accident! So too went his breath, his desire, his zeal; his human fortune, his legacy…
Three caskets - large, medium and small lined in a row, remained closed. There was no opportunity to plant final kisses on foreheads, hands or cheeks.
Open caskets were more than even Pastor could bear given the occupants’ unsightly disfigurements.
Hiding behind masterfully carved wood caskets and cut arranged floral drapery arrangements didn’t lessen the impact of his loved ones horror. The grieving husband and father wanted to see his beloved mangled bodies. It had to be better than what a vivid mind could imagine was packed away in those eternal tombs.
His Xray vision was so hard at work before, during and after the ceremonies that eulogies given brushed past his consciousness.
All ended with a crash …
His house went into foreclosure.
Who needed a house without a family to make it a home? There was nothing to live for but a vagabond’s homeless, loveless future! With the closing of one coffin after the other, his life, his will ended with theirs; or so he thought … Before the new wife, her kids and the new start; the clock signaled in Morse, the Angel’s whispered he thought his life had ended. “Why not help it along with all that’s gone wrong?” He fashioned a noose hung from a sturdy beam Strategically placing a chair just right; beneath freedom’s tug. A premonition then jolted him suddenly as if a bolt of lightening came in through a mysterious crack revealing itself to no one but him! Furrowing his brow deeply as if he ought
capture soon coming raindrops he thought.
What a peculiar oddity with the sun situated high and no storm clouds in sight! Yet the bolt struck knocking him down displacing and violently snatching him from freedom’s soon tug!
It prevented his death before the noose’s grip was snug.
He fell to the floor.
The chair toppled over.
Without phone, email, or text an invisible, inexplicable kind of wireless messenger
sent an indelible current
that hard wired his consciousness, jump-started his caring and cardioverted his defeated heart. With his nervous, cardiovascular, spiritual systems all rewired, reworked, instantaneously he knew he needed to be! But existence meant he had to let go, start anew, open up … No reasons were revealed. He just needed - no, he felt it from the hairs tickling his chin to the calloused soles of his feet. HE NEEDED TO BE! His activated new wiring immediately delivered a message:
Mother’s taken ill. Hospitalized. A heart attack… “Momma?” He simultaneously felt crushing substernal pain making him place a hand over his heart. The pounding in her chest - their chests, hurt in tandem! Suddenly, “No, Momma!” He dashed out. Frantic. “Not Momma, too!” There were no red lights, his old car didn’t stall. Everything, everyone MOVED out of his way; as if on cue. There was an omnipotent authority escorting him. It demanded all to stand back, the elements to behave. Out of breath he arrived. “Mom - Ma!” His mother though weak, reclined grinning from ear-to-ear.
What did she know that he didn’t yet know?
How happy, how peaceful she appeared!
Her head stayed high.
Her focus, her eye
remained steady
gazing and ready…
As if she knew a secret that no one else knew. As if she heard a song that no one else heard. As if an Angel’s words, were the only words whispered into her ear, on the wings of dragonflies hovering near. . . “They told me you were coming. Angel’s breaths, dragonfly flutters… Making such a racket! Tired but hard to sleep with all that racket!” Without uttering another literal word, she hugged him. By osmosis, vivid images and thoughts diffused into him. The most incredible vision came. It seeped into his newly wired soul. She was too weak to utter a sound.
So, she hugged tightly releasing then he simply just knew. Though he was near to losing the last of what was treasured in this life, the most beautiful vision consoled him; as if he was idling in a dream. What he felt was so beautiful appearing too real … His house had been restored. What was taken was given back without pain, without strife. His mother, his children, his wife
assembled together holding hands smiling, healthy.
They were so happy…
Pt V: Cheek -To - Cheek
Behind the doors of this lone standing edifice
was his new start.
His mother awaited him with outstretched arms.
along with his first wife and kids who died many years back in a tragic automobile accident.
He felt this represented a deja vus moment…
A dream.
Not reality.
A hallucination.
Until his newborn daughter staring at him through familiar eyes -
imagined only never before seen until now,
came into his trembling arms passed to him by his beloved wife.
So delicate, so sweet, so real … her flesh. So intelligent, so understanding, so piercing … the eyes; MY EYES! God, if I am in a dream, please let me remain asleep for an ever eternity? The toddler encircled him making airplane noises. Weaving in, out and around daddy’s opening hangar like legs automatically ready to accommodate in familiar play. He’d forgotten the endless energy of his son.
A dream.
He imagined this was REM sleep.
With eyes were closed, he viewed everything through transparent lids. Then Momma spoke, “Close your mouth son and focus before your plane gets lost at sea!” With the grandest familiar cheek - to - cheek smile, she nods, then points towards the toddler.
That unequivocally was the reassuring pinch he needed to acknowledgehis new reality. It was worth waiting a thousand lives and suffering
