dark brow quirked as she shot him a side glance. “For tomorrow’s date?”
He bit back an oath. This unexpected reunion needed to come to an end. No good could possibly come of it, no matter how irresistibly drawn he still was to this woman. Need he remind himself that he was the one who’d let her go? He’d thought at first that might have been a mistake, but over time, as he grew up, he’d realized it had been the right thing to do.
They had been ripped apart by grief and they wanted different things. He had no right to be carrying a torch for her after so long. Even if, in all honesty, seeing her pregnant hit him in a way he couldn’t quite explain.
“Actually, Colt’s fiancée’s birthday is in two days.”
Pepper’s features softened at the mention of his baby brother. “Oh, sorry. I didn’t mean—”
“It’s fine.” He reached forward, taking a premade pink vase with blooms of all sizes and colors. “She’d love this one.”
Silence settled between them and Nolan couldn’t pull his gaze away from hers. They were practically strangers now, but he knew those eyes. They’d always been so expressive and now was no different. He’d never met anyone else with eyes such a mesmerizing shade of dark gray. Pepper was definitely one of a kind.
Weariness reflected back at him now, though, and he couldn’t help wondering what she was facing right now. She was alone, and that tidbit of information didn’t sit well with him.
There were too many parallels to the last time he’d seen her, so it was impossible not to be swept up in nostalgia and bittersweet memories.
Pepper was all woman now, however. There was a level of maturity, almost an underlying stubbornness, that hadn’t been there before. The defiant tilt of her chin, the rigid shoulders, as if she dared him to bring up the past. Fine by him. He was all for living in the here and now... He just hadn’t expected to do it with her back in Stone River.
“I honestly didn’t expect to see you this soon,” she muttered. “It’s harder than I thought.”
Nolan swallowed...that guilt he’d been so good at tamping down suddenly threatening to overcome him.
“If this is too difficult—”
“No.” She shook her head. “We’ve moved on. It’s fine, just...different.”
She pushed her dark, satiny hair back with her hand, those bangles jingling again as she pasted on a smile. “Is this all you need? Two bouquets?”
“Give me your favorite painting,” he added impulsively. “It will be the perfect gift for Annabelle.”
“Colt’s fiancée?”
Nolan nodded. “She’s quite the cook and she has twin daughters, Emily and Lucy.”
Just as he’d hoped, Pepper’s smile widened. He hadn’t anticipated the punch of lust to his gut, though. What the hell?
This smoldering attraction was not welcome. Not. At. All. Memories were one thing, but layering in this fierce, unwanted need was simply not smart. Damn his libido.
“Sounds like Colt is a lucky man.”
If a man wanted a family, sure. Colt and Annabelle were perfect together and had found solace in each other during a tough time. When Annabelle’s father had literally gambled away their home to Colt, the two had sparred for a while before realizing they were crazy in love.
Love worked for some people, not for Nolan. Saving lives and being his own boss were more than rewarding as far as he was concerned. He’d tried the whole relationship thing with Pepper...and look where that had gotten him.
All he needed to do was continue on the way he had: dating, working, living day to day...ignoring that niggle of emptiness that crept up and choked him on occasion.
Nolan was more eager than ever to get to his date. He’d booked reservations at the classiest restaurant about an hour away and if things went as planned, he’d have no trouble taking her back to her place after. Because no woman ever went to his home. Ever. That was his sanctuary, a space he’d built on the back of Pebblebrook for privacy. That house held a special place in his heart and the reason why was standing right in front of him carrying another man’s baby.
After glancing at his purchases spread out on the counter, Nolan pulled out his credit card. Once he had the items paid for, he slid the painting beneath his arm and grabbed the two vases. “Thanks, Pepper.”
She folded her hands on the counter and nodded. “You’re welcome. Be sure to tell your friends where to get gifts for their ladies.”
“I definitely will.” He swallowed hard, deciding to go ahead and tell her what was weighing on his mind. “I’m sorry. I know I said that a long time ago, but...”
Her lids lowered for a second. Then she blew out a breath and met his gaze again. “It’s over, Nolan. I’m focusing on my baby, this new life I’m rebuilding. I can’t look back.”
Rebuilding. How many times had she done that since he’d left her? Pepper had always been such a vibrant woman, always happy and smiling. The loss of their child had dimmed her spark, and the way he broke things off had doused what little flicker of light had remained. He’d often wondered over the years if she’d ever found joy again...or who she’d found it with.
More potential heartbreak was definitely something he couldn’t and didn’t want to deal with. The risk was too great to even entertain such thoughts.
They’d both done exactly what they’d set out to do. He was damn happy being a doctor and a rancher. And his bachelor status would remain intact. He was getting ready to help Colt gear up to open Pebblebrook as a dude ranch, so any spare time he had was taken.
“I wish you the best,” he stated, the blasted guilt settling heavy in his chest. “See you around.”
“Yeah, see you,” she said softly.
With one final nod, Nolan headed out the door. He couldn’t get out of Painted Pansies fast enough. Sleep deprivation could cause a man to start thinking about things, decisions he’d made and everything he’d given up to seek success.
But Nolan didn’t have regrets on the path he’d taken. He did regret hurting Pepper, though, so much it cut him to the core. At one time he would’ve done anything for her, but in the end, they’d wanted different things and he couldn’t be what she wanted.
Nothing had changed since then, either. He’d opted not to have a family after they lost their child. He wouldn’t say he shut down exactly, but he’d certainly reevaluated what he desired in life and he knew for certain he wished never to go through that kind of anguish again.
Nolan carefully set the arrangements on the back floorboard of his SUV. This quaint shop Pepper had was perfect for her. For as long as he’d known her, she’d had a flare for art and creativity. She’d been a dreamer, one of the things he’d loved most about her.
Without looking back to see inside the wide storefront window, Nolan forced himself to move forward. Wasn’t that what he’d always done? Pushed onward, no matter what was going on internally. That was what made him one of the best
